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And that's what the people who feel the need to bash others are. We all had this surgery because we were addicted to food and let it get out of control, completely degrading someone and making them feel an inch tall because they made a mistake or slipped up is utterly pathetic. Correct me if I'm wrong, but this is supposed to be a SUPPORT forum not a b***h at people who screw up forum. The people who slipped up and confessed OBVIOUSLY know they made a mistake, and they're adult enough to admit it on here so why get on their case? You don't have to say "aw no big deal" or sugar coat, but you also don't have to be rude and snobby like you've never ever made a mistake in life. Grow up, as for me I'll find a website or forum that is all about support and not a bunch of assholes degrading people who need help the most.

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And that's what the people who feel the need to bash others are. We all had this surgery because we were addicted to food and let it get out of control' date=' completely degrading someone and making them feel an inch tall because they made a mistake or slipped up is utterly pathetic. Correct me if I'm wrong, but this is supposed to be a SUPPORT forum not a b***h at people who screw up forum. The people who slipped up and confessed OBVIOUSLY know they made a mistake, and they're adult enough to admit it on here so why get on their case? You don't have to say "aw no big deal" or sugar coat, but you also don't have to be rude and snobby like you've never ever made a mistake in life. Grow up, as for me I'll find a website or forum that is all about support and not a bunch of assholes degrading people who need help the most.[/quote']

I completely agree!! .. I don't consider anything anyone does a mistake! We all have our own unique journey. I had this surgery so that I can eat like a normal person for once in my life. I don't "screen" what I eat. I eat anything I want just small portions now. I am 5 1/2 months out and down 69 lbs. I have 40 to go and am happier than I have ever been. Support people in their own journey! What works for one person is not the gospel and may not work for others. Snobby and rude people are suffering from more than obesity so take those criticisms with a grain of salt! Enjoy your life!! It's wonderful to be shrinking!!

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I just don't understand why some people are so stuck on the actions of others. If I decide to eat a small fries from McDonald's right now and then post, nothing you say will remove those fries from my stomach. Telling me I'm a screw up, that I might die, that I have hidden motives, that I wasn't ready for surgery, etc won't change the fact that the fries are sitting in my sleeve. It won't change the fact that I have a sleeve and that I made a poor choice. Encouraging me to make better choices in the future would help.

And if something happened to me, the "blood" would be on my own hands as my hands fed me the fries. Not anyone else's.

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I just don't understand why some people are so stuck on the actions of others. If I decide to eat a small fries from McDonald's right now and then post' date=' nothing you say will remove those fries from my stomach. Telling me I'm a screw up, that I might die, that I have hidden motives, that I wasn't ready for surgery, etc won't change the fact that the fries are sitting in my sleeve. It won't change the fact that I have a sleeve and that I made a poor choice. Encouraging me to make better choices in the future would help.

And if something happened to me, the "blood" would be on my own hands as my hands fed me the fries. Not anyone else's.[/quote']

Well said, I couldn't have said it any better myself.

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When you posts in a public forum, you have to ne grown-up enough to handle ALL responses, not just the ones you want to hear.

You gotta take the good with the bad on a forum such as this.

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When you posts in a public forum' date=' you have to ne grown-up enough to handle ALL responses, not just the ones you want to hear.

You gotta take the good with the bad on a forum such as this.[/quote']

Geez... I meant "post" and "be". Stupid phone...

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I consider it more of an information exchange. I don't count on nameless, faceless people on the Internet for support. And they don't hurt my feelings either. But that's just me.

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Someone posting a confession is either looking for someone to tell them that they'll be OK (absolution) or looking to be given some tough love. Its impossible for strangers to tell, nor should it be their responsibility, to know what the confessor needs, on a public forum. People wanting absolution should go to friends, family, their priest, etc. Asking a bunch of people that don't know you if they were wrong to eat that french fry or whole pizza need to realize that this is a bunch of people that have worked very hard to learn some difficult new skills and realizing that they can never eat certain trigger or slider foods again. It's threatening to them to think about eating those foods, so why wouldn't they react badly to hear someone else doing the same. I'm not defending bad behavior, and we should all be courteous to one another, but the person that remarked about "blood on his hands" makes the point of how imperative it is to most here to follow the plan. I hope to give the newer people help some day, I'm still new myself since I've just been sleeved Dec 6, but I'm not anyone's mom. I don't love them like she could, and if I say something harsh, its because it's the best way that I know how.

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I see both sides. The truth is, we're all adults. The choices we make either have consequences or rewards and we have to live with those outcomes( good or bad). No one likes to hear tough love or negative comments. I know I don't, but, as adults, we have to be able to interpret good intentions versus bad ones and dismiss them if the ones that are bad( sticks and stones, right?) I'm sure most people are well meaning but their delivery is a little off and it comes across as pious or condescending. Take it with a grain of salt. Life really is too short to take offense. Sure it stings, but it shouldn't dictate your life. You are going to do what you want despite what anyone says... So who cares? I've learned a lot from this forum and have a lot more to learn. I appreciate the honesty and how open everyone is about their experiences. I take what I need to to heart and leave the nonsense behind. There's always going to be someone out there being judgmental or think they know the best way to do things. You do what is best for you. Do you really give a hoot what others think? If so, then maybe you're not ready.... I'm really just kidding! :). Have a glorious day and enjoy this journey!

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I can't agree with you enough. I was recently bashed like that and completely ready to find somewhere else to go. I didn't slip i just simply asked a question. Thank you so much for speaking out.

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Not to minimize your concern, but there seems to be an oversupply of negative energy the last few days - on both sides.

I know I feel heartbroken on top of normal holiday and VSG stress. I feel a strong kinship with everyone here.

Sent from my iPhone using VST

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But let's be honest, you asked about drinking alcohol one week after surgery. I think some "duh" answers are to be expected when asking a question that has SUCH an obvious answer!

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Okay folks, first off, I am moving this topic to "Rants and Raves". Recently, we have been deleting posts such as this, that are created for the sole purpose of bashing others. However, I feel many of you have some valid points. Thus, I will allow it to remain open for now. However, I am going to STRONGLY REMIND all of you, to remember our rules as posted here:

http://www.verticalsleevetalk.com/index.php?app=forums&module=extras&section=boardrules

I have had to post several warnings such as this in other threads tonight and the past couple of days, and I keep seeing the same names over and over again. Therefore, if this thread gets out of control, I will not hesitate to close and delete it. If you are not able to be polite, respect one another, refrain from name calling, etc., and can't remember to attack the idea and not the person, then I will also not hesitate to issue warnings and bans.

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But let's be honest' date=' you asked about drinking alcohol one week after surgery. I think some "duh" answers are to be expected when asking a question that has SUCH an obvious answer![/quote']

I have never posted about alcohol because I don't even drink it, wrong person.

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