How Did You Know Surgery Was The Right Choice?

[mkb805 2]

How did everyone know that surgery was right for them? I don't have a surgery date but kinda starting to have second thoughts. Some of my family is very against me doing this. I do want to lose weight but last time I did (Phentermine and topamax mix, got down to 190 lbs) I noticed people who never gave me the time of day when I was fat started talking to me. As I gained weight again, I lost the "friends" I had. Has anyone else noticed as you lose weight the more people are "interested" in you? I do get called a fat a$$ and everything like that at work. It would be nice to not hear that but everyone seems so judgemental!

[Cookeeeeez 269]

I think At this stage maybe you would find some counselling helpful in your decision. It seems to me (been there, done that) that you have a lot of self-esteem issues and maybe you're worried if you lose weight again you might not know who to trust... The funny thing is I made a lot of new friends in the early stages of anorexia that couldn't give me the time of day when I was in rehab, but as I more than tripled my weight I have met the love of my life and some lifelong friends... Sure the weight can make a difference but you need to know who you really are before you can let other people back in again

I hope this helps, I'm set for June 2013 and as most on here know am taking this time to be thoroughly sure I'm ready for this step mentally! peace

[Joisey01 87]

Having the sleeve isn't an easy answer for anyone. However, if you choose to do it, you have to make that decision based on YOU. It is impossible to get through this journey without support!

This forum has answered a lot of questions for me. I had already made my decision to sleeve before I found this forum. The closer I am to my surgery date (September 20, 2012) the more I am finding myself visiting to get ideas, support and self-confidence.

Of course, too, as the date comes closer, I get anxious. I know I have made the best decision for ME. I am fortunate enough to have a husband and two sons that do support me. I haven't told anyone else but one person at work. The only reason I shared it with him is because he is having the sleeve in October. He and I will have each other to lean on while we're at work. I haven't said anything to those that I even suspected wouldn't support me and that includes 4 siblings.

Take as long as you need to make a decision. Do as much research as you need to do. This is a lifetime decision.

Hang in there.

[ozeedonkee 145]

Some of my family is very against me doing this.

I briefly mentioned VSG to one of my sisters. I got a very negative response. I have chosen that I won't be sharing my decision to have a VSG until AFTER it's done. I know my family love me - but I've made the decision. I believe it's an informed decision, and it's not up for discussion. It's normal that they would be concerned for you. But ultimately, only you can decide what is best for you.

[xavtay2 85]

Hello MKB

I am having my sleeve done on next Monday, September 10th. I am becoming very anxious at this point but I know without a doubt this surgery is for me. How? I originally began my journey wanting the Lapband. I went they that process for a year only to be denied by my insurance company!!!! During the process of appeal I was encouraged to find another doctor. I found De Marema at my initial consultation he told me about the sleeve. I had never even heard of this procedure until then and that was July. After praying about it researching it watching tons of videos and finding this forum I know without a doubt the sleeve is for me. All of my life I have done what made everyone else happy. I am now 40 years old and tired of living a life that I did not want. I am doing this for me.... No regrets and anxiety is normal but I am going to do this because I know it is the right choice for me

[desertmom 297]

Everyone is judgemental.So what?

It is you and you alone that can walk this walk.Will you lose friends?maybe.Will people treat you differently?For sure...but that is the way of the world and its called the human condition.The faster we learn to deal with that,the better our lives will be.

Harsh but my experience.Why do you want surgery is a very important question.

If I knew where my LITERALLY LIFE LONG EFFORTS to lose weight would have gotten me (nowhere) I would have done this surgery 10 years ago.

Good luck and seeing a therapist is an excellent idea.It helps us to get the answers we so desperately seek and make the conclusions we need to move forward.

[notime 340]

Keep reminding yourself why you need the surgery: health, quality of life and even life itself. At this point, having tried diet after diet only to be unsuccessful, there are no other options.

I can not believe people at work call you those things. What kind of people are these and what kind of work environment do you have? I suggest that once you are through the surgery and accustomed to all of the changes look for another job.

[lynneo 15]

I knew sugery was the right thing for me when I hit 308 at the doctor's office. I was so embarassed--- I guess like 297 was a "great" weight. I knew I could not continue to live like that----- knee pain, insulin-dependent diabetes, high blood pressure, couldn't get up off the floor without LOTS of effort, could hardly sit in a plane seat.......

I was trying to decide between the lap-band and true by-pass. My doctor said my insurance had just started approving gastric sleeve, and that was it!!!

Family was unsure---- but I pushed on and they all eventually got on board and supported me.

I love it, I am glad I did it, and wish I had done it 10 years ago. I am living again.

[mkb805 2]

I think At this stage maybe you would find some counselling helpful in your decision. It seems to me (been there, done that) that you have a lot of self-esteem issues and maybe you're worried if you lose weight again you might not know who to trust... The funny thing is I made a lot of new friends in the early stages of anorexia that couldn't give me the time of day when I was in rehab, but as I more than tripled my weight I have met the love of my life and some lifelong friends... Sure the weight can make a difference but you need to know who you really are before you can let other people back in again

I hope this helps, I'm set for June 2013 and as most on here know am taking this time to be thoroughly sure I'm ready for this step mentally! peace

I tried talking to a psychiatrist once. All she wanted to do was give me meds. I took what she gave me but it really messed me up. The combo of pills was giving me black outs. I am way too freaked out to try getting help again!!! I have to get everything approved by insurance so she was the only one my insurance would cover that was close.

[mkb805 2]

Keep reminding yourself why you need the surgery: health, quality of life and even life itself. At this point, having tried diet after diet only to be unsuccessful, there are no other options.

I can not believe people at work call you those things. What kind of people are these and what kind of work environment do you have? I suggest that once you are through the surgery and accustomed to all of the changes look for another job.

I work retail. Usually the problem is when customer's dont get their way I am called fat a$$ or anything else along those lines. I would like to go back to school when I can get my credit card paid off. I know working where I work has caused a lot of stress!

[desertmom 297]

Hi

Not a psychiatrist.A therapist or psychologist is what qe need when we have to sort out stuff.Listen,it is really perspective what we need very often and therapy really really helps give you that.Very often we just dont have the ability to get this by ourselves.

psychiatrist mostly do just give meds.Which we very often dont want or need.

Good luck.

[swizzly 901]

Really? Because I deserved some lasting SUCCESS after all the weight-related failures I've had over the past four decades. It was something I did for me, and it was in the top three best decisions of my life. I've never had a single regret, not even for a single second (no kidding, not one). It's been awesome every step of the way, even when it was a bit challenging, just because I knew THIS TIME it would work, and I seriously deserved it. I have told very few people about it cos I'm quite private, but I don't really care what anyone else thinks anyhow. Again: For ME. For LIFE.

[notime 340]

I work retail. Usually the problem is when customer's dont get their way I am called fat a$$ or anything else along those lines. I would like to go back to school when I can get my credit card paid off. I know working where I work has caused a lot of stress!

I thought you meant your co-workers were being rude, but customers also should never treat you like that. I hope you will be able to go to school and get a less stressful job. Pay off those bills!