Skip to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

BariatricPal

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.

Join BariatricPal free

  • Ask your own questions
  • Reply and follow topics
  • Message other members
  • No cost, no spam

Sex... Oh My God... Sex!

  • Popular Post

First real "encounter" since the surgery (lots of fooling around, but yesterday was... the full meal deal). And... guys... wow. GET THIS SURGERY.

Before the surgery, I was a real "one minute wonder" (if I could even get lucky; at 338, it doesn't happen much). I would be panting and wheezing and see spots, and I was lucky to even be able to finish. I was used to the woman not... finishing, either.

Yesterday.

SEVEN. HOURS.

She had more... moments of joy than I could count (maybe 12? 15? 20?), and I had... THREE.

THREE. In one night! Guys, I'm 42. That just doesn't HAPPEN to guys my age.

And it certainly never happened before the sleeve.

Good god, men, if you have ANY problems in that area at all and are pre-sleeve, RUN, don't walk, and get the surgery.

UN-FREAKING-BELIEVABLE. I thought that stuff only happened in porno movies...

Ok, I'll shut up now. But... wow.

Sore... exhausted... and happy ;)

Edit: uh, it wasn't seven hours continuously, I should mention... 8pm till 3am, but not all, uh, action. Even at my current fitness level, that WOULD kill me. Seven hours of go... rest, chat, laugh... go... rest, chat, laugh... repeat until too sore and exhausted to continue! And NOW I WILL shut up.

  • Replies 228
  • Views 74.1k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Featured Replies

@@Stevehud right??? they will see this post and still comment on the thread too..... I respect their room and have never gone and posted in their respective area. one of the issues with the forum...

Why are there so many women in the guys room?

They are just sneakin a peak..

  • 8 months later...

This is fabulous. I shouldn't share too much but neither my husband nor I have wanted to do anything like that recently. We love each other very much. We cuddle and kiss and show so much affection, but THAT takes a lot out of two big people who work all the time. I was sleeved on 8/10, and he is eating what I eat. He's not doing the shakes and liquids, but he consumes the same calories and the same grams of Protein. He's lost 10lbs since I started the pre-op diet two weeks ago. Reading this made me feel good not because of the sex but because it solidified what I already knew - sex is hard work, and can be embarassing for a bigger guy. It's not just me. It's both of us. Now he says he wants to be as sexy for me as I will be for him. We've become closer. So, the sleeve can do as much good for healthy relationships as it can tear apart the unhealthy ones.

I really wanted to reply to this. Yes, sex is a LOT of work for a big guy. Ladies, all due respect, but most of the time, sex is all about US doing the work -- abs and core, legs, arms. If you're out of shape, as a guy, sex can absolutely destroy your stamina, and let's face it -- collapsing like a pile of Jello halfway through just ain't sexy. So we try REALLY hard to please y'all, but when you're that heavy, it just ain't going to happen!

Add to this the fact that fat converts testosterone to estrogen (yes, estrogen. Look up lipid aromatization for proof...) and you see a real "double whammy" for us guys emerging; not only are we expected to be nearly machine-like in our movements, with no reaction to the sheer strain and stress of moving 250, 300, 400 pounds of flesh around (not counting the lady!), but our testosterone can dip so low that we have a hard time keeping an erection (and what THAT means, ladies, is that ANY distraction can make "it" go away -- slowing the rhythm, changing position, even just worrying that "oh god, I'm gonna lose it!" And when you're panting and wheezing and worried about having a heart attack (yes, contrary to urban legend, people can and do regularly have heart attacks or strokes during sex), that's a pretty serious distraction. So, for a heavy guy, sex really ain't much FUN! We want to do it to keep our lady friends happy, and sure, it FEELS good, but it also feels like we're gonna die, it's a race against the clock with whether Mr. Happy will keep playing along, and a lot of times those negatives outweigh (heh) the positives.

Now, switch to skinny sex. My muscles are MORE than capable of hauling my carcass around and doing ALL sorts of interesting positional things. Sure, I sweat and breathe hard in the throes of passion, but my heart and lungs are healthy and I have a ton of stamina, so I'm not worried some artery is going to explode. And best of all, because my testosterone MORE THAN DOUBLED without drugs, just by losing the weight, my libido is crazy -- that one hormone makes ALL the difference between just being caught up in my head and worrying about how I'm going to "perform" and getting utterly, absolutely lost in the moment. And that is so insanely sexy. Apparently for both of us!

So yes, ladies, if you want a better love life, definitely lose weight, but get your guy to lose weight too. You will NOT regret it!

How much weight did you lose before this stuff kicked in?

@@Mulepick - It varies, but as you start losing quickly many hormones are dumped out of the fat and flood your system...see http://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/343777-guys-room-is-everyone-else-overly-emotional-or-am-i-just-an-ae/

Strangely I was feeling it the first week with a vegence

  • 2 weeks later...

Ha ha ha that's awesome

Keep up the good thang

  • 3 weeks later...

This could have gone here or You know you lost weight when ...But I'll keep in the guys room

When you can have sex in the back of your car at 52, just because you can...yes!!!!

Where's the guy's room?

  • 4 weeks later...

Down 173lbs since January, sleeved 7/13. Can not wait to take this new chassis out to the test track! Best thread ever lol!

OK guys, I know up until now you have been reading thread thinking how awesome it is or will be. It's not. I'm tired. Just tired... I'm only a man, not a machine. I literally have lied to my wife and said that I had to get up early the next day, or I have a headache, or my back is spasming... anything to get some sleep at night.

I feel like a piece a meat. Sometimes I just want to be held, is that so wrong?!

No. Well, not anymore. But that did happen in the beginning!

What I am referring to however is that my wife cannot keep her hands off me. At all. My god man, I'm chafing!

No. Well, not anymore. But that did happen in the beginning!

What I am referring to however is that my wife cannot keep her hands off me. At all. My god man, I'm chafing!

I feel your pain. I'm in love with a woman who does marathons for fun and is planning on doing the Kona Tri. Oh well, pass the lube and soldier on my friend. A man's gotta do, what a man's gotta do. Lie back, think of England and all that. ;-)

Edited by OKCPirate

I'm slowly getting back into a somewhat normal for me sex routine. I have had sex twice within the last 6 days which isn't bad, but I would honestly like to have had it 6 times within the last 6 days. But yeah what I have learned is that my stamina has indeed returned to pre-surgery form. Before the surgery, sex was the only physical activity I could do for very long periods of time and be happy about it. Now I can easily do about 35 to 40 minutes of intense cardio and feel good. Would rather be having sex, but hey a work out is a work out.

How many men have routinely checked their testosterone levels checked throughout their weight loss? I ask because I was on TRT before surgery and have worked with my urologist to helped maintain levels to help me keep the most lean muscle possible. I'm 42 (almost 43) and almost a month post VSG.

I include this in this post because of it's inextricable effects on libido and sex life.

@@dmedic72 I started doing T shots a few years ago. And while I expected to increase the amount by 1% per year to make up for the expected average drop in production. One year post surgery I actually need to decrease my dosage by nearly 40%. My levels were just too high after the last test. This is post rapid fat loss hormone dump (which is significant and discussed in the guy's room). I'd give you the exact numbers but the web site where it's stored is doing maintenance.

Interesting fact, your testosterone level will drop when you quit smoking. Or after you become single after 40. But it will increase when you lose fat. Which explains many of the posts on this topic.

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Account

Navigation

Search

Search

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.