Ugh Really World? Now Is Not The Time!

[Stelina 4]

As part of my preop program I have started to quit overeating and smoking. Both of those habits usually go into over drive during stressful times. I think finding out my mom needs a heart transplant, that I have to somehow manage to pay more for my surgery than I originally thought WHILE being unemployed, just the simple fact that I AM unemployed, oh and the fact that I spent the better part of last night talking to the woman the love of my life has been having an affair with for a few MONTHS counts as stress don't you? It's already a battle to quit those habits and they're calling to me even more now that I'm stressed beyond belief. Now is not the time for all this drama.

[NancyJerry 139]

Man, that does really suck (pardon my french). But... What would it look like if we put a positive spin on it??

I SERIOUSLY PRAY that your mom gets her new heart and has no complications!

After you have your surgery and rock your sleeve, here is what you can do:

1 - know that you would have paid double to get this life altering surgery.

2 - get a kick-a$$ job with your rockin' new look

3 - send pics to your lousy cheating "love of your life" (sorry if you plan to take him back but you shouldn't you deserve better!!!!!!!!) and show him what he's missing out on

4 - spend the better part of some night with a knight in shining armor that won't cheat on you - without taking a cigarette break!

5 - get healthy and walk and exercise and be with your mom for many happy and healthy years to come!

I don't mean this disrespectfully in any way. I know life doles out lemons sometimes in huge quantities. Hang in there, it will all be worth it. YOU are worth it!

[lalbert 6]

Great way to turn bad negative into a positive. Good advice.

[Catracks 865]

I couldn't have said it better!

[jessica0728 11]

Definitely great way to turn that around! Hope things get better for you

[Stelina 4]

I didn't take any offense to your comments. I really appreciate them. And no I definitely do NOT plan on taking him back. I look forward to everything you said and that lying cheating scumbag can eat his heart out when I'm through. I need to remember everything you said when I crave a cigarette or a Carb overload. Its all for the better. I can do this.

[Marisa46 7]

Stellina, when I read your post, I couldn't help but relate. I was in a similar set of circumstances a year ago:

1. My Mom has Alzheimer we are trying to keep her at home but it didn't seem like it was going to happen because
   
2. My Dad who is horrible with finances had managed to put my family in the position where there was an excellent chance for a foreclosure on my parent's home.
   
3. The love of my life , my soul mate, the man of my dreams had just embezzled, absconded with $25 k and I was looking at financial ruin while
   
4. Said love of life was in Big Bear with HEATHER
   

Fortunately, I am employed (Praise God) I've been unemployed many times the last time was in 2003, I know what it's like to know you won't get a job you interview for because the interviewer gives your hips that "OMG she's huge!" look. I'm not going to try to put a positive spin on anything because the number of things that you are going through now would BREAK a weak person. BUT

That's the bright spot. YOU ARE NOT WEAK! You can get through this SH#+ and you will thrive because you haven't given up. I'm in awe that with everything that is going on in your life you are choosing to go through WLS and improve your life. Please don't give up on yourself. The WLS process is hard but you are up to the challenge. Go out and kick some kharmic a$$!

[Stelina 4]

Its so nice to hear "you're strong to be able to deal with this" (as opposed to oh that sucks but dont let it get you down... uh how am i supposed to NOT let it get me down..!?!) and to know that others have gone through similar situations and the universe isn't singling me out and ganging up on me!

[Marisa46 7]

and the universe isn't singling me out and ganging up on me!

LOL! I had that feeling so many times. I'll tell you what I tell my tantrum throwing 'inner child' Life is hard and no one knows how hard it is until there up against it. If you are happy where you are don't move but if life is making you unhappy and you want change get busy. Your choosing to love yourself and make changes is getting busy. APPLAUSE

[Stelina 4]

I am so happy I decided to post my situation because your words help immensely. Honestly I'm reading it over and over telling myself they're right. I can do this. I'm a strong woman. I will get through this. Your words are very empowering. Thank you for listening and for your advice and support.

[Catracks 865]

BTW, I still smoke one or two cigarettes a day. Stupid ass right? I stopped before and after the surgery for healing sake, but I simply enjoy that ONE DAMNED vice I have left. I'm a fitness, health food nut that smokes.

Yes, you have to nix the butts. Here's hoping that the cigarettes stay out of your life for good.

Like Marisa, I think you are strong because you are taking all this head on, You seem determined.

[MinaT 669]

Sometimes it hits hard. I have a small brain tumor, lupus and had pleurisy at the 5 month pre-approval stage, worried my butt off about getting denied.

I had surgery June 4th. June 9th I found out my father is in jeopardy of going paralyzed and needs a cervical spine operation. My mother needs an operation on her legs, my husband has a serious bunion that needs operated on. Yesterday, my best friend lost her 55 year old husband to cancer and she lives clear across the United States and I'm not going to be cleared to travel to be with her. I didn't get to say goodbye to her husband, one of my best friendsThe stress is palatable and my heart aches.

One of my 13 year old cats is suffering and in pain, and there really is nothing that can be done, and we brought her in Saturday to the doctors we decided to keep her home a few more days to say our goodbyes and I have to bring her in this week to put to sleep. Both my in laws are experiencing serious health issues and live in another state. We are seriously low on funds right now to the point, I can't afford to try try different shakes, because I am not tolerating well the shakes I am on and I have been on nothing but liquids for 5 solid weeks and tomorrow when I see surgeon, he's probably going to keep me on full liquids another 2 weeks. After I heal up enough my parents get surgery, and my husband gets surgery, I will need to go back in for cervical spine surgery myself. Same 3 as my father.

The stress is something we will have to deal with the rest of our lives. It's a constant and it's called life. I am just trying so hard to suck it up and turning to food hasn't worked for me. I used to smoke, not much, but I did during times of stress and all that got me was weak lungs and now I get pneumonia often.

I now rely on my strength and Gods to get me through. Other vices just made things worse.

Good luck and I hope things get better soon.

[Tippy2us 11]

First of all, HUGS to you! You Rock!! Pick up a book called The Secret....trust me :-)

[iegal 460]

This sleeve thing is going to be a breeze for you.

You have so many challenges already and you are going to be strong, ready to face them head on. You are able to say YES to a new you, NO to an old you in many ways. Remember you are capable of making a fresh start.

Sad to say but people (strangers) treat you differently after this sleeve surgery. Be prepared for a new you. It is okay to mourn what was but do not sabatoge your bright future.

Hugs - we are here to cheerlead you on.

[Chubarella 87]

*HUGS* I'm sorry to hear about all this troubling your heart. The forum is always here for support of any kind.