THIS POST IS NOT A SLAM ON ANY ONE MEMBER. IT IS A SLAM ON US ALL AS A WHOLE. SO BE FOREWARNED IF YOU OFFEND EASILY. STOP READING NOW!

OK YOU WERE WARNED.

I have been a member of LBT for almost 3 years now. I was asked to be a moderator about 6 months into my membership. Some of us (yes me included) had ups and downs with regards to behaving on this forum.

Here is my line of thinking after I learned the hard way how to deal with something I don't like being said. IGNORE it. You just feed into the drama if you respond to something you don't like. The TRUE friends you have will know better about your true character.

If someone came on here and said that I used my body to get money out of men and was a drug addict and had my kids taken away from me because of it. What do I care? How can that possible HURT me physically with my TRUE friends? And if the rest of the membership chooses to believe those comments then no matter how much I protest they will think I it is true. SO why expend all your energy when that is what the other poster wants? Just to keep the drama flowing. Stop feeding into it.

I know it is hard to not do that but come on people. This is grade school or high school either. Who cares what people say? Who cares what doctor is the best or worst? WHO CARES?

I, as a moderator and a member, am tired of the bickering and fighting and rehashing of old topics. Why do you insist on opening old wounds that have healed and left NO scars? What purpose does it serve? Let them alone. Leave them alone.

Shit happened on LBT it will happen again, after all we are women, We eat our young. LOL!! Laugh here please. LOL!!

If what I have said makes Alex remove me as a moderator then so be it. It is a hard job and it really depresses me when I see people I consider battle sisters and brothers in this war on obesity using that energy wastefully. Direct that anger or whatever it is on tackling and beating that obesity horse. That I can sink my teeth into. See it all goes back to food. LOL!! Laugh here too! LOL!!

Get a life! Stop posting on threads if the subject doesn't speak to you. And ignore the people tha slam you.

I will say however, that inflammatory comments ARE NOT ACCEPTIBLE! You tread a fine line when you make those kinds of statements or assumptions. Just think before you speak people. Ask yourself would you say this to your Lord, Buddha, Goddess, Muhammad, whatever you worship. The devil or dark forces seems to have a hold of some of us and using us for no good. Take back those reins and smack him off the horse.

OK I am done. I might be done literally as a moderator too. IF so then this will be my parting post.

I wanna be Tennessee Tuxedo.

"Right Chumley, let's go see Mister Whoopee"

"Duh... gee Tennessee"

I wish I was an Oscar Mayer weiner, because then everyone would be in love with me.

I want to be... happy with being me.

FAT chance.

FAT.

FATTY FATTY FAT FAT.

There, I feel all mature and crap.

Wheetsin, I am sorry if I have caused you any pain.

If my inclination is correct, you have probably gotten at least a few PM's about me. Yes, I do debate and yes, what I write can be more to the point than some would like, but I think I have stayed within the guide-lines. I have been called names, but have not called anyone a name.

I think that we must all realize that the internet is international and that rah-rah USA is not everybody's opinion. My thoughts are uniquely mine, but I will always be open to a PM if I step over the line in the opinion of any moderator, or if I encroach too closely to the line.

In the USA, certain things are taken for granted. I do not believe in nationalism, so just because 99% of the members are USA citizens and 98% think something is true, it doesn't make it true. All of us have a right to our opinions. What has made the USA different than all the countries of the world has been that (while the majority rules) the minority have the right to be heard.

Before I destroy this thread, I pledge never to insult or call anyone a name and to be civil at all times. I will however feel free to comment on any topic of interest to me whether my opinion is popular or not. If the moderators want me to go because they feel that I am causing them too much grief, then I will leave.

I hope my forthrightness does not cause an affront to anyone here, but that's how I see it.

You've never caused me any pain T.O.M. You'll probably see a lot of similarity in what we post, only yours lean towards the political whereas mine are toward the psychological. I'm sure we've both made & lost "friends" in our postings.

Nodding in agreement with you Penni - well said!

My granny used to say "if you haven't anything nice to say, don't say anything at all"

I try to live by this (except obviously when people wear vile clothes and I have to be Undercover Fashion Police and make an arrest...) and just ignore anyone obnoxious - like Alexandra pointed out, the poster of the offending comments is the one who looks bad - no point in stooping to their level.

by the way - what's this all about? What did I miss????!!!!!!!!

only kidding.

ish.

I've been reading some threads today where people are forgetting to "say something nice." Anybody else reading the same ones I am?!?!?!? I sure hope there isn't any new drama starting here at LBT!!! :tired

I couldn't agree more with what Alexandra said - "The poster of the offending comment is the one who looks bad." :scalesno:

Why can't everyone just be nice?!?!?!?!?!

Oh don't get me wrong I love a heated discussion as well. I love to argue my point but not at the detriment of the arguee.

At my house, you lose the right to argue your point if you attack the person instead of their opinion/perspective.

Because human beings don't get along.

And as for Tired Old Man - I've debated with you on at least one occasion and found the debate enjoyable. I've no problem with your approach or your stance even if it is contrary to mine :scalesno:

I agree Tired Old Man, I have read several of your posts. Even though I don't agree with everything you say, you have never come out & attacked anyone. You simply state your opinion. There's nothing wrong with having an opinion. :scalesno:

Everyone know's what opinions are like, right? :scalesno: And we all got 'em!

I have watched and read the "other" threads. I see some new threads today and fear that its starting all over again. I certainly hope not. I did enjoy the entertainment, but it does deter from the purpose of this forum. This is a great place to get support and discuss other issues that effect us. Its a fun place. I hope it remains that way. I think the moderators do a fine job, although hard, to keep control.

I fully hope that differences can be settled or ignored. Taking the relaxed approach and just blowing insults off is an easy thing to say, but it is trully more difficult to do.

We can hope though that things calm down, and remain calm - at least for a while. :scalesno:

Get a life! Stop posting on threads if the subject doesn't speak to you. And ignore the people tha slam you.

You took the words out of my mouth!! I am tired of it too. Especially since it always seems to be the same people. Do the mods have any discretion to take action? Take a look, you'll see the obvious common denominator with ALL the locked threads. Bottom line, don't go where your not wanted and then cry, "don't tell me what to do". They know they are only there to cause trouble and drudge up the past. If you do, take heed that every member has a right to take a firm stand on their beliefs. Stay away from threads if you are only there to start trouble. A good debate is awesome.....name calling and cussing is unacceptable and should be stopped permanently by the guilty parties.

We all bring our baggage with us. I may have read into the opening post things that were not there.

To paraphrase Dickens, I find that PM's are the best at times and the worst at times.

PM's are great to apologize or to clear the air. They are fine for sharing a point that might cause the forum to erupt.

BUT

They are the bane of many a forum because of the plotting that goes on.

I am a relative newcomer at LapBandTalk.com, but I have been around. A relative of mine who is a staunch conservative and BuSh lover, introduced me a forum for PC problems. When non-PC related threads starting interferring with the PC questions and answers, an Off-Topic section or SandBox (similar to the LBT's lounge) was added and I became a vibrant poster there. After a while many members starting PM'ing me with suggestions and warnings about other members looking to do me harm.

At the same time, some of those same members were PM'ing my relative (No one knew we were related) with similar lines. They were stirring the pot between a leader of the conservative faction and a leader of the liberal faction. Things got so out of hand that it didn't matter what the topic was, within 3 replies on any thread, A was calling Z names, Y was calling B names...

I left the forum because exchanges of ideas where no longer taking place. I have posted three times there in the last 2 years. I start a thread with a long post on something that I consider important and then leave.

Getting back to the grist of my post here. I hope the members of this forum can learn to live and let live. I don't know much about the old wounds here, but I do know we live in a society with a lot of open wounds. I hope to be able to contribute to the main purpose of this forum and will help whenever and whoever I can.