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When Did It Hit You?



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I love reading all these conversations because it inspires me and gives me hope again. Right before my LapBand slipped and was removed my BMI hit NORMAL! The feeling of being considered normal and not obese gave me an overwhelming feeling of pride. But what it didn't do is make me like myself. Just because I lost the weight didn't mean that I had dealt with all the issues that caused me to gain weight in the fist place. When I lost my tool I immediately started to put the weight back on. So this time around I'm working on getting my head straight so I'm ready not only to have a normal BMI but to truly feel valuable inside and out. Even after the VSG if we don't deal with our head our body may not follow us in the long term.

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It is still daily struggle for me. I am over 115 pounds down and everyone is noticing, but most days I still see the same lumps and bumps.

There are a few occasions that it really hits me, I had 2 over the last week:

- Had to give my drivers license to someone and looked at the photo of me (from a year ago) and I saw a massive difference. Tho at the time I thought i looked good and "skinny" ...little did I know.

- I had a photo taken at a friends birthday and I did not recognise myself

Each day it gets easier, but it is something I need to work on as much as I work at eatting and exercising.

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I think after maintaining for a few months....I was so paranoid that I'd lose all this weight and then just regain it all right after hitting goal! But just the other day I realized I've been maintaining for over a year, so even though I've had my ups and downs, it really hasn't been that hard and I probably won't be ballooning back to 200+ anytime soon.

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Me too! I had a wardrobe that covered basically 18W to 26W. I have now donated pretty much everything except for the 18Ws! I am looking forward to buying more new clothes! In the past, i would have boxed it up saved the bigger sizes. I really am believing in this!

As I reduce in size, I'm getting rid of my fat clothes and my closet is emptying out. I've never done that before because I was never sure if I would need them again. I know, now, that they are a thing of the past..

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I am 14 months post surgery and am now starting to "see" myself as a normal person. I got rid of all of my fat clothes, and continue to weed things out of my closet to donate that no longer fit (even though I wore them not long ago).

When I buy something now in a 12P (suits) or 10P (jeans) or medium petite (blouses) I have this fear as I am trying it on that it won't fit. They do fit and that reinforces to me I am this size.

I am also learning how to use my tool in a maintenance mode. I took a break from losing for a while before losing the last 7-10 pounds (I've been conducting a job search and wanted to be easy on myself). I have been maintaining my weight at a +/- 3 pound range - like normal people do.

This is real. This is forever. I am a normal sized person.

Sharon

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I've been at goal and in maintenance a little over a month and I am still getting used to it. I misstate my weight, saying 153 instead of 135, think my clothes look too small to fit me, and have a hard time realizing I can fit through smaller openings, in smaller chairs, and so forth. I've had a couple of nightmares about waking up fat.

But I think the longer I stay at goal, the more I will get used to it. I hope to be totally there in the next year. So, for me, the journey includes years of struggling, six months of prep for the operation, almost a full year to get to goal, and planning on being totally used to life at goal within 6 months to one year.

Lynda

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I think it comes on gradually. I don't seem to have a mental switch that flipped, but my mind has been gradually shifting over. I'm a year and 11 days out from surgery and changed from a tight 26/28 to a comfortable 12/14. My entire closet has been emptied and refilled (ah, yes, shopping is seriously fun now). My eating habits are light years different from before. Even though I sometimes don't recognize myself in the mirror, I definitely feel like "me" now--it's like the previous fat woman wasn't really "me." I think of her occasionally, but not often--there's not a lot about her that I miss, honestly, and this life is so much better. I feel better, I look better, my relationships are better, work is better, sex is better, shopping is better, sleeping is better--heck--EVERYTHING is better, and I thought I had it pretty good before!

My husband is also a sleever, and we have some pictures up in our kitchen that we are never taking down--it's us at our highest weights, and we look old and tired (and fat, of course). I look at those pictures every day, and I really don't remember being that woman. I don't remember my husband being that man, even though when he was sleeved, it was hard for me to reconcile his new slimmer self with the man I knew. It's so weird, like we were always there, but we had to get rid of the fat suits in order to fully be ourselves.

I don't know how long it's going to take, but I'm already most of the way there, I think. And I love being normal-sized--people actually say I'm "slender" and "elegant" now, which is because I'm tall, of course, but also because I'M NOT FAT ANY MORE. Miracle of miracles!!!

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The same thing for me. I can tell I have lost weigh because I am down clothing sizes, but I do not see it. I asked my husband to pick a lady out in the restaurant today, one that was my size now. So that I could try and wrap my mind around the whole weight loss thing.

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It's funny about the sliding scale of clothes sizes, when we were at our biggest it seems like we all had a varitey of sizes in our closets, reflecting past weight losses and gains. Now, I still have a variety of sizes but that is because of the schizophrenia of sizing within the clothing industry. Also, old habits die hard, and when I am at Goodwill and I see a pair of trousers in a size 8 or a pencil skirt in a size 6, and I am able to pour myself into them, I can't help but get them because it is just so tantalizing. So right now I am in a comfortable 14 pants, or 12, one pair of perfectly snug Levi's in a size 10, but I have pants and skirts and dresses in sizes 6-10, hoping, hoping... =)

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Sunday night I watched a program on tv "my 600 pound body" something like that.

Each loser on the gastric bypass ( 7 years later ) said they still see the fat person in the mirror. Do any of you see this when you look in the mirror?

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I'm still in dreamland! I feel as if I am living the most wonderful dream ever!! I don't how long it will take my brain to accept that I've lost 55 lbs, I've went from a 24 to an 18...and I look & feel fabulous!!! This is the most wonderful time in my life, I am enjoying it...but taking it one day at a time!

Sent from my iPhone using VST

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    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
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