Do You Really Believe This Is Going To Work?

[Teri L 3]

Hi,

I was sleeved on 11/30/11 and I feel like I'm doing well (down 42 lbs). I'm far from perfect in my choices post surgery, which makes me feel disappointed in myself. Here's the thing tho, I don't believe this is really going to work. Am I trying to protect myself from disappointment? Or is this a form of self sabotage? Or am I trying to protect myself so I don't feel like a failure? I guess I'm hoping to hear that this is normal. I don't know. I just don't believe it is even possible that I would ever hit goal. I fear so much that I'm gonna screw this up and I keep making these arrangements in my head like if I get to 200 then that would be a success - or just get to 210 or 190. I'm 2 months out and I already sometimes feel like I'm able to eat more than maybe I should. I don't know. Maybe I should just go to bed.

Did you guys really believe this would work?

Sincerely,

Trippin' in San Francisco

[SKCUNNINGHAM 298]

Yes this really works if you practice the correct behaviors and lifestyle changes. The sleeve is a really effective tool to help you lose weight, but it can't do it by itself. It takes concentrated effort on your part to get the maximum benefit from it. Thousands of patients have proven this really works.

No, this won't work if you continue to do bad behaviors and make the wrong choices. Probably thousands of patients have proven this too - although a much smaller number than have proven it successful.

It really sounds like you need to get to a counselor ASAP and get some insight into why you are undermining your own success.

If you want to PM me to start a dialogue on what you should do and shouldn't do, I will be happy to share - I didn't want this response to be a long rant on what you should and shouldn't do - you probably know them anyway and are just choosing to not do them. .

You are 100% responsible and 100% accountable for your success or failure to lose weight with the sleeve. If you fail - it won't be "the sleeve's fault". It will be your own fault.

I really hope you change what you are doing and get some help to change whatever in your head is driving you to not do the right things.

Best of Luck to you.

Sharon

[Shoppingbeemom 31]

The fat girl in you is trying to hold on to you! My fat girl trys too. Remember to eat your protien first and you'll be too full to make bad choices. I keep pistachios as my go to snack, it has protien and is the lowest calorie nut. Best wishes

[lucill35 73]

It's interesting you posted this today as I was having these same thoughts this morning. Today is my one year surgiversary. A year ago today I had surgery in Mexico. I wanted to believe that this surgery was going to be the thing that finally worked for me but I was oh so afraid that I would be the one person who failed their sleeve. A year later and I have lost 110 lbs. I don't feel like I failed my sleeve but do know that I could have done better. After losing 100 lbs by the end of October, somehow my brain seemed to think that was it. I am still obese by BMI standards. I feel 100% better than I did last year at this time. I didn't realize how bad I felt until I felt so much better. I could be farther in my journey at this point and have done better at this point. But then there's the part of me that says "YOU LOST 110 LBS IN A YEAR!!" Holy sh*t!! The head game is still is struggle and the sleeve won't change that. I need to get my head in the game and move on. I have 40 lbs to go to reach my goal and I know what I need to do to get there. It's just a matter of doing it. I'm disappointed in myself for not losing it all in a year but on the other hand, "what a difference a year makes." Clearly I'm conflicted and I'm rambling. I just wanted to say that like you said, fear that it won't work are pretty normal. If you do the work, the sleeve will work! Best of luck to you!!

[Lissa 2,631]

Lucill, You have the answer right in your signature line:

You're braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think...

This journey requires us to believe in ourselves and to do the work required to get there, but OH, what a great feeling to finally start being successful. I'm 5 months post-op tomorrow and I've lost 81 pounds, so I'm halfway to goal. Yes, It's been pretty easy so far, but I do have to eat right and exercise to keep losing. I am amazed every day at my improved energy level and ability to move, bend, twist, get up and down off the floor, walk up and down stairs, in short...I have a new life and a new outlook on it.

Yeah, sometimes I wonder if I'll ever actually reach my goal, but that thought soon flees when I think about how far I've come in only 5 months. Just before surgery, I was so sick and out of shape that I could barely walk from my front door to my car. Now I walk 2+ miles on the treadmill at a time, ride 6-8 miles on the exercise bike, lift weights, walk the length of the mall FOR FUN and, in general, am much more active! So, while I still sometimes wonder if I'll get to my goal weight, I have hope that it will happen. To misquote an 80's song: My future's so bright, I gotta wear shades![/font]

Teri, you've lost 42 pounds in two months and Lucill has lost 111 pounds in a year. Those are AMAZING numbers and they show that both of you are rocking your sleeves! Even if neither of you believe it, *I* have faith that you will both reach your goals.

Good luck!! :smile1:

[MegInNOLA 531]

Yeah, it can work. I've lost 115 pounds so far (1 pound to goal); surgery was April 18, 2011. As the others have said, it's a matter of doing what you know you're supposed to do--and you don't have to have the strength or the willpower to do it all alone. You have very important tools now to help you succeed--your sleeve and us!! Since you were sleeved in November, you've probably lost a good chunk of weight already; are you starting to worry if that's going to slow down or stop? It will eventually, but if you follow the advice of your physician and your eating/exercise plans, you'll be able to maximize your loss. Most importantly, this isn't a race. You've got the whole rest of your life to take care of your health, and you'll be around longer with losing weight--plus the quality of your life is going to be so much better without that weight!

Hugs to you. Keep us posted!

[LilMissDiva Irene 3,281]

Hi,

I was sleeved on 11/30/11 and I feel like I'm doing well (down 42 lbs). I'm far from perfect in my choices post surgery, which makes me feel disappointed in myself. Here's the thing tho, I don't believe this is really going to work. Am I trying to protect myself from disappointment? Or is this a form of self sabotage? Or am I trying to protect myself so I don't feel like a failure? I guess I'm hoping to hear that this is normal. I don't know. I just don't believe it is even possible that I would ever hit goal. I fear so much that I'm gonna screw this up and I keep making these arrangements in my head like if I get to 200 then that would be a success - or just get to 210 or 190. I'm 2 months out and I already sometimes feel like I'm able to eat more than maybe I should. I don't know. Maybe I should just go to bed.

Did you guys really believe this would work?

Sincerely,

Trippin' in San Francisco

Good morning,

Let me be real this morning. If you feel disappointed in anything you are doing in your journey, then you ARE setting yourself up for a lot more disappointment. No one on this Earth is perfect. Not me, not you, not Jenny down the street that you look at every day and wish you had her body... If you make a "mistake" just forget about it and move on. Holding on to negativity will only breed more negativity.

Another thing, our attitude and outlook will never be wrong. So, if you believe you're going to fail, then you will. You absolutely will have to change that attitude if you are going to succeed. I've been down and out for a long time. It took ME Six and one half years to become who I am today!! Guess what... in all those years I NEVER DOUBTED I'd be here... so therefore, I AM HERE!!!

Did I ever think this might not work? Yes!! There were moments when I caught myself disbelieving. That said, I immediately told myself to stop that! It's all insanity and one thing I was never going to be was a self proclaimed failure. It's all internal my dear, you are going to be what you make of yourself. Don't do that to yourself.

No one here has the power but YOU to call YOU a success and for YOU to really believe that. That is YOUR job.

[CowgirlJane 14,259]

You and have a similiar profile - fairly high starting BMI, and a lot to lose. I would love to get down to 160, that is my personal goal.

I totally agree with everything that everybody said, but I also have another thought. I started this journey at 308 - if I only get to 200# and can actually maintain that, it has been totally worth it even if 160# alludes me. Even now, I am more physically capable and my health is improving. I simply refuse to fall into that "all or nothing" thinking that only if I hit a certain magical number on a scale will I be a "success". That thinking has not served me well over the years and I am not playing this time.

I have set for myself a series of goals because for my brain, that works better and is less overwhelming then having to think about losing 148 pounds (from my starting weight). For me, that number is just... awful.... it carries some emotional baggage I guess that would bring me down if I spent to much time thinking about it.

I am viewing the fact that I am on the journey and making the most of it as my success for right now. I was discouraged because the scale is moving slow right now, but I saw a friend yesterday that hasn't seen me in 2 weeks and she was shocked - she said I looked thinner in two weeks even though the scale only gave me a couple of pounds. I keep celebrating the small victories rather then being crushed by the possibility of failure or the enormity of the task.

[Ms skinniness 3,003]

Well said LilMissDiva! We are in charge of our destiny. We can sit and wallow in our old negative messages we bought from other people's messages about who we our, or we can take charge, and plow onward into new exciting territory. We are already successes in our lives by choosing to help ourselves by having this beautiful tool added to our tool box to finally, and I mean finally, lose our unwanted lbs. It might take us just a couple of months, it might take us 6 months, it might take 12 to 18 months. But we will always have our tools to help. I love my sleeve and will always follow the rules of the sleeve. There are moments where I think that I have reached my maxium weight loss because my scale has stopped moving. Instead the inches were coming off instead. Now I don't care what the scale saids, I just want my body to continue adjusting in inches and clothes sizes. It has taken me along time (6 weeks) to experience a long stall and that didn't mean that I was a failure. I went down from a 13 jeans to a size 10 jeans and a size 8 in slacks. Ummmmm, that is what I've been working towards anyways.

Yes, I can be my own worst enemy! I am chosing to be my best supporter now and to keep moving forward. Don't let your negative thoughts influence who you our. The negative thoughts are from the past diets that failed you, but they were really stupid diets that no one could continue on for a life time anyways. The sleeve is life time! Eat less. Be happy. Be thankful for what we have.

YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY! :girl_hug: :kiss: :kiss: :kiss:

[Teri L 3]

Thank you all for your support. I like the advice to be my own best supporter and keep moving forward. I think I tend to dwell on my *mistakes* and I need to redirect to focus on my accomplishments.

I didn't mean to imply that I"m not following the rules - I am - but I make the mistake of dwelling on any mistake I do make.

I guess I just need to keep moving forward and the trust that it will work will come because it is working. As they say the proof is in the pudding.

=)

[RosieSweetie 40]

What great posts! Thanks everyone. I think we are so used to "failing" when it comes to weight, that we sometimes can't believe that if we lose it (with the help of our sleeve), we will not regain it. For me, this is the first time I do not keep weighing myself. It is also the first time that I have religiously kept track of my Protein, carbs and calories. It is also the first time that I have religiously taken Vitamins and been exercising. I have made lifestyle changes that I intend on keeping forever. And It sure beats the old days of being obsessed with food and being embarassed and guilty about my "lack of self control" and weight. I realize I am still in the honeymoon period, but the longer I "behave correctly", the better I feel, and I want to continue this journey. Its so nice not to feel hungry constantly!