Okay let's face it, when I was 330 Lbs I'm sure the only time a man (besides my AWESOME and FAITHFUL Husband) ever looked at me was to think... Wow that girl is really big!!! Of course I didn't get any comments but I could feel it. I sure was treated a certain way by men too. They were never polite and really seemed like they didn't even want to talk to me unless they absolutely had too.

However, I've notice in the past few weeks I've been getting the "look" ALL THE TIME!! Men trying to get my attention anywhere and everywhere. Spiking up stupid and meaningless conversations and going for the "kill". However, as I point to my ring finger and tell them I am oh so married they want to know why I went and did such a silly thing as that (get married). Yes I've gotten SEVERAL comments like that. Funny huh?

Not only that, they literally go WAY out of their way to hold doors open for me and let me go first, etc...

I'm not so sure I like the attention to be honest. I mean, it's nice to know that underneath all that fat I can still be found attractive at 37 years old by men of ALL AGES I'm not kidding you. I even catch young teenage boys looking at me!! OMG!! LMAO!!! Now THAT is entertainment.

I didn't even know if I should post this here, it's very strange and I don't see this being discussed much at all, but I guess it goes with the territory. Anyway, I wonder if I got so large because I felt comfortable in my big cocoon.

Anyone else feel this way too? I feel... "naked" now.

I wonder the same thing now about my fat cocoon. I am still a ways away from having doors held open and men checking me out. But I have always wondered when I started to really put on the pounds is when I wanted to get away from people.

I get a lot of attention from men now too. I was 274 when I first got banded, weigh 192ish now. I have stopped making eye contact with men at all, it makes me so uncomfortable. I almost feel like they are making fun of me. Its weird.

I totally know what you mean. This guy stared me down today for 15 minutes while I was on the elliptical- I ended up sticking my tongue out at him and rolled my eyes (how mature, right? lol) so he would stop looking at me. So weird. I actually almost fell, #epicfail.com lol. It's weird cause you think, they wouldn't have taken a 2nd look when I was at my highest weight. I guess it's just one of those things.

It is really a strange thing... Candace that is hilarious!! I must try this sometime...

Anyway, I wonder if I got so large because I felt comfortable in my big cocoon.

Anyone else feel this way too? I feel... "naked" now.

Hey Diva...

I can understand why men (and women) take a double look... you're beautiful weight or no weight!

Your last comment struck a chord with me... I am thinking very similar, I sometimes wonder if my head and body are at war with each other... before, (and now) I was realy bubbly... got a lot of attention 'cos of my humour... I never even thought it would be any other form of attention.

As I get smaller, yes there is a difference, and sometimes I don't like it either!!

Weird how the mind works... it is such a powerful tool...

I def get more attention from guys now... Doors being opened, approached at the gym, I think I mentioned a while ago that I ran into my ex-husband that I hadn't seen in 25 years and he and a friend totally checked me out. Guys stop me and start small talk, not always a "hit" but just friendly too... I like it, but a small pissed off voice in the back of my head says "Hey! I was always worth talking too!" I have had guys tell me I am beautiful... remember I am 58! I thought these days were over... guess not! I plan on enjoying it while I can (without pissing off my hubby of course!)

I also get stared at all the time, but no one ever tries to talk to me, thankfully. I'm not very approachable outside of work situations (where I have to be), from what I've been told.

Great topic starter, Diva!

I was always a very well proportioned heavy person and have been blessed with an hourglass shape so even at only halfway to goal the looks and conversations are starting to come. I actually believe I gained the weight back the last time I lost a bunch (like most of us, I lost and gained multiple times) because I was getting "noticed" and wasn't yet okay with it. I think I definitely ate myself into a happy little cocoon and when I lost the weight I just felt akward and weird when men noticed me.

This time around I remembered that issue and employed a therapist to get okay with being noticed before it freaked me out again. I still find it odd that I was so adverse to being noticed by men- I've had no sexual trauma, abuse, etc. in my life. Here's my issue: my sister was always considered the "pretty one" (she's 5'11" and 130 lbs.) while I was the "smart one". My therapist believes I somehow got it into my head that thin women are not smart. Therefore, losing all the weight threatened how I most identified myself. I think she's right. Anyway, I shared all that because I think it's fascinating how such small things lead us to hang on to the comfort of our former size.

And, don't even get me started on how losing weight has changed how I'm viewed/treated in the workplace.

Amanda

Great topic starter, Diva!

I was always a very well proportioned heavy person and have been blessed with an hourglass shape so even at only halfway to goal the looks and conversations are starting to come. I actually believe I gained the weight back the last time I lost a bunch (like most of us, I lost and gained multiple times) because I was getting "noticed" and wasn't yet okay with it. I think I definitely ate myself into a happy little cocoon and when I lost the weight I just felt akward and weird when men noticed me.

This time around I remembered that issue and employed a therapist to get okay with being noticed before it freaked me out again. I still find it odd that I was so adverse to being noticed by men- I've had no sexual trauma, abuse, etc. in my life. Here's my issue: my sister was always considered the "pretty one" (she's 5'11" and 130 lbs.) while I was the "smart one". My therapist believes I somehow got it into my head that thin women are not smart. Therefore, losing all the weight threatened how I most identified myself. I think she's right. Anyway, I shared all that because I think it's fascinating how such small things lead us to hang on to the comfort of our former size.

And, don't even get me started on how losing weight has changed how I'm viewed/treated in the workplace.

Amanda

Excellent post!! You get it... I guess for real we are just going to have to learn to live with it now because we did was totally permanent and I know it would be incredibly difficult for me to gain my weight back (speaking only for myself of course). I cannot eat bad too much, it makes me physically ill. LOL!!

The other day at the supermarket I realised this older man staring at me, then I bumped into him a few mor times while I was shopping. After that he was in front of me at the check out and didn't stop staring, at me, mostly at my boobs (I had a low cut top on) it was terrifying. I went home after that and changed tops straight away, I can usually handle attention from men (not that I get much) but this was disturbing.

(It was the only check out open and by the time I realised I was behind him it was too late)

I have T and A (go do a search on youtube dance 10 looks 3 from a chorus line ) when fat so I get the looks and comments regardless especially from black guys I'm NOT looking forward to any more attention.

I have T and A (go do a search on youtube dance 10 looks 3 from a chorus line ) when fat so I get the looks and comments regardless especially from black guys I'm NOT looking forward to any more attention.

I have T and A too!! I had to warn my hubby that they may go bye bye.... I think I will miss T the most and he will miss A

I have T and A too!! I had to warn my hubby that they may go bye bye.... I think I will miss T the most and he will miss A

I don't want to lose my T either!!! My Bio Mom had RnY in the 90's she went from an F cup to an A cup. I don't want an A CUP!!!!! I loved my Full C Small D's when I was thinner...hoping I get to keep them about that size.

.

This time around I remembered that issue and employed a therapist to get okay with being noticed before it freaked me out again. I still find it odd that I was so adverse to being noticed by men- I've had no sexual trauma, abuse, etc. in my life. Here's my issue: my sister was always considered the "pretty one" (she's 5'11" and 130 lbs.) while I was the "smart one". My therapist believes I somehow got it into my head that thin women are not smart. Therefore, losing all the weight threatened how I most identified myself. I think she's right. Anyway, I shared all that because I think it's fascinating how such small things lead us to hang on to the comfort of our former size.

And, don't even get me started on how losing weight has changed how I'm viewed/treated in the workplace.

Amanda

Amanda, I am completely and utterly with you in this, as this mindset was very much alive and kicking in my youth!! Perhaps I need to focus on this too... thanks for sharing x