Day 24: Dying to be thin?

[crosswind 134]

What about Drew Carey? he's claiming the diet and exercise route too.

Yeah, not sure I'm buying it. Could be another case of "Pilates and Portion Control".

[feedyoureye 3,087]

. I'm 46. I keep thinking about my ex-husband -- the one who I was married to when I got to Mexicali but our divorce was finalized the day of my surgery. He was *such* an asshole to me about my weight. He used to fly into rages going -- " There's a RIGHT way to eat and a WRONG way to eat"

and I finally decided I couldn't live with him because he'd lose his mind if I ate an extra bagel.

We still talk a lot on the phone. I was actually talking to him in Mexicali and he didn't know I was there. I talked to him every day before and after surgery and he still doesn't know. I keep thinking about it because the game with him was actually to make me feel like shit about myself every single day of my life and if it wasn't being overweight it was going to be something else. He just needed to be superior, especially over his wife. Anyway, I keep being tempted to tell him but I think it would just be one more thing I did absolutely and totally wrong in his opinion. It's so weird that you care so much about what people who secretly hate you think. Like anything is going to change their mind about you.

Haha! I just ran into my Ex... he left me for another woman 25 years ago, and I hadn't seen him in all those years... I was so in love with him, and it took me a couple of years of self therapy and hard work to grow out of that mess... anyway, I was stunned to see him. My little mind was dog paddling between "its him!" and "it can't be him, its someone else that I used to know a long time ago...", then I finally realized that it was him. ...and he was checking me out...I was just coming out of my Tango lesson, and was actually dressed up kind of cute, and after I went home, all I could think of was "I am SO freaking glad that I have lost 50 pounds!" Its a girl thang.

[crosswind 134]

Haha! I just ran into my Ex... he left me for another woman 25 years ago, and I hadn't seen him in all those years... I was so in love with him, and it took me a couple of years of self therapy and hard work to grow out of that mess... anyway, I was stunned to see him. My little mind was dog paddling between "its him!" and "it can't be him, its someone else that I used to know a long time ago...", then I finally realized that it was him. ...and he was checking me out...I was just coming out of my Tango lesson, and was actually dressed up kind of cute, and after I went home, all I could think of was "I am SO freaking glad that I have lost 50 pounds!" Its a girl thang.

Ha.

Awesome.

[meggiep 57]

Have any celebs actually had the sleeve? Wouldnt it be good if someone high profile could educate about it?

That's the thing- if just one celebrity would come out and say it is NOT an easy way out- it is a hard road that takes a tremendous amount of courage- it could make a huge difference. In stead we have Star Jones deny deny denying until forced to admit....that was the opposite of courage.

OK now Mama Meggie wants to take a gang of VST peeps and go to pay a little visit to the creep that hurt Crosswind so we can hurt him - the ones of us who are pre-surgery can all do a full court press on him... and then keep on going to the creeps that hurt any of you.

[crosswind 134]

That's the thing- if just one celebrity would come out and say it is NOT an easy way out- it is a hard road that takes a tremendous amount of courage- it could make a huge difference. In stead we have Star Jones deny deny denying until forced to admit....that was the opposite of courage.

OK now Mama Meggie wants to take a gang of VST peeps and go to pay a little visit to the creep that hurt Crosswind so we can hurt him - the ones of us who are pre-surgery can all do a full court press on him... and then keep on going to the creeps that hurt any of you.

. Meggie I was watching one of your vlogs and I think you were talking about your SO. Y'all are so lucky you have supportive, loving spouses. It makes such a difference, or so I can only imagine....

[meggiep 57]

. Meggie I was watching one of your vlogs and I think you were talking about your SO. Y'all are so lucky you have supportive, loving spouses. It makes such a difference, or so I can only imagine....

My darling is so wonderful- he has been through it with me- all my surgeries and my slowly becoming a recluse living in pain. He treats me like a goddess. He came home from costco with a magic bullet for me...and on the other extreme is out today picking up treats for me in these last days of eating before my liquids.

Now mind you he is my third husband! I had the young early four year marriage, the middle 16 year marriage that gave me my darling son, and now the threes a charm soul mate found at age 48.

I find nothing more reprehensible than a man who emotionally abuses a woman by trying to demean and belittle her. Because you start believing him!

I have a feeling this surgery is going to allow you to see the Goddess you are. And you will find someone worthy of you. I know it can happen, it happened to me.

And btw I wrote one mean personals ad- he was hooked. I will have to dredge it up and post it ;-P It was the ad AND my not that small thigh in the jeans I was wering in my profile pic. I was size 16 and very fit when I met him and would be happy just to have that back....

[meggiep 57]

. Meggie I was watching one of your vlogs and I think you were talking about your SO. Y'all are so lucky you have supportive, loving spouses. It makes such a difference, or so I can only imagine....

My darling is so wonderful- he has been through it with me- all my surgeries and my slowly becoming a recluse living in pain. He treats me like a goddess. He came home from costco with a magic bullet for me...and on the other extreme is out today picking up treats for me in these last days of eating before my liquids.

Now mind you he is my third husband! I had the young early four year marriage, the middle 16 year marriage that gave me my darling son, and now the threes a charm soul mate found at age 48.

I find nothing more reprehensible than a man who emotionally abuses a woman by trying to demean and belittle her. Because you start believing him!

I have a feeling this surgery is going to allow you to see the Goddess you are. And you will find someone worthy of you. I know it can happen, it happened to me.

And btw I wrote one mean personals ad- he was hooked. I will have to dredge it up and post it ;-P It was the ad AND my not that small thigh in the jeans I was wearing in my profile pic. I was size 16 and very fit when I met him and would be happy just to have that back....

[crosswind 134]

My darling is so wonderful- he has been through it with me- all my surgeries and my slowly becoming a recluse living in pain. He treats me like a goddess. He came home from costco with a magic bullet for me...and on the other extreme is out today picking up treats for me in these last days of eating before my liquids.

Now mind you he is my third husband! I had the young early four year marriage, the middle 16 year marriage that gave me my darling son, and now the threes a charm soul mate found at age 48.

I find nothing more reprehensible than a man who emotionally abuses a woman by trying to demean and belittle her. Because you start believing him!

I have a feeling this surgery is going to allow you to see the Goddess you are. And you will find someone worthy of you. I know it can happen, it happened to me.

And btw I wrote one mean personals ad- he was hooked. I will have to dredge it up and post it ;-P It was the ad AND my not that small thigh in the jeans I was wearing in my profile pic. I was size 16 and very fit when I met him and would be happy just to have that back....

. Lucky girl. Ask him if he has a brother.

Or...you know, is the dad still alive?

[fatBgone 6]

I hoping for " second times a charm!" I definitely need to see that personal ad!!!

[Oregondaisy 2,019]

Great thread.

I have been hanging out with my ex husband. He was my h.s. sweetheart and I married him at 19 and left him at 21. We reconnected last summer.

I've never told him I had surgery. It's kind of funny . We eat together all the time. His mom died and he's convinced it was cause she had gastric

bypass years ago. I am not about to defend this WLS to anyone.

[meggiep 57]

I hoping for " second times a charm!" I definitely need to see that personal ad!!!

My husbznd is looking for the digital version of it, and if he can't find it, will photograph the candy wrapper so I can share it with you. What wrapper? For our wedding favors we gave a one pound bar of chocolate from Trader Joe's (only 40 guests, or we could not have possibly afforded it!)- we made our own wrappers- on the front a collage of photos of us,my son, our cats etc. - and on the back we had my ad and our first few emails starting when he answered my ad and some others as we went back and forth before we finally met the next afternoon.

[fatBgone 6]

My husbznd is looking for the digital version of it, and if he can't find it, will photograph the candy wrapper so I can share it with you. What wrapper? For our wedding favors we gave a one pound bar of chocolate from Trader Joe's (only 40 guests, or we could not have possibly afforded it!)- we made our own wrappers- on the front a collage of photos of us,my son, our cats etc. - and on the back we had my ad and our first few emails starting when he answered my ad and some others as we went back and forth before we finally met the next afternoon.

My God, I'm pretty sure you are the most creative people I know!!!!!what a great idea.

[optimistic 0]

You know, I think you may be right about age/experience being a positive factor here. I am 59, and agree with you that I don't care a rat's ass what other people think. I told a (heavy) woman in Macy's shoe department recently that I was having WLS, just because I think its healthy to share the knowledge. If it starts somebody else thinking about it, that's good. I will be sleeved next Monday, and only one friend told me how great I look now (lost 37 lbs, but still am 241), and maybe I should just continue what I'm doing. I told her I am not looking for her approval, just her support. Maybe the young just don't have the same sense of who they are the the self confidence we oldies have.

It may be my age (48) but I just haven't had any issues telling people what i've done.... I guess I frankly don't give a rats @$ what they think about it. My body, My life. Anyone who knows me knows i've been yo-yo dieting for years. So far, all I've heard is huge support and how fantastic I look.

My husband was so excited he told all his friends and i had no issues.... no different than any of them "buying their wifes/girlsfriends boob jobs..." sort of the male right of passage. He was very excited that I was going to try my best to get my old pre age 35 body back. We are starting to feel like we are dating again.... it's not only been great for my physical health but my overall mental well being.

Also, If I can help (by telling on person my story) save their health or lessen the stigma than I feel like I've made a difference. And in the end.... that's all its about. Making a difference. Not exactly as glamorous as a community garden or fund raising for breast cancer but we all have different callings and you never know who's life you may touch by sharing your story (struggles and successes).

[ybnormal 21]

I feel totally differently about wls. Years ago I had horrible pain that woke me up and kept me up every night, all night. Finally figured out it was my gallbladder. I had surgery and had it removed, problem solved. Right now my weight is the problem so WHY WOULDN'T I fix it if I could? It IS hurting me physically, it's taking its toll on my health, my emotions and my life. There's a problem, so I'll fix it. Keep in mind, I'm bonkers, so this mindset may not work for everyone lol

Renee`