Scared to be skinny

[lisabug 10]

So I am still at the approval stage of VSG. I am 33 yr old mother of 2 beautiful girls and married to the love of my life. I have been overweight since I was a teenager and have been up and down since then. I had originally gone to the seminar planning on doing lap band surgery. I had not really heard about VSG until that day. I left the seminar knowing that the sleeve was what I wanted and the lap band was definitely not right for me. I met with my surgeon and he thinks I am a great canidate for the sleeve. I have done a ton of research since then and I am positive this is what I want.

That being said I still have fears. I am scared that I will not get approved. I am terrified that I will fail with this also. Most of all I do no know what it is like to be thin. I am also scared to be hopeful that I could lose weight and keep it off. Also will I have excess skin on my arms and legs. I am expecting the tummy to have excess skin especialy where I have developed the baby pooch after my last child.

I was keeping it pretty quiet that I was planning on doing WLS. I have recently told my boss and a few of my co-workers. My overweight friends are excited for me. My thin friends keep offering to diet with me or go to the gym instead of doing the surgery. My husband has been supportive, but keeps hearing horror stories about bypass surgery. I keep telling him that this is competely different surgery. I know there are still risks. I still have not told my dad and I do not plan to until after the surgery.

Sorry to be so long winded, but it is nice to talk to people that have been through this or are going through this too.

I am so excited to see so many people doing well after this surgery.

[Papillon 7]

take your husband with you to an information session, It will give him a chance t0 hear about the differences between surgeries. I started out looking into the lapband myself but after hearing about some of the problems a lot of patients had with the band eroding or scaring their stomach I decided the sleeve was the right surgery for me. I was just sleeved yesterday and I admit as the day came closer I was feeling anxious. Thought about grabbing my bags and running haha. I have no regrets, I decided they were not welcome. Bring on this new life!! My surgeon was wonderful and has taken excellent care of my husband and I. I will sing it from the rafters hehe. : )

p.s. we have UHC and the entire approval process took almost a year. 6 months of weigh-ins, sleep study, psychiatric consult,...ect It felt like forever but you will get there!

[DougNichols 124]

You don't HAVE to be thin, you can still be overweight, just not massively obese.

Your risk for heart disease, cancer and all sorts of bad things are higher when you are severely overweight. Lowering yourself down to just "slightly overweight" will be so much healthier for your body.

[mp8btpc 32]

You don't HAVE to be thin, you can still be overweight, just not massively obese.

Your risk for heart disease, cancer and all sorts of bad things are higher when you are severely overweight. Lowering yourself down to just "slightly overweight" will be so much healthier for your body.

Hehe that is true!

I also started off looking at lap band on the lapbandtalk forums and some people that were posting over there mentioned the sleeve and I hopped on over here and did a ton of research here and on the net. I decided pretty swiftly that with all the possible ongoing complications with the band that this surgery would work much better for me.

I am about 5 weeks out (friday) and I am down over 20 pounds. I have my official 2 week weigh a week from this friday then I will update my ticker. That is pretty good because I am a lower BMI person and we tend to lose slower.

I am adjusting quickly. Just do your research, print some things out for your hubby and have him attend your informational meetings. Maybe he will be less worried.

Congrats on your decision to move forward with something like this and welcome to the boards.

[Miss Lili 0]

hi! I hear ya girl... I have no idea what it is to be thin either!

I, as many others started out looking into the band and then changed my mind. I researched (obsessively!) and I am sure it it the best for me too!

I have always been overweight.. even as an athlete (yup.. training 25 hours a week) I was still the biggest in the team. As I look at pictures now, I see that I was *normal*..but back then I was still considered overweight.

I am soooooooo ready for this. 2 of my new sleeve friends have had theirs done in the past month, and they are doing great! I feel like I know what i am getting into, know how I might feel, etc...

the one thing I do not know, and can not imagine, is being thin....I suppose that it is because I have been big for a long time. I own absolutly nothing that does not fit me (gave up that game a long time ago!), and I have no fairly recent memory of me being smaller.

And you are right, old habits die hard eh? The fear of failure is still present. As I poured over the zillions of stories, blogs, videos, pictures... the excitment is there, and yet that little voice says ``it works for others, but maybe not me``...

So I have tried to keep positive, surrond myself with positive people, created a support group just for me..to hold myself accountable...(you see..fear of failure!)...

I agree with the above posts, bring your hubby to a meeting! There are way too many success stories out there.. and even if there are risks (as any surgery), the greater risk is not being healthy!

ok..enough babble...

good luck!!! WE CAN DO THIS!!!!

[lamsunshine 2]

Welcome Lisabug. I think we all had those same feelings, when we started on our sleeve journey. Keep us posted on your journey. I just got my sleeve two weeks ago, and I can tell you personally I would do it all over again if I had to.

[AJW 18]

Don't be scared. You will succeed with this surgery. I am 11 mos. post-op and lost more than 100% of my excess weight. I am now skinny, and even though I thought I'd have more loose skin, it's contracted pretty well for someone of my age (61) so you'll be surprised at how your body can suck back the skin. And if you need loose skin taken off after you're all done losing, that can be done in Mexico with Dr. Bello. IDK who your surgeon will be, but I'll assume this is being done in the USA. I went to Dr. Aceves in Mexicali, who is excellent, and the cosmetic doctor he refers to is Manual Bello, MD, who operates out of the same private hospital as Dr. Aceves. Where there is a will, there is a way, is my fav saying. I wish you the best. If you don't get ins. approval for sleeve surgery, my best advice would be to self-pay and go see Dr. Aceves. I don't work for him and have no association, he's just a great guy and doctor. Keep coming back here for more support on your journey.:biggrin0:

[peatie 4]

I have all the same fears as you... you are not alone in thinking this is another gimmick that we're willing to go thru to see if it works. It works. it's proven. We just need to change our mindset and WORK with the sleeve, rather than against it.

I'm deathly afraid that i'll get lax after a year or two and revert back to 'old' eating habits. We are all here because WL in the past has obviously not worked. I too am afraid of being 'thin' only to find out my Dr wants me to lose less weight than I had envisioned because it's a 'more realistic' weight to manage for years and years.

Don't put so much pressure on yourself to 'be a certain way' or look a certain way. Just look at being a HEALTHIER you... that's all anyone can ask.

Good Luck!!

[AJW 18]

Hi April..

My name's April, too.

Here's the deal with VSG: you won't care about food after this surgery, so there is NO slipping back into old habits. You will lose the HABIT after the surgery. However, it's always a good thing to be evaluated by a food shrink, aka nutritionist, so you won't cross-adict to something else, like for instance, alcohol or drugs. Because after this surgery, you really won't care about food anymore, so if food is your crutch now, you'll have to wean yourself off the crutch or find a more healthy crutch - like exercise - so you're doing something good for yourself, because food will become something you simply don't care about any longer. It won't taste the same and you'll lose the Ghrelin so you won't feel hungry basically at all. I know it sounds too good to be true, but it is. If you're not sure what Ghrelin is, click on the word to know more.

I have all the same fears as you... you are not alone in thinking this is another gimmick that we're willing to go thru to see if it works. It works. it's proven. We just need to change our mindset and WORK with the sleeve, rather than against it.

I'm deathly afraid that i'll get lax after a year or two and revert back to 'old' eating habits. We are all here because WL in the past has obviously not worked. I too am afraid of being 'thin' only to find out my Dr wants me to lose less weight than I had envisioned because it's a 'more realistic' weight to manage for years and years.

Don't put so much pressure on yourself to 'be a certain way' or look a certain way. Just look at being a HEALTHIER you... that's all anyone can ask.

Good Luck!!

[teh ericka 1]

I have that weird "scared to be skinny" thing too! I totally thought I was just being ridiculous, but it's nice to know I'm not alone. I've been overweight my entire life too-- in fact, I was just thinking today that I haven't been under 200lbs since I was 12 yrs. old. I have NO IDEA what it's like to... well... take up less space, lol.

The weirdest thing is I don't even know where I'm going to shop. I've gotten SO GOOD at finding cute plus size resources, I have no idea where all the unique "skinny girl" stuff is. And then how will I know what size I am? It'll be a trip, for sure.

I think overall I'm just afraid to be a different person somehow. I know there will be a ton of changes made, but being overweight has really become a part of who I am... and I have no idea how that'll change from this point on.

[Eureka-C 20]

I am also terrified of becoming skinny. I wonder how it will change how people treat me. The smallest I have ever been is a 12 at age 15. I remember hating shopping in the womens department when I was in elementary school because I wanted to wear cute kids clothes. Other than those three years in high school I have been plus size. I can't even imagine myself any other way. It is so much a part of my identity now. But, I really want to be thin.

[AJW 18]

Then come on and JOIN us.........thin people. It's a trip and a half.:001_tt1:

I am also terrified of becoming skinny. I wonder how it will change how people treat me. The smallest I have ever been is a 12 at age 15. I remember hating shopping in the womens department when I was in elementary school because I wanted to wear cute kids clothes. Other than those three years in high school I have been plus size. I can't even imagine myself any other way. It is so much a part of my identity now. But, I really want to be thin.

[Fleur de lis 2]

So I am still at the approval stage of VSG. I am 33 yr old mother of 2 beautiful girls and married to the love of my life. I have been overweight since I was a teenager and have been up and down since then. I had originally gone to the seminar planning on doing lap band surgery. I had not really heard about VSG until that day. I left the seminar knowing that the sleeve was what I wanted and the lap band was definitely not right for me. I met with my surgeon and he thinks I am a great canidate for the sleeve. I have done a ton of research since then and I am positive this is what I want.

That being said I still have fears. I am scared that I will not get approved. I am terrified that I will fail with this also. Most of all I do no know what it is like to be thin. I am also scared to be hopeful that I could lose weight and keep it off. Also will I have excess skin on my arms and legs. I am expecting the tummy to have excess skin especialy where I have developed the baby pooch after my last child.

I was keeping it pretty quiet that I was planning on doing WLS. I have recently told my boss and a few of my co-workers. My overweight friends are excited for me. My thin friends keep offering to diet with me or go to the gym instead of doing the surgery. My husband has been supportive, but keeps hearing horror stories about bypass surgery. I keep telling him that this is competely different surgery. I know there are still risks. I still have not told my dad and I do not plan to until after the surgery.

Sorry to be so long winded, but it is nice to talk to people that have been through this or are going through this too.

I am so excited to see so many people doing well after this surgery.

I understand exactly how you feel. Although I haven't had the surgery yet (I will on 9/27) so I can't really provide a solution of working through these issues, but it's nice to know we're not alone. When I began this process, I told me mother over and over how I'm afraid I will fail at this and put the weight back on. I haven't been skinny since the 3rd grade so I have no clue what it's going to be like. I, too, haven't told my father. A few years ago, my mother took out a loan to pay for gastric bypass but my father convinced her that all these horrible things would happen a the result of the surgery, so she backed down and took her money away. This time, he is being left out the loop completely. I probably wouldn't ever tell him, but I'm getting the procedure done in Jacksonville, where they live. So when I leave on Monday morning to go to the hospital and he wakes up to my car being at his house but I'm not there, he's going to start freaking out and calling me. At this point we've decided to call him once I go into surgery.

Good luck to you!

[Globetrotter 1,340]

Then come on and JOIN us.........thin people. It's a trip and a half.

What's it like April? What does it feel like to walk into a regular store and be able to try on regular clothes? What does it feel like to not be embarrassed in a situation where your size will obviously be a factor? Airplane seats, shopping at the Gap ... what does it feel like to be included in all these things? I too only had 4 years of participation in American womanhood during high school before I ballooned. Even though I was fit and shapely in those years, even then I still gained 10 pounds a year, going from 115 to 145. I had one single pleasurable shopping experience in my life, when I was 16 and a size 8 juniors and my Mom took me shopping at The Limited. I remember how strong I felt and ... accepted, and worth something. Worth the effort and expense of dressing my body well in good quality clothes.

[lisabug 10]

Thanks everyone. I have tried to get my husband to go to a meeting, but something has always come up. I think he is also scared that I will not feel the same about him after I lose weight. It baffles me. I just want to be healthy and more active with my girls. I am looking forward to have more energy to be a fun mom again. I weigh more now than when I was pregnant. I think it is funny because I never thought of myself as obese just a liitle fluffy. I would like for my husband to have the surgery too, but that is decision that he will have to make on his own.