Hard Time With Food

[Lisanne 5]

My diet has been off track for many months now and my weight loss (or lack thereof) really reflects that.

In my head, I know what I need to do in order to lose the weight...but I cant get my body to do what I want.

I still am able to eat too much, not nearly what I ate pre-surgery, of course....but still alot, nonetheless. Its really depressing. Ive been thinking about asking my doctor for an appetite suppressant, except that they have never worked before. I crave food and get so hungry sometimes. I get full pretty fast, but Im taking in too many carbs and calories. My food addiction has never been lessened by WLS. I always thought this was the "miracle cure". Wow, was I wrong about that. That shows how naive I was, but I was just so convinced and so hopeful...not to mention it was my last chance at living.

Now, Im struggling and its my own fault, but still cant seem to work it out. I feel so guilty and ashamed over my inability to curb my appetite and effect change over my body. Theres been many times over the course of this journey that I have felt that I have wasted my chance and ruined my Sleeve.....I know thats not really the case. My Sleeve is functioning fine and still limits my intake by alot....but theres still the appetite and cravings for "bad foods".

I guess thats my vent for the day.. Any suggestions that I can actually follow? lol

[Oregondaisy 2,019]

Get your vit. D level checked. There is a link under the Vitamin section of the board. If you have low vit D. it caues sugar cravings. I just got mine back. I have been taking extra since I found that out and mine is still low. I have to take even more.

Besides that, stick to no snacking in between meals. When I force myself to do that, I do so much better.

[Ruthi 60]

Have you tried the 5 day pouch test thing? I understand where you are coming from. I would have loved for this to have been the miracle cure. I hate exercising. Besides this is a tool, right? LOL #$%^&*&^^%$$# expensive tool. If I spent that much for screw driver, it had better do the work by itself, right? But...I would still have to choose the screw I would use it on and the speed of the job, so there you go, you still have the controls. Good luck to you and know we are here to support you.

[carolnphx 16]

Lisa, so sorry you are struggling. Do you have family to occupy your time/mind. I think I remember a post where you stated you took your dtr swimming. If I am right on remembering, maybe you could do activities with her to get mind occupied and off food. What about hobbies. I know I can lose a day here at the computer.

Keep a bottle of Water near, maybe Protein drinks, and I use Jerky and raw veggies too for the chewing factor.

I also suggest getting the "bad foods for you at this time" out of the house. If it isn't there you can't eat it. I know my husband baked a peach cobbler and I definitely helped him with that and I don't even like sweets. I cannot have things that I am tempted by in the house. I also agree with Ruthi. I have not used it but I know allot of people mention they use the 5-Day Diet. Maybe that would help get the carb craves out of your system.

You have done so well. I know you can get back into this. Message me, if you like and we can talk. carol

[Jachut 487]

I agree with Oregon, work on one thing at a time. A simple rule like no eating between meals, without any other restrictions (you can eat what and how much you feel like) can be very effective, because its not really the fact that you decide to eat KFC for lunch that does the damage, its the nibbling you do bit by bit before and after that.

And the other thing I found with my weight loss is that I absolutely SUCK at dieting. I am really no good at it, the minute I decide I'm going to, I want to eat everything in sight. So I banned dieting forever more and decided that Portion Control was it for me and I decided to be excellent on the exercise part of the equation.

Those two things are probably what helped me the most. I can choose healthy for the most part but knowing I've got no "rules" really quiets the need to choose poorly every single time. I enjoy naughty foods when i darn well want to but I dont eat between meals and I run at least 7kms every day and that kept (and keeps) me on track.

I had to accept slower weight loss for that and perhaps now I'm having to accept not ever losing that last 10lb that would probably shift those last little lumps and bumps. I was never a star loser, so there's a price but to me, any loss was a loss.

[ALISIA 1]

My diet has been off track for many months now and my weight loss (or lack thereof) really reflects that. the track is still there for you to go back when your ready again

In my head, I know what I need to do in order to lose the weight...but I cant get my body to do what I want. the body is only a small part of most of our problems you need to get your in the right place so you can do what you want and need to do there is nothing you cant do its just an area you have to fight hard to keep strong

I still am able to eat too much, not nearly what I ate pre-surgery, of course....but still alot, nonetheless. Its really depressing. what kind of help do you get for the depression? depression effects the way the body and mind works your outlook need to line up with the wanted outcome

Ive been thinking about asking my doctor for an appetite suppressant, except that they have never worked before. I crave food and get so hungry sometimes. I get full pretty fast, but Im taking in too many carbs and calories. did you try cutting something out from your diet every week start small so you dont get overwhelmed because if your like me youll get more hungery My food addiction has never been lessened by WLS. I always thought this was the "miracle cure". Wow, was I wrong about that. That shows how naive I was, but I was just so convinced and so hopeful...not to mention it was my last chance at living. was your last chance at living its not over dont give up on your self no matter how much you want to you need your self to do what you what and need to do it wont work if your not in it

Now, Im struggling and its my own fault, but still cant seem to work it out. I feel so guilty and ashamed over my inability to curb my appetite and effect change over my body. struggle means there is still life and your fighting for it that is not a bad thing. treat everyday like it is the first day of a new health plan dont hold on to the past to beat your self up with it its there to learn from not hurt you it is like that for everyone life is trial and eror dont feel bad be proud your still working on thing not everyone is that strong.

Theres been many times over the course of this journey that I have felt that I have wasted no such thing as wasting a chace your still here with us my chance and ruined everything is fixable with timemy Sleeve.....I know thats not really the case. My Sleeve is functioning fine and still limits my intake by alot....but theres still the appetite and cravings for "bad foods". so eat a lot of good food and have bad later try planning out how much bad to good you can have like for every 5 good things i get 1 bad. try making the bad thing in a healthy way. whole grain carbs steamed or baked not fried chicken over beef keep a bowl of lectice darker the better keep it next to you drink Water eat ice the possiblilties are endless so dont give up

I guess thats my vent for the day.. Any suggestions that I can actually follow? lol

let me know any way i can help

[carolnphx 16]

Alisia, good post. carol

[Ky.hen 5]

Lisa,

We are here for you. It is just harder for some more than others. My doc. told me once along time ago to have a good talk with myself and to get mad at myself. He told me to go outside and yell and scream and stomp my feet until I got myself back in line. LOL, It's a good thing I don't have any close neighbors.

I have started to exercise and it is not my favorite thing to do. I am determined to make myself do this.

I put a big picture of my kids on my refrigator door to remind me of what I need to do.

Late at night is my worse time for wanting to snack. I have found out if I drink a chocolate protien shake I am satisfied.

Don't you have the sleeve? Have you thought about getting duodental switch. (The second part of the sleeve procedure?)

Lisa, you can do this and you know that. Instead of thinking about food do something for someone. Call an eldery or special needs person or better yet go visit them. Volunteer at a nursing home or animal shelter or where ever needed. I find if I think of doing something to help someone else it makes me feel better about myself.

Don't give up. You have come to far. Keep on posting everyday to let us know how you are doing.

Hugs, Judy

[Malaika 50]

This is a quote of WASa's that she responded to when another member was having the same/similar issues. It hit home with me - maybe it will with you too ...

Good luck with your struggle - if you believe it you can achieve it!

"I'm going to get hammered for writing this but that has never stopped me before. ;o) You know these people that eat pizza and tacos a few days after surgery and they come to the boards asking if they just messed up? You know those people that pat them on the head, tell them it's okay, and to "try" to do better tomorrow? Yeah, I'm not one of those people. I tell them to knock it off, they are risking their band and why? For a lousy taco?? Are they serious? I don't suggest they TRY to do better the next day, I tell them to DO better right now.

I think we often times don't give ourselves enough credit. We think we are weak willed and powerless over the world. That simply isn't true. We have been living a life of fat for many years. You tell me the weak willed and powerless can do that, I won't believe you. Being fat in today's society is no easy task. It's really damned hard. Yet we survive it and if we can survive that, we can survive passing up a donut. Let's face it, it is much easier to pass up a donut than it is to have to buy two airlines seats because our butts are too big for one seat. It's much easier to pass up a single donut than it is to face ourselves in the mirror of Lane Giant after realizing we are yet... a bigger size than the last time we were there. We face humiliation and embarrassment every single day just due to our size. I think sometimes we tend to get used to it and forget that humiliation and embarrassment are NOT normal and a part of life. We also pretend it does not hurt as much as it does.

I'm not trying to be a skank about this but you know, WLS is our last shot at WL. This is a big deal, we have choices and too many times we are all making the wrong ones. I don't eat a lot of junk because I don't need it. Neither do you. I disagree with those that say ANYTHING in moderation is okay. The reason I disagree is because ALL of us did not get fat because we can do moderation well. With a band or any WLS our caloric intake is cut drastically and we need every calorie for food we actually need and use. The only thing cake, Pasta, or crap food will do for your body is make it more plump.

This is a lifestyle change and a lifestyle change does not mean eating the same load of crap but just less of it, that means overhauling your diet and eating food that your body needs and does something positive for it. What "value" does chocolate cake have for your body?

So does this mean that you can never have a piece of birthday cake again? Of course not. It means that eating junk on a regular basis serves no value. We don't know what moderation is so we have to go searching for it. Moderation does not mean limiting ourselves to crap food just one time daily or one time weekly, it means more along the lines of on birthdays, special occasions. When we "plan" on eating junk weekly, what does that make our thinking? That means we are *still* planning our lives around food and poor choices. Thin people don't set out to plan on when they will eat a load of crap, they don't even think about it until the birthday party or social meeting is there staring them in the face. Yet we fatties actually plan a date and time to eat bad food. See the difference in thinking between a fat person and a normal size person?

The lifestyle change is not planning on WHEN we will have loads of crap food, lifestyle change means actually going out there and living what we claim we want. Life as a normal size person.

If you can face the humiliation of being obese in society, can you honestly sit there and tell yourself that passing up junk food is harder than being the fat girl walking into a room where being MO is socially unacceptable? I mean, I think there comes a time when we have to put things in their proper perspective and this is one of those times. Next time you want junk food get real and get honest with yourself. Get a photo of that food item and a photo of a person that is the size you want to be. Which do you want more, do you want the cake more than you want to be thin and healthy? Be verrry honest with yourself. If you prefer the cake over thin then just go for it and have the darn band removed. But I'll bet you'd rather have thin over a piece of cake when you really get honest with yourself. It's all about perspective and self awareness of what you want out of this life. We have a choice, and it IS a choice. We can be fat or we can be thin. With a band thin IS within grasp.

The thing about us fat folks is that traditional diet and exercise is too hard, we just can't do it. We cannot lose and maintain at a normal size weight. Call it a lack of self control, call it anything you want. I'll cop to it, I'll be one to stand right up there and admit that I can't do it. But with a band it is still hard but it is the kind of hard WE can do, OUR population. Losing weight with a band is the kind of hard we can do but without a band, nope... we can't do it.

Sometimes, maybe often times, maybe 20x a day when we are justifying more grazing behaviors and opening the frig to see what unnecessary food is in there, there comes a time when you just have to tell yourself no. We tell our children "no" daily. No, you can't play with razor blades in the middle of a busy street. No, you can't eat rat poison. No, you can't fail to look both ways when crossing a street. No, you can't do drugs. No, you can't go out with that drug abuser who just got out of juvvy. Sometimes we have to tell ourselves no as well.

If you are like me, not sure you are, but if you are like me I can't stop at one Frito, or one bite of this or that. For me it is all or none. If I eat white carbs I can't quit. I lose self control. If I stay away from them completely I have no problem. The more I eat the more I crave. I am a person that wanted bread so bad about 3 months after banding I actually broke into the bread crumbs I use for cooking and ate the whole can. Then I started in on dry stuffing mix. It wasn't even something that tasted good (pretty rank, actually) but I couldn't stand the carb cravings anymore. That was my moment when I realized when and how I lose self control. So I avoid those situations.

You can come over to my house right now and look through my house. You won't find any flour, Pasta, bread, Fritos, or other foods that are my triggers. There are no bread crumbs, stuffing mix, cake mixes, cookie mixes... none of it. I don't even keep it in the house. There is not a person that has ever once been in my home that even needs those foods. My husband doesn't need them and he doesn't get them if he is here. Why would your family NEED cakes, Cookies, etc? We are not punishing our family members by denying them food habits WE have, it really is okay if you don't load your cupboards full of crap your kids do not need. I think that is another mindset we have to change. I've seen people post on these very boards that they can't pass up the Cookies in the cupboard but they can't punish their children by not having cookies in the house. Since when it is a punishment to decline to feed a growing child cookies to the point you can't have a day without them in your home?

Exercise... you know, we have physical and emotional reasons for overeating. Those issues we have to overcome and find ways to deal with them. But exercise? Nahhh, we have no excuse. That is just plain lazy behavior. You don't like exercise? Neither do I. But it's like cleaning the toilet. Who DOES like to do it? We do it because we have to. It's just a responsibility. We are all great at justifying eating too much and not exercising but the reality comes down to sheer lazy behaviors. If you can't run then power walk. If you can't power walk then walk. If you can't walk then do chair exercises. We have the energy to get up and run to the frig 20 times a day yet we can't find the time nor the motivation to do the SAME walking outside and away from food. How does that work? ;o)

There are people who LOVE exercise, zog bless their little hearts! It's like a transfer addiction. They go from eating to exercising. They love it. Personally, I think they are sick and twisted human beings. I exercise but I hate it. Never have enjoyed it, not even a little. The person who invented weight resistance cannot possibly be anything but a lover of S&M. They should be shot. But you know what? It really really works. The motivation for me was not busting my butt on a treadmill when I would have much preferred doing my nails. The motivation was that the more I exercised the more weight I lost. THAT was my addiction, losing weight and getting thin. The more you lose the more motivation you get.

What if you do this, just for ONE week... one week only. Cut out ALL white carbs. Yep, you'll be climbing the walls, you'll be dealing with head hunger full force. Every single TV commercial for food will be calling your name. You'll cus and swear at me and everyone else that is around you in real time or the boards. Start exercising. Even ten minutes of brisk walking. Work up a sweat, bust your butt. Just 10 minutes. That's nothing, that is the same as a couple of TV commercials. That is about the same amount of time to read a single thread on OH. Just take 10 simple minutes and go out for a hard walk. Then you are done exercising for the day. Honestly, 10 minutes is NOTHING. We have 144 10 minute blocks in a day, it really is nothing.

Then tomorrow do 11 minutes. And yes, time it from the time your walk is a brisk one, not when you start thinking it's time to go outside for your walk. When your pace is up to brisk then start timing. Daily add a single minute to it. Push yourself to do better each day, just a single minute added.

So for a week eat what you want, don't count calories, don't count fat grams. Don't worry about calories in the least. Eat what you want but do limit WHITE carbs to 20 a day. I'm just talking for a week. Do the 10 minutes of exercise while adding one minute daily. See what that does for you. You want 20 chicken breasts? Eat them. You want zucchini, yellow squash, any other carbs except fruit? Eat them. Lots of them. Don't even count carbs from veggies. Just count white carbs and limit those drastically to 20gms daily. The idea here is not to get you into ketosis, the idea is to get you eating the right carbs. Have unlimited VEGGIE carbs. You'll poop like a champ too. ;o)

I'll bet you that you lose weight.

Then as the motivation kicks in and the stomach hunger dies down you will be able to cut those 20 chicken breasts down to 10. Then 5, then 1 daily. Understand what is head hunger and what is true stomach hunger. Just focus on white carbs and minimal exercise. I'll bet you it works.

If you can live the life and frustration as a fat person, you can do this. Being fat is MUCH harder than better food choices. Again, it's all perspective.

There, that's yer' butt kicking. ;o) Just remember, you CAN do this, you have survived much much harder as a fat person and you have survived a life that is no walk in the park. If you can survive fat life you can easily survive the above plan for the next week.

And BTW, this means start the whole plan tomorrow, not on Sunday at the beginning of the week. If you have already eaten a load of carbs today you will be hungry for the rest of the day. It's a blood sugar thing. So start tomorrow and keep remembering, you can do this.

Good luck to you!"

[ALISIA 1]

to help me stay focused i usually keep the photos i look the largest in all over the place or in a book, i even have some with only underwear on. then i make a goal book to remind myself of what i am working for i write everything down no matter how stupid it would seem. take all the junk out of your house, keep it anywhere out of your site. i dont watch normal tv because i dont even want to see commercials about junk. every time i crave something bad i grab the most annoying fat part of me and remind myself it will grow if i give in. i also pray, write paint draw read do anything but i only eat when it is time to not when i am "hungery". do everything and stick with it for at least 2 months after that it become easier.

[submariners wife 0]

wow...thank you sooo much for posting that, vegasangel. this is exactly what i needed.

[thinoneday 445]

My diet has been off track for many months now and my weight loss (or lack thereof) really reflects that.

In my head, I know what I need to do in order to lose the weight...but I cant get my body to do what I want.

I still am able to eat too much, not nearly what I ate pre-surgery, of course....but still alot, nonetheless. Its really depressing. Ive been thinking about asking my doctor for an appetite suppressant, except that they have never worked before. I crave food and get so hungry sometimes. I get full pretty fast, but Im taking in too many carbs and calories. My food addiction has never been lessened by WLS. I always thought this was the "miracle cure". Wow, was I wrong about that. That shows how naive I was, but I was just so convinced and so hopeful...not to mention it was my last chance at living.

Now, Im struggling and its my own fault, but still cant seem to work it out. I feel so guilty and ashamed over my inability to curb my appetite and effect change over my body. Theres been many times over the course of this journey that I have felt that I have wasted my chance and ruined my Sleeve.....I know thats not really the case. My Sleeve is functioning fine and still limits my intake by alot....but theres still the appetite and cravings for "bad foods".

I guess thats my vent for the day.. Any suggestions that I can actually follow? lol

Now I'm going to have a say too and it's not pretty. . .At least you've lost 112 lbs! That is an accomplishment. . .i'm sad for you that you don't have your own control over controlling yourself. . .that will always set us up for failure regardless of what it is. . be it with weightloss or life. . .negativity breeds negativity. . .I or anyone else here on the forum could give you tons of advice, would it help? Probably not because you've posted before with the same problem, we've tried to give advice but here you are again with the same problem, is it attention seeking? maybe. . i'm not trying to be mean or anything. . i realize your looking for some help, maybe you need to try couseling with a professional? There may be underlying problems that are preventing you from getting back onto the course. . . anyhow good luck with you and hope you do something about getting back on track, your only hurting yourself and nobody else. . .

Edited April 8, 2010 by thinoneday