Mom just died...and my surgery is May 9th...

Elisabethsew · April 26, 2006

I'm very sorry to hear about the loss of your Mom. People grieve in different ways and only you can determine how much time you need to move forward.

Did you discuss your planned surgery with your Mother before she died? Was she supportive of your decision to have lapband surgery? If the answers to these questions are yes, it would honor your mother to go ahead as planned.

As for surgery concerns, while there are always risks, you yourself stated how healthy you are with no co-morbities and 100 pounds to lose. Being an RN, I can tell you that you're actually considered a low risk for lap surgery. Take the time you need to make a decision.

dawner119 · April 26, 2006

Oh my goodness, such wonderful advice and empathy - thank you so much to everyone... your posts made me cry. I promise to give good thought to all of what you've said and will keep this band-family updated on what I wind up doing.

My "gut" (no pun intended) is leaning (again, no pun intended...) towards going ahead with the surgery on the 9th. Based on the comments in this forum, I have the utmost trust in my surgeon (Dr. Rumbaut in Monterrey, Mexico) and know I'm physically a great candidate for this. I worry if I don't do it now, I'll won't get up the nerve to do it again - I'm a big procrastinator. We'll see though - the pain of my mom's loss is still so fresh.

Thanks again to all of you. - Dawn

gentlespirit · April 26, 2006

I, too, am so sorry to hear about your mom. I haven't had to face that yet and can't imagine how hard it must be.

Only you know whether you can handle this extra stress right now. If you need to wait, just take all the time you need. Someone suggested that it might be a way to honor your mom to go ahead, and I liked that suggestion, but we can't decide what's right for you.

It's normal to fear the surgery...all of us were a little (or a lot!) nervous, but it is a fairly routine surgery and is probably safer than continuing without it. Know that you have lots of support and love here, whatever you decide.

Hugs~

Emily

Mita · April 26, 2006

I am so Sorry Dawn - My sincere condolances...

CCBSTX · April 26, 2006

Dawn...so sorry about your Mom. I can only imagine. I'd go ahead with the surgery. There will be doubts and jitters before hand. However, I believe your Mother, as in most Mothers, want their children to be happy and HEALTHY! Good luck with your decision. Shawn

Marimaru · April 26, 2006

Dawn, I'm very sorry to hear about your mom. Your doubts are understandable, but I think that in your position I would have the surgery as scheduled.

Dr. Rumbaut is a wonderful doctor, and if you tell him of your concerns, I'm sure he will do everything he can to help you understand the risks, and what he does to avoid problems.

*hugs*