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I Just Want To Give Up....please Help :(



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Hello,

I was banded on January 7th, 2011. My starting weight was 275, my lowest weight was 198 and my current weight is 225. I'm struggling so much. I feel like I'm never going to lose my weight. It's been two years and I blame myself. I feel like a failure. I see people every day losing and being so dedicated to this process. I dont know about any of you but I just cant seem to break the "fat girl habits". I love food. Its a problem. I eat bad things all the time. I try so hard to stay on diets but they only last for about a week or so. Has anyone else ever felt sick after a week or 2 of dieting? I feel shakey like I need the food. What foods do you all eat on lapband? I can't eat Soups forever....they arent satifying and I feel like if you have the lapband your expected to eat Soup and salads all the time. For me it's really not practical :( Has anyone else had this problem, where it took them over 2 years to finally do the right thing and get out of the 200's? I can't believe this january is 2 years and I'm still this big! Everyone I know is so dissapointed in me and ask me why I even got the surgery. It hurts so bad. I'm planning on getting a fill as soon as I can make an appointment. I'm 23 years old and a full time student, daycare teacher, and full time student teacher. My doctor is only open 2 days a week and those two days are when I'm in school until 9pm. I can't see my doctor for a fill until December break. I'm really trying to get back on track. I'm just scared I'll never be able to do it :(. Someone help. I could really use any advice.

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I'm truly sorry you're struggling so much.

The thing is, the band is a great tool. It's wonderful for helping to appease our hunger and lessen our appetite. But unfortunately it can't fix our brains. food addiction is very real and many of us need help to conquer it. It sounds to me like a counselor would benefit you greatly to help you learn coping mechanisms to deal with your food issues.

Along with a counselor, I'd also strongly suggest seeing a nutritionist. Dieting sucks and it's hard. It's also the reason so many of us fail. You don't need another diet, you need someone to show you how to eat and live healthy for a lifetime. A nutritionist, especially one dealing with bariatric patients, will help you to do that. They will help you establish food guidelines that work with your lifestyle and needs, not just another diet.

Best wishes

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Thank you for your kind words. It is a tool and not a solution, I've realized that the hard way. I plan on seeing a nutritionist as well, I can make that appointment back to back in december when I see my doctor.

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Sorry you are struggling. The way you are feeling when dieting sounds like you are "detoxing" off carbs ( I assume you avoid carbs while dieting). It does get better the longer you go without. I know what it is like to fail because I just had aBOB ( band over bypass.... Like carnie Wilson). This is my second chance. I have determined that I need to stay away from the crap foods and stop looking at food as my entertainment. It is not going to be easy, I know, but WLS is NOT enough to get rid of the weight. After my bypass i was doing amazing until ihad kids. I thought I could eat anything. At first I could but it doesn't last. I am seeing a therapist who specializes in WLS patients. Highly recommend this and read the book the end of overeating. The Dukan diet also has a long term plan on how to lose and maintain forever. Good luck!

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I agree with mis73. I meet with my NUT all the time. It is not about dieting. I very rarely eat Soup or salad! My NUT tells me it is about balance. Getting the Protein in first, then veggy and good carb. The key is being satisfied. Finding key ingredients that you enjoy eating. It took me several talks with her to get my mind thinking correct and my body listening to it! Not eating on a schedule, only eating when I am hungry, making good choices and being satisfied. We are here for you. Glad to help if you need.

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thank you....perhaps I need to try to cook ahead of time to have healthy meals on board

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I always have something on hand to tie me over if I get in a pinch. Dried fruit and nuts, or Peanut Butter ad cheese crackers, Lf Protein Bar. Granted, I just eat a couple bits, but it keeps me from going crazy, especially if I get stuck in a long meeting or something. I eat out a lot, but I do take my lunch to work most every day. That way I can eat when I need to eat. Just make sure you have things you like!

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Soups and salads are fine once in a while but Soup is a slider food. You need solid protien. Something that fills you up and stays with you.

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My doctor advises against soup/salad as well because of it not filling us up. You should eat your Protein first 3-4 ounces. Definitely plan your meals ahead of time and have healthy meals planned. When you wait until you are hungry it is too easy to make poor choices, overeat, etc.

I definitely agree with seeing a nutritionist as well. I have gotten a lot of great advice from mine. :)

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good grief ! sorry you are going through such a rough time, i know you're struggling. i dont have the problems you're having , but maybe i can add a little to the excellent previous posts ?? My dr said if i follow the rules 95 % of the time , i would be successful. ( make good food choices, take small bites and chew well,dont drink with meals but get plenty of Water and Protein 1st, fruits and veggies 2nd, carbs last) Well , he was right ! I was banded Dec, 2011 at 225 lbs, im now at 163 ! i rarely eat Soup or salad, just other healthy foods as i refuse to " diet!" i also make sure i have something sweet towards the end of the day when i get my craving for chocolate. sometimes its a skinny cow or weight watchers ice cream bar, or a mini snickers bar. this way i NEVER feel deprived, as i also eat something healthy every 2-3 hrs. i also exercise 3-5 days a week which has gone a loooong way towards the weight loss. hope this helps, you can do it ! good lucks

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Sometimes I think it just helps all of us to communicate with another person who really gets it. we forget what we need to do. a few friendly reminders will hopefully get you back on track, don't give up! this is not a race just keep moving in the right direction, even if it in slow motion.

thank you for seeking help, we all want you to succeed for life!

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Acknowledging that you've made poor food choices in the past is a good step, knowledge is key. But labeling yourself a failure is a bit harsh. If you fall into that trap, you'll believe it and then think to yourself that "since I'm already a failure, why bother trying?" You are not a failure, you're off course, in need of a nutritionist to explain proper eating, and you need a solid re-education of lap band living.

Posting here was a wonderful first step!

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Thank you all for such wonderful support. I need to find foods that I like that are healthy. I also need ot kick this sweet tooth craving. I think it happened because 6 months ago my band was tight and only bad foods like ice cream and shakes went down so I got used to that. I'm scared if I dont kick the sweets I'll become a diabetic. That scares me a lot.

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I just got banded 3 days ago and in fearful of being where you are. I too have a bit of a food obsession. I'm finding myself now, even not being hungry, still wanting that delicious food , especially sweets. I hope I can overcome it. I don't think it's realistic to have chicken and veggies forever but I think people like us need to find a balance that allows us to have something forbidden once and awhile, because what's the fun anymore? I'm a foodie due to my profession and can't imagine never eating some of the things I love ever again :(. I think counseling is a good idea, but it's only us who are accountable for our actions. We just need to find that balance. I think u can enjoy your favorite foods in moderation. Just allow yourself maybe once or twice a week to not feel deprived... Just keep portion in mind as delicious as it tastes. I hear you, you're not alone. :)

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