How Does Your Partner Handle The Surgery And Weightloss???

[Dacoop 84]

My husband at first was not for the surgery at all. He was raised why do surgery if nothings broke. I don't think he realized I was broke with gaining all the weight that I did. I lost my dad almost 4 years ago to brain cancer and eating was how I coped with it. But once I told this is what I needed to do for my health he was more supportive with it. After surgery he was really supportive with every step so far. The only times he gets a little frustrated is when I get something stuck and there is not much you can do but wait it out. I had one time I got some chicken majorly stuck and he was so ready to take me to the er but it finally went through after two hours. But I love my husband and I want to thank him for going through this with me. He tries to understand but really can't unless he has been through this.

[Holly Dolly 575]

He can't keep his hands off of me and at times it is quite annoying..........

[Grandma3 73]

My husband is a real trooper. He went to the seminars with me and has backed me all they way.

He has even tried to diet and has lost 6 pounds in 5 weeks with out a band.

I am very lucky to have this wonderful person in my life.

[MsDuran 62]

My husband is great.. He has always told me he loves me fat, skinny, bald or disfigured it doesn't matter and it was all up to me.!

[waitingpatiently 250]

He is amazing!! We have been together since we were 14 (thats 26 years ago)....so we BOTH have changed along lifes road....he lost his hair and I found 70 pounds!!

But he has always told me I am beautiful...I tell him he is blind!! He has supported me through this whole process....he doesn't undertand the whole thing but he justs wants me happy and healthy.

[kiwijo 2]

My husband has also been incredibly supportive. He even did the pre-op fluids diet with me (although he would have a normal lunch away from me while at work) and he's lost almost as much as me! Throughout the surgery and post op recovery, he took amazing care of me.

Only thing I will say is after a couple of beers the other night, lying in bed he said that he wonders if he will still be attracted to me if I end up thin but with lots of hanging skin. I'm 38 and have been big my whole life so I will end up with some baggy skin but I'm hoping with exercise and taking it slowly, I can tone up along the way and maybe only need brachioplasty and a boob job. But in reply I said that you never know what will happen but hopefully our love will get stronger with me being healthier and more energetic...

And I've told him the boob job will be for him because he loves my big boobs.

[AlleyKat 26]

My husband at first was not for the surgery at all. He was raised why do surgery if nothings broke. I don't think he realized I was broke with gaining all the weight that I did. I lost my dad almost 4 years ago to brain cancer and eating was how I coped with it. But once I told this is what I needed to do for my health he was more supportive with it. After surgery he was really supportive with every step so far. The only times he gets a little frustrated is when I get something stuck and there is not much you can do but wait it out. I had one time I got some chicken majorly stuck and he was so ready to take me to the er but it finally went through after two hours. But I love my husband and I want to thank him for going through this with me. He tries to understand but really can't unless he has been through this.

My husband is very much the same way (atleast so far, I'm preop). When i first brought up the idea of surgery with him he was very much against it. I love him for it but I got the, "you're beautiful the way you are" talk. I've been having a lot of health concerns lately and doctors (Both family and specialty) have said it is a good idea. After I booked it and talked to him about the potential health benefits for both me and our future children he got a little more onboard.

He stil hears the word 'surgery' and thinks it will be drastic and life threatening. he also doesn't understand the band. Everything I've had to eat since booking it he has said, "soon you wont be able to do that, you'll throw up". On Sunday I picked up my bike from my parents house and he said, "why are you getting that? You wont be able to ride it anymore. You'll throw up every bump you go over!". He is kidding but he really doesn't understand.

I've tried to get him to read over the paperwork and handouts the sugeon gave me but he has only glanced at them.

He gets more supportive every day and I'm hoping he will be on board after the surgery and he sees I lived through it lol. He is taking me to the surgery and I know he will help me after surgery. He just has touble grasping WHY. He has never experienced being big. He's started gaining wait a bit now but before he struggled with GAINING weight. He can lose whenever he wants to and doesn't really struggle.

i think he will also get frustrated if/when i get 'stuck' but I know he just worries about me and he is scared. My biggest concern is if i DO have any complications. i think I would get a great big "I told you so".

[Grandma3 73]

If you go to lapband.com and click on "How it Works" there is a little video that explains the band.

My son didn't really understand the band so I had him watch that.

Maybe you could get your husband to watch that.

[Jerseygirl82 18]

My husband has been truly great. Very supportive and tries to eat like me and not have my favorites in front of me. His only complaint is that I will lose my boobs! Men!

[honk 780]

Jerseygirl- I've lost about 167 pounds and my cup size hasn't changed at all!

[PandorasBox92264 61]

I was banded in Sept 08 back east when I was married to my EX Husband. Initially he was against the band because he felt it was going to be too expensive and he didn't understand why I needed to get surgery he felt I should just diet and exercise,exercise,exercise and I could become the 105 lb girl that he wanted with the legs up to her neck. Mind you the body size he had i mind for me and I am 5'4 was the type you see with the women who are 5'7 or taller, longer legs, no butt and pretty much straight up and down. I did advise him that for me it was an unrealistic shape because I would never be 105 lbs nor would I want to be. I was a size 16 when I met him anyway, so he knew when I met him that I was meaty. My goal was to become healthy because I had lost my Father in 05 to Cardiac Arrest, and My Mom had been diagnosed with Colon Cancer months before my surgery and passed away about 4 months after I had my band. Not all Partners will be supportive and try to think of things that they do or things that will help. Right after my surgery I had to deal with the eating of super sized GIANT hershey bars, not the one's you get that are big for one person but the ones you break apart for Smores! He would sit down and eat it right in front of me while watching TV and eat the entire thing. He would bring home the gallons of Ice Cream and sit right there eating away. It was not after I got settled into my routine but RIGHT after surgery when I was even in the liquid phase both pre and post op. Now I did not expect him to stop eating the junk food, but when someone is prepping for surgery or in the liquid phase one could limit the exposure in the house especially if you had to hear how much I needed to exercise and diet in order to give him the figure he thought was the right one for me. Anyway I dropped back down to a Woman's 16 and some 14's in Jeans. There were other issues that came into play into it that could fill a whole other blog on another type of site. I went through the banding, then lost my job, went to school fulltime, my Mother passed away and with all the changes I left and filed for divorce. That was April of 09 and even though it was a very tough year, I moved back home to California.

I have backslid because of losing insurance but still about 10 lbs less than my original weight and a size 20 in Women's Jeans. My new insurance paid for a fill, I am back seeing a new doctor out here and got my first fill since 09 last week. I am letting people know that good things do happen and come true, because I also had met a Guy January 1st 2010 who was from Texas. We did the friendship thing first, ended up doing the long distance thing then he moved to California and we have been living together for over a year and a half. We never fight, or argue which my sister finds to be amazing and are best of friends and lovers. He went with me to my fill appointment, which was a first for me and could hear what the doctor had to say about meals, fills, etc even the fearful number on the scale! He makes us Protein Drinks and wants to help me find the best foods for US to eat. He even did the liquid diet with me post fill and then pureed things after the fill to make it easier so he joined me in that. This was the type of relationship that I have always hoped for (not meaning food wise), but had evaded me, maybe I had looked too hard. Maybe I had to learn some things about life and experience two bad marriages. He fixed us each a nice Salmon dish tonight, and Loves to cook and is now looking for Band Friendly receipes. I guess the biggest thing is that he Loves me for me whether or not I am a size 20 or a size 2. You hear there are stories where Relationships break up over Lap Bands and Gastric Bypass, I guess I am part of that story however I wouldn't change it for ANYTHING. So to anyone who has a Relationship that is having a hard time stick with what you need to do for you! Don't do it for anyone else do it for yourself. If they want to keep you down, don't let them... Live your life! Look forward to the next adventure! You might just fine what you hoped for all your life!