So... I'm having trouble this week. My husband and I have been looking into the band for almost a month. We had a consultation. I had an EGD and found out I do have a hernia. We're making progress towards surgery... but I'm having trouble remembering that I'm doing this for me.

My #1 reason - I want to have a baby. Desperately. My husband and I agreed that I needed to lose weight to have a healthy pregnancy. We've tried everything and nothing would stick. Weight Watchers, HCG, diet and exercise, Slimfast... We'd do it for a while, not see much results, get discouraged and stop.

Well, since we started down the path to the band, I've been getting comments that I've never heard before - towards me or anyone. I'm sure b/c of my size things have been said behind my back. But WOW. I didn't know people could be so cruel. And of course, it had to happen AFTER I made the steps toward something that could actually help me be healthier.

I've never had a self-esteem problem. I like me, always have. I'm not getting the band b/c I think I'm ugly or unattractive. I want to be healthy. I want to start a family with the man I love. But these remarks are so hurtful and discouraging. It's hard to remember that this is for me. That I don't need other people's approval. That I'm not trying to prove them wrong.

What's your motivation? What keeps you going? How did you fight ugly-on-the-inside people before the band? And after?

=_) Thanks guys!!

1. I'm 36 years old. 5'10"' date=' 265 lbs. Have severe sleep apnea.

2. I was only 5-10 pounds overweight through age 18 and then 10-15 pounds overweight throughout college. I really packed on the pounds after college and was a bachelor

3. I am not married and have a 2 year old son that I need to be around forever. If I don't lose the 100-110 lbs I'm gonna live a low quality life. Since he is two. I have a good 2-4 years to lose the 110 lbs and then he'll be at an age where I can ride roller coasters with him, sit comfortably in an airplane with him, and share other experiences with him that would be near impossible (or at least difficult) being 100-110 lbs over weight.[/quote']

I mean i am NOW married.

I understand what you're going through. I have moyamoya disease, a progressive neurological disorder (also incurable). When I was diagnosed, a neurosurgeon wouldn't operate on me because I am morbidly obese (BMI 47). That experience has motivated me to try to lose this weight and live life without limitations.

Before I got sick I didn't want to get married or have children. Now, I want to have children someday and live long enough to see my children have children.

How far are you into the process? I just had my first consult yesterday. If all goes well, my surgery will probably happen before the end of the summer?

I was banded on Jan. 6 and have lost 87 pounds since then. So, I'm doing really well! It's actually helped improved my quality of life a lot. It has even helped some of my MS symptoms. My ability to walk longer distances has improved drastically because losing weight takes so much extra stress off my legs. I still have a lot of weight to lose but even now, I feel better than I have in years.

I hope your quality of life improves drastically too. Best wishes to you

I am with the majority here, I want to live a very long healthy life. Many people don't know I am going to have this done except a few 'selected' friends and family members. I have over heard several people in passing about overweight people saying how we are taking the 'easy' route in having weight loss surgery, some comments such as "why don't they just get off their fat lazy asses and exercise and put the cake down". I know these people are simple minded individuals that really have no clue what struggles we endure on a daily basis.

I have one hip replaced (total) and my other one is going. Simple things like walking without excruciating pain would make my life so much easier. The weight currently on my new hip scares me the most because I am still young, well for a hip replacement patient I am, and this new hip needs to last me a lifetime. I want a 'do over' I feel as if I cheated myself out of so much I could have done with my life. This I pray will give me that second chance I always wanted.

I am a contractor overseas and the new company that has taken us over. Stated at my physical that next year when I redo a physical something has to give. Yes I understand I am over weight, but my insurance company stated my BMI wasn't high enough for them to pay for it. I paid out of pocket, but I have been saving for this for a while now. I found a respectful doctor who I adore.

Now to answer your question I did this to be able to maintain employment and live a healthier life.

I was banded on Jan. 6 and have lost 87 pounds since then. So' date=' I'm doing really well! It's actually helped improved my quality of life a lot. It has even helped some of my MS symptoms. My ability to walk longer distances has improved drastically because losing weight takes so much extra stress off my legs. I still have a lot of weight to lose but even now, I feel better than I have in years.

I hope your quality of life improves drastically too. Best wishes to you [/quote']

87 lbs since January!!!! That is so inspiring! I don't know you, but I am so proud of you! Keep up the great work!

I'm glad the weight loss has helped your MS. I am hoping that my symptoms will impove some. I actually love to exercise (I used to play basketball in HS), but the headaches have stunted my ability to do it regularly, in addition to the fatigue, weakness, joint pain and bad leg cramps.

Best wishes to you too

What fears did you have before surgery.

Honestly the biggest fear I had was that something would go wrong during surgery and I wouldnt be here for my children .....since being banded I do so much more withthem...they all see how much happier I am...which makes them happy !

Tex, here is my story. I am now 59 years old. I was banded 12/20/08 and have lost 90 pounds. I was on the yo yo diet for my whole life, up and down constantly. I finally got rewarded for that kind of dieting with high blood pressure, severe knee problems, high cholesterol and borderline diabetes. I no longer am on any medication and feel like a teenager and am down to my size 10 clothes again. I did this for health reasons only but people do treat you so differently when thin than when you are heavy. I, like you, WAS very sensitive to remarks about my weight whether in front of me or behind my back. I would cry at the drop of a hat because it cut my very soul with those hurtful remarks. Now I am at the point in my life that they can all screw themselves because my motto is the first 50 years I was trying to please them and these last 50 years I am here to please ME ONLY! People are very hateful and hurtful and you need to keep telling yourself that this is all about you and your life!! You can do it and someday you will feel the same way like me, after a lifetime of slams about weight, you will finally become numb to the inconsiderate and hurtful remarks. You go girl and I have faith you can do this too.

Thanks Dee!!!

I started the small meal 3x a day today to try it out. Bkfst was awesome... but waiting 6 hours for lunch I already killing me! I'm tired of yo-yoing and am ready to take me life back!

Doing better with remembering why I'm doing this. My husband helps a lot too =)

Thanks Dee!!!

I started the small meal 3x a day today to try it out. Bkfst was awesome... but waiting 6 hours for lunch I already killing me! I'm tired of yo-yoing and am ready to take me life back!

Doing better with remembering why I'm doing this. My husband helps a lot too =)

I have many many reasons for .starting this journey. My primary reason is my healh, I feel as if I am already on a path of death unless I lose some of this weight. I have gained 140 lbs in 8 years, and I am very ashamed of myself. I feel as if this is beyond my control now. I try and lose weight and nothing happens. I feel like people are always looking at me, ecspecially when I am out to dinner with my family. I have an 8 year old daughter that I want to play with but I don not have the energy or stamina to keep up with her. I want my husband to still be attracted to me and not feel pity on my. I want to love myself again and not cry when I look at myself.

I could go on and on about my reasons, but my most important one is me, I need this for me to live.

When I hit 326 lbs at 22 years old I realized how much I had missed out because of my size. There is also a history of diabetes in my family and I wanted to avoid that.

Jealousy is an EVIL.

People in general have been very opinionated when I talk about getting healthy and banding. I thin they're jealous a bit that now I'll look better than them or something. It's a shame, I love me and only want to be healthy - at 38. I want to live long enough to see my 3 year old babies be born and lots more!! Good luck. My surgery is aug 15. So excited but a very emotional time as well.

Jealousy is an EVIL.

People in general have been very opinionated when I talk about getting healthy and banding. I thin they're jealous a bit that now I'll look better than them or something. It's a shame' date=' I love me and only want to be healthy - at 38. I want to live long enough to see my 3 year old babies be born and lots more!! Good luck. My surgery is aug 15. So excited but a very emotional time as well.[/quote']

So true. I work at Lane Bryant and needed time off for surgery which I had 5/8. I told my manager I was getting banded and she actually laughed in my face, saying it was too drastic, that I didn't need it, that it was the easy way out etc. probably jealousy.

I did it because I want to live long enough to drain my pension plan that I would have paid into for 25 years. My plan: take my now skinny rear end to the tattoo parlor and get my employers logo tattooed on my rear end with the money from my first retirement check. 16 years and 2 weeks to go! And I'm going to live to be 90 and see my great grandchildren be born! While continuing to cash my pension checks! LOL. Just kidding, sort of...

BUT actually: having the diabetes, fatty liver, obesity, high cholesterol, and start of high blood pressure all completely gone from my life is so wonderful! I was really worried I wouldn't see 50 if I continued on the same track.