I have a number of "most embarrassing moments" They all were turning points at the time, of some sort. A few of the "highlights":

When I was a mere 180 lbs. and went to get on one of those swing rides that go around in the air at a local festival with my best friend. I got in the swing and had myself all locked in and the little carny kid who ran the ride had to come over and tell me I couldn't ride cuz I was too heavy! UGGGHHH To my best friends credit, she got outta her swing too and walked away quickly with me.

:scared: When I got divorced and was going through some terrible self loathing I actually hooked up with a horrible abusive musician guy that I had dated for two years when I was in my senior year in High school and starting college. We were laying on his couch in his looser apartment one morning and he actually was singing "Why am I sleeping with a cow"...I just got up with as much dignity as I could muster and put on my jacket and walked out the door.

:faint: My one and only attempt at internet dating was when I arranged to meet a guy that I had been talking too for quite awhile online and we really seemed to hit it off. We decided to meet at a local watering hole and I told him what I would be wearing so he would know me when he saw me. (this was about 8 years ago, before the advent of the digital camera and stuff so most people still did not have their pics all over the place like they do now). He knew from chatting with me that I was "chubby". I was about 210 and a size 18 at the time. Well I went into the bar and ordered a drink and tried to ize up the people in there to see if he was there yet, I heard a few guys laughing at the end of the bar and they all seemed to be sneaking glances at me. They all got up at the same time and left. I stayed for another half hour and never saw a guy come in who fit the description. I left and went home in shame....little did I know of theshame that awaited me online! The guy emailed me and told me that he and his budddies went in to check me out together and that I was crazy to think that anyone would want a fat ass like me.....OUCH.

Anyway, any one of these should have been a huge turning point for my weight loss efforts, but, if anything they made me worse. I think back on them now and I still feel the sting, but I am also much stronger now and I know the band will help me too.

1. At the mall one afternoon, I decided to stop and get some chinese food for lunch. The tiny Asain lady behind the counter asked me so sweetly and pointing to my tummy, "Oh, eating for two?"

This is before I had my first child. I felt so sad...

2. While swimming at the YMCA last summer, my little boy spotted an overweight woman entering the pool. "Mommy, Mommy, look. She's fat like you," he said, as if it were nothing more than sharing the same hair color, wearing the same outfit, etc. He does not associate anything negative with being overweight right now; he's five. He's so funny. He says that I am a "circle" and my husband (who's is about 10 lbs. overeight) is "straight" (like a line).

This hurt me more than the Asian lady's comment. I don't want my children to grow up with a fat mom; hence, I am pursuing the lap band.

I feel your pain! Thank you for sharing. I think you're really brave. Those guys were such assholes!!!!

I've had my own share of painful episodes related to being obese, too. I've never told anyone this, but when I was to be the matron of honor for my sister's wedding in 1998, I couldn't bring myself (in front of my skinny sisters & critical mother) to order a dress larger than a 15/16. I told myself that I would lose weight before the wedding so that I would be able to fit into the dress. (I would have needed to lose at least 25-30 lbs.) Then I went into denial and put it out of my mind.

When the dress came in, of course there wasn't enough time before the wedding to lose the weight I needed to lose, even if I would have starved myself.

I took the dress to an alterations place where the gal told me that there wasn't really anything to do--except I could try to find additional green velvet that would match so they could piece it into the dress. I started crying. I was thinking how was I going to deal with this? I thought maybe I would tell everyone that the dress was stolen out of my car, right before the wedding and then I wouldn't be able to be her maid of honor. The seamstress gal I guess took pity on me and then she said she would see if the seams could be let out and the stitch marks could be pressed out. Thankfully, that was possible. For an exhorbitant fee, they were able to alter it so that it (barely) fit me. I felt so shamed and awful. Of course, over the next few years I gained at least 40 more lbs, before finally being banded in 7-05. Maybe someday I could tell me sister--I don't know.

I won't be in that position again, thanks to the band. Also, I like to think I am braver now and would just order the right size to begin with, no matter what the number on the size tag said.

1. 5th grade playing that game "Twister" during inside recess. I ripped the crotch out of my jeans. I told the teacher and she sent me to the bathroom. She sent one of my classmates to fetch my jeans from me so she could sew them, in front of all my classmates. I cried and begged and pleaded for my classmate to beg to teacher to call my mom to bring me another pair of pants. My classmate pleaded for me and the old witch refused. I was so embarrassed when I returned to class after my sew job.

2. I worked at a summer camp for developmentally disabled children. I was there 2 weeks when I had enough. The rest of the camp counselors were in the teens and twentys, I was 31. We had to hike down to the swimming beach which was atleast a mile away, then we played tag and running games all the time. When I ran my fat roll slapped on my thighs and everyone could hear it. One of the little boys asked why my body was SOOO fat. I wanted to cry. I told him God makes everyone special, he smiled and gave me a hug. That made everything better.

I am sure there are a million little moments in my life that hurt at the time, but I can't recall anymore at this time. I know these moments, the good, the bad and the ugly made me the person I am today. A person who has compassion and understanding and a heart of gold. Thanks for the great thread.

Well, I have many of these stores where do i even start.

-I had a crush on a guy in 5th grade and he and his friends laughed at me and called me a fat bitch. (pretty deep stuff for a 5th grader) he got his due in high school though, he got some girl pregnant and got hauled off to jail for having sex with a minor!

-I feel so ashamed when people pat my belly and tell me I need to work on that. Every one from my grandmother, to my mother in law to complete strangers on the street have done that.

-When I went to McDonalds the other day, the guy at the drive in knew who i was. :faint:

-I've been asked if I was pregnant numerous times, to many times to count. I was once away from work for a few days for a fair, and when i came back a regular customer looked at me and said, your back so soon?? what about the baby...she thought I had gone to the hospital to give birth.

-Every time i get on a plane im afraid the seatbelt wont fit me and ill have to ask for an extension.

-probably the worst is from when i was a child, 6,7,8 and my dad use to sing to me "fatty fatty 2x4 can't get through the kitchen door." I knew there was a reason I loathe that guy.

There was a really good one I had thought of as well and now i cant remember i'll come back and edit the post if i remember.

*I remembered...... I went for a boat ride with my husband and my cousins husband who is a very fit Army captain. My cousin didn't come because she had to work. We got pretty far out and found a really nice place that had clear blue waters, but no land near by. It was really hot so we decided to swim. We all jumped off the boat into the Water and had a nice swim. It was only after I was ready to get back in the boat did we realize that the boat had no ladder to get in. My hubby and my cousins husband pulled theirselves in no problem. I tried getting in, but my foot slipped on the propeller and I sliced it open. I tried 3 more times with their help to get in but couldn't do it. I felt my strength drained, and it started raining. I was afraid sharks would smell the blood from my foot and start coming near the boat. I was near tears when finally the army captain had a brilliant idea. He formed a rope ladder from some rope on the boat and haulled me in. Amen for army training!

This post is making me really, really sad............:cry

This one happened to my sister-in-law, who is a very big girl. She was cleaning the house one of those extra long t-shirts (like a dress.) Before she knew it, my 4-year old nephew took a running start at her, pulled up the skirt and played hide and seek under her dress for LIKE A HALF A SECOND before coming back up totally green and saying "PHEEEWWWW."

That's got to be one of the funniest things I've ever seen in my life, but if I were her, I would have died on the spot. She was mortified and embarrassed, but kids are so innocent, and how could we NOT laugh at that when the lil guy was plugging his nose?

Okay, here's one...

My husband & I went on a trip to Cancun 2 yrs ago. We signed up to go snorkeling. Being in a swimming suit was emberassment enough. I had prepared for this trip 3-months in advance because I didn't want to be emerassed in my suit. I got a tan, found a suit that fit comfortably & I thought I would just get over it!! As we got on the boat, they were handing out life jackets. I was one of the last on the boat & everyone was pretty much seated. They handed me a life jacket that was a size SMALL & it just would NOT fit. I handed it back & told him I needed a larger one. He YELLED to the guy on top of the boat to get a bigger one. "GRANDE!! GRANDE!!!" (I can still hear it ringing in my ears!) All eyes were on me as I stood there in my swimming suit, the fattest one on the boat!!!!! When they got me the bigger life jacket, it still didn't fit. Once again, the man YELLED to get a larger one. This happened 4 different times!!!! I was so humiliated & could hardly keep from crying. They got me the largest life jacket they had & it was still tight. They man said - 'Sorry, you wear it or don't swim!"

As we were in the Water, I couldn't keep up with the group because they were all swimming so fast. In spanish, I heard the man saying to everyone - "Hold on. We have to wait for the fat lady." I'm sure he didn't know I could understand him.

Needless to say, I have never gone snorkeling since & have had nightmares about that day.

AAAmom, don't be sad - it's not healthy. If we can't laugh, we'll cry. Why the heck do you think I'm so funny? I think God gave me extra padding to protect me.

I was dating a guy for a couple months when he suddenly mentioned my weight. Before that day, he completely accepted me for who I was. We had a sexual relationship, but nothing oral was going on yet since I consider that a deeper, more intimate expression of love that we hadn't gotten to "yet." I guess he got tired of waiting and one night just blurted out, "Do you know why guys date fat chicks?" I wasn't about to let him know how horrified I instantly became, so I played cool and said, "Why?" He explained that fat chicks gave the best blowjobs in the world since they're so desperate. I acted really cool and laughed it off and made an excuse to end the evening. My phone rang off the hook for a month, but I never spoke with him again. Problem is, some men are so stupid at matters of the heart that he probably didn't realize how bad that burned.

I just want to say that I think this is a great thread. It pulls us together in experience and lets us reflect on our blessings and fortune now being banded and less afraid. We are who we are because of the experiences and life we have lived and I for one am thankful for that. The things that happened to us today or yesterday, shape who we are for tomorrow. I hope that many of us can become stronger from sharing our stories and experiences and rise above it and use it to propel us further into our healthy future.

I know I am not always the most serious one on this board, but I really mean this. Thank you Chameleon for starting this thread again.

((starts to walk away singing Pat Benatar's Invicible))

This is a really sad subject but so true we can all remember those terrible moments but the make us have empathy and compassion and hopefully we pass that on to other people. I always teach my kids to be kindhearted to everyone. what ever goes around comes around. they would know if they were in our shoes

Ok - this one happened to my aunt....

My aunt used to be a pretty thin lady, but over time got to be a pretty big lady. She once went to a wedding and she and my mom went to the restroom. My mom went into a stall and heard this old lady talking to my aunt. Went something like this....

Old Lady: *looking at my aunt* "Who errrr yoooouuuu?????"

Aunt: Well I'm Tom's Ex Wife.

Old Lady: "Noooooooo way! What the heck happened to you???"

Aunt: "Well, what do you mean?"

Old Lady: "Well, you blew up!"

My Mom on the Toilet: *teeth falling on the floor*

Aunt: "oh - yes I guess I've gained a little weight. Happens to the best of us."

Old Lady: "A little? Happened to my sister - she looks like a damn elephant!"

My Mom on the Toilet: *now snorting and peeing up a storm she's laughing so hard*

My mom and aunt still laugh about this to this day. Don't you wonder sometimes what the heck people are thinking when they say stuff like this?

This one's mine......

This has been SEVERAL years back.....

Went out with my sister in law and brother in law to 6th street in Austin. Stopped by the shot bar. Had every shot in the bar. Somehow they got me home and on the sofa to go to sleep.

Now, this is all second hand - but here is what I understand happened....

Stood up - walked over to the speaker (one of the big tall old kind that sat on the floor) - dropped trousers - squatted and peed on the floor. As if this wasn't bad enough, I then looked at everyone and fell flat on my face passed out with my big bare butt sticking up in the air. I woke the next morning wondering where my pants were. Evidently it took a team of people to get me in the shower and back into my sofa bed. All I can say is oh my gosh - I have never been so embarrassed and humiliated! Haven't had a shot since!

shots - $65

taxi ride home - $20

your family seeing your naked fat butt after you peed on their floor - priceless

* My daughter told everyone at her preschool that I used to be squishy but I had weight loss surgery and now I am getting skinny.

* My ex-husband told me that he didn't marry me so that I could get fat. (I was getting fat cuz I was eating to comfort myself from his abuse.)

* When my daughter was 5 months old the lady in the fabric department at walmart asked me if I was due anyday...duh, I have a tiny baby in a carrier it would be impossible to be due anyday again already

* Right after I was banded I ordered a kids meal at outback and the waiter asked me if that would be enough food for me.

* the summer before my banding I was too big to ride several of the rides at six flags

Now for the happier times

* I am looking forward to riding EVERYTHING at Disney in 3 weeks

* I can carry my 45 pound kid and climb the stairs without feeling like I am dying

* I have lost more than my little princess weighs

* My size 14 pants are getting baggy

* the kid that does stock at trader joes hit on me last week

* I can tie my shoes without holding my breath

I look back on the hard times of being my heaviest and am thankful that I was strong enough to endure. I look forward to happier days and smile, knowing that I have endured enough to deserve and really enjoy those days yet to come. ~Mandy

"Do you know why guys date fat chicks?" I wasn't about to let him know how horrified I instantly became, so I played cool and said, "Why?" He explained that fat chicks gave the best blowjobs in the world since they're so desperate.

I was just thinking the other day about some of things people have said to me that will always stick with me...

one day, maybe 5 years ago, a girl I was going to school with was telling me how this really good looking guy friend of hers told her how he liked hooking up with 'fat chicks', for that very reason. I'd never thought of it before, and have ever since, worrying that that's the reason any guy ever hits on me.

Another time, in highschool, I was walking towards a couple guys, and as I passed him the one guys said "slap the fat, and ride the wave" and made a 'wave' motion with his hand.

:cry Mandi

"Do you know why guys date fat chicks?" I wasn't about to let him know how horrified I instantly became, so I played cool and said, "Why?" He explained that fat chicks gave the best blowjobs in the world since they're so desperate. .

Fat, skinny, bulemic, healthy. I do it good anyway, always have!! It is an "art". So he can just kiss my thinning ass!!

This happened to someone else, but I saw it from a distance.

We were at Home Depot. It was the first warm day of spring -- you know how packed they get with people coming in with a fresh case of spring fever. There were some Rubbermaid chairs set out on display inside, right by the garden center. A large lady went to sit on one of the chairs and as soon as she settled her weight on it, it broke apart and she fell to the floor on top of a pile of broken plastic. And then she couldn't get up on her own, she had to try and crawl over to a shopping cart and use it to get herself up, but it rolled away from her and she fell down again. Then she just sort of layed there looking around at people, obviously humiliated and probably having no idea how she was going to get up. A guy went over to help her up but couldn't do it on his own so he yelled to his buddies, "Guys give me a hand, she's too heavy for me to get up on my own." It took him and three of his friends to get her up.

I've had very few "public" embarassments. I've been told that I'm "intimidating", so I would imagine I've gotten it much worse behind my back than to my face... plus in the days when kids are their meanest I hung out with a group of awesome epople who looked really rough, and were very protective of me, so I never had to take a lot of flack... but I had a day from hell once... one of those days where you want to give up and move away and leave life behind. I was about 18 and had just started gaining weight... was probably a sz 20... this was one of those "all time low days" because so many things went wrong in such a short time... I went to a 5-7-9 shop to buy a friend a present. I was flipping through things on the rack and a girl walked up to me and was like, "You're looking for someone else, right?" It took me a few seconeds to process what she had said, and in the meantime I must have just been looking at her blankly, because as soon as it hit me, she piped up with, "We only carry up to size 9 here. But there's a Lane Bryant across the way. They carry your size." I had planned on going to LB anyway, so I was heading over there and passed a group of younger boys (maybe 13/14ish) and as I walked by they all started yelling out, "Boom baba boom baba boom..." and one of them coughed phlegm into his mouth and tried to spit on me. Later at the mall I ran into some friends and we stopped at a pizza place in the mall to eat. The chairs were very small, and when I went to get up my hips were stuck and the chair came up with me. Later that night I had a soft ball game... the other team's bleachers were right behind me, and their pitcher's boyfriend was in the first row. The first pitch I hit over the fence, but it went foul. I went back up to the plate, and heard the girl's boyfriend yell, "Throw her something she'll hit on the ground. She's so fat she can't run. She has to hit home runs to get around the bases. Make her run and you'll get her out." Well - I hit it on the ground, and tried to run, but it had poured down rain during the game and the dirt between home and first was super slick mud. I got about 10 feet down the line, slipped in the mud, and fell on my face. All I remember is hearing the girl's boyfriend yelling, "Beached whale! Beached whale!"