Support From You Signifigant Other?

[dhales 98]

Omg.... my husband has been telling me the same thing from the get go.... then when i get skinny i was going to find another man..... i told him if i wanted another man i could have had many already even at 223lbs. That normally shuts him up for a while. A while back he said... how much more weight are you going to lose.... I said, i don't know why. He said, cuz your starting to look like a bag of bones... INSERT KNIFE IN HEART...

Now that i had the tummy tuck... He's been hitting the gym even harder.

So this is my theory.... Now that we have lost or losing the fat.... they are pissed that they are not getting the attention anymore.... and for years they have counted on we as "fat" girls have self esteem problems and they know that we would not feel comfortable with other men.... but now that they see other men looking at us and complimenting us..... THEY ARE SCARED.... Scared that we will leave. The other night one of our "biker" guy friend told him...(i over heard) Damn Jim... Chris sure is look fine.... He turned white and his expression was one of fear... Of course he said, yes she is.... but that was all he said.

Dang Bayougirl! You have lost quite a bit of weight already. I think you are right in that they feel secure and us changing (even for the better) makes them uneasy. I know my husband is trying to joke about it...but I can tell he is hurting a little. I will support him in this struggle just as I hope he will support me in mine.

I kind of see it like this...he loved me at my absolute worst. What better testament of love? If I were to leave him because now there are more "options"...."options" of men who wouldn't have looked twice at me before...how crappy would that be. I mentioned that to him and he seemed to feel better. I think life changes in the ones we love - forces us to look at things we need work on personally and sometimes it isn't a pretty picture. I love my life with him...why would that change? Silly man!

[MummyMeagan 7]

You girls are both very beautiful I could see why they would start to worry. Maybe thats whats the matter with my husband he knows Im a pretty girl and once the lbs melt off everyone will see it even the jerks who didnt before. I would never leave my husband only if he kept me back from things that I wanted to do that I know are good for me. I am pretty sure he supports me in the journey he just got a bug up his ars when he said what he did. Im going for it full steam ahead. Im excited and you all are so awesome for replying to this post. It helps to know there are other people out there going through this process and at all diffrent stages. Keep up the awesome work it takes alot of courage!

[SageTracey 608]

My husband has been my champion throughout this journey, eating with me, exercising with me, and always encouraging me, both in his words and actions. We have become even closer and are really enjoying spending more time together than ever before. Maybe I could have done this without him, not sure, but I truly believe that I have been so successful so quickly because he is 100% on my team. I was banded on 13 April 2011 and have lost 58kg.

[MummyMeagan 7]

Thats so amazing ! I think it would be easy to get my husband on board along with me because he used to diet every strictly. He has gained some weight since the kids along with me and I know he is concious about his belly. I am excited for everything to start rolling along. I have my first 6 month pre op visit next Thursday.

[BayougirlMrsS 3,933]

my husband didn't want me to have the surgery. during one of our Many arguments he said..... you losing weight was the worst thing that ever happen to us.... this is because my "attitude" has changed... or so he says. I tell him ... well hell yes my attitude has changed.... i lost 80some pounds.....

Now he is dealing with the Tummy Tuck after math....lol Which by the way.. i'm sooooo happy i did. That i had to pay myself. He is not helping me with it. Well i say that but he did give me $500.

He is just so scared i will leave. i told him if he keeps his crap up.... i will, but it won't be because of the weight loss it will be because of him.

[Allison0927 329]

my husband didn't want me to have the surgery. during one of our Many arguments he said..... you losing weight was the worst thing that ever happen to us.... this is because my "attitude" has changed... or so he says. I tell him ... well hell yes my attitude has changed.... i lost 80some pounds.....

Now he is dealing with the Tummy Tuck after math....lol Which by the way.. i'm sooooo happy i did. That i had to pay myself. He is not helping me with it. Well i say that but he did give me $500.

He is just so scared i will leave. i told him if he keeps his crap up.... i will, but it won't be because of the weight loss it will be because of him.

ARE WE MARRIED TO THE SAME MAN???? LOL - great post and a ton of it sounds very familiar - like someone had my house bugged!!!!!!!

[MummyMeagan 7]

I was wondering what that would cost me because I am pretty sure my insurance isnt going to cover that. I can imagine that some men are with us like stated before because they know we are chubby and the chances of us leaving before were unlikely. I dont have self esteem issues like that tho I have an awesome personality and alot of men Iv dated before didnt even see my chubbieness. Well maybe he will adjust to it and quit giving you trouble about it. I know it will take time for my self to adjust to the new me let alone everyone around me. Im sure I will have people who are jealous of my sucess but Im not doing it for them Im doing it for myself and my children.

[BayougirlMrsS 3,933]

ARE WE MARRIED TO THE SAME MAN???? LOL - great post and a ton of it sounds very familiar - like someone had my house bugged!!!!!!!

LOL.... i hope yours is not as self-centered as mine. I did what i wanted to do and have never re-grated one moment. Lapband was my saving grace.

So now i have a 8000k Tummy Tuck to pay for.... but i don't care.....

[Allison0927 329]

LOL.... i hope yours is not as self-centered as mine. I did what i wanted to do and have never re-grated one moment. Lapband was my saving grace.

So now i have a 8000k Tummy Tuck to pay for.... but i don't care.....

me too - i need to start saving because i definitely want one of those!!!

[BayougirlMrsS 3,933]

i was going to take out a personal loan.... but the interest was too high even with my excellent credit. So I went to my bank (Chase) and open a Slate card with 15 months 0% interest. Monthly note... $80bucks. But i'm going to pay $200 so i can get it down. If i have a balance at 13 month, i'm going to switch to another 0% card.... So if all goes as i plan... i would have paid no interest or finance fees...

I think that is a great idea.... start yourself a TT fund. Kind of like a Christmas Club....LOL... wish i would have done that.

You are doing so great with your weight loss.... and your so pretty, i can see why your husband wanted you to stay.... Fluffy. I'm sure your are having men hit on you already....

[Allison0927 329]

i was going to take out a personal loan.... but the interest was too high even with my excellent credit. So I went to my bank (Chase) and open a Slate card with 15 months 0% interest. Monthly note... $80bucks. But i'm going to pay $200 so i can get it down. If i have a balance at 13 month, i'm going to switch to another 0% card.... So if all goes as i plan... i would have paid no interest or finance fees...

I think that is a great idea.... start yourself a TT fund. Kind of like a Christmas Club....LOL... wish i would have done that.

You are doing so great with your weight loss.... and your so pretty, i can see why your husband wanted you to stay.... Fluffy. I'm sure your are having men hit on you already....

Awww you're so sweet (and beautiful yourself)! Good for you on figuring out the financing on the TT - I'll have to look at some of those avenues myself! Yes, I'm sure it's hard on our husbands to suddenly see the guys coming out of the woodwork with compliments and more. I'm sure there's some insecurities there as there would be with me if the shoe was on the other foot. Still, i'm never going to let something like that deter me from my goal of being fit, attractive and mentally happier. If the men don't like it they can step up their games!!! LOL

[kymie9899 37]

Support comes and goes. One minute I get encouraged the next (5 seconds ago) he tries shoving cheesecake in my mouth, literally. I said no and turned it away, yay me!

[MummyMeagan 7]

Man and cheese cake to thats rough ! Hopefully over time he gets used to your new life style ! As will mine once im there ! Keep up the good work !