I Want To Let Everyone Know It's Okay To Not Be Perfect

[TheRealSouthernBelle 22]

If you are anything like me you've lost weight successfully many times in your life. You've NEVER kept it off and you probably did it by some ridiculous means or something you just could not keep up for the long term. It's okay to NOT be perfect! We all cannot cook everyday from scratch, we all can't measure every food we eat all the time, we all can't log in and count our calories everyday, and most importantly we all can't resist our favorite foods (all the time), whether it be something sweet, salty, processed, prepackaged, filled with fats and butter or whatever tickles your fancy. For some reason, people that I know see me as the health guru. Like I have all the questions about weight loss and eating healthy. Think again. LOL! I have practically broken every bandster "rule" there is. The reason I have rule in quotation marks is because they vary so much. Being on these message boards, I have heard so many ridiculous, strange, true, absurd, scary, intriguing, interesting, etc. information about eating, food, dieting, etc. I've always searched for the magic cure for my obesity (since about 5). I cried because I was always large. Then I started to think it was okay to be big and nothing would happen. Then I got depressed, high blood pressure, and out of shape (even being over 200 lbs. I could keep up with the skinnys in the gym). I hit bottom, got LB started eating healthier, exercising etc. and have lost over 100 lbs. Have I eaten burgers? YES! Have I eaten ice cream? Oh, hell yes! What about pizza, wings, Cookies, cake, etc.? You name it I've probably eaten it in the last year after my WLS. You might say well that's not on the "plan"! Well, what is on the plan? No sweets, no carbs, Proteins, and veggies only? LOL! If I could eat that way I don't think I would have needed Lapband. Prior to the surgery that's how I ate because that's how you lose weight. Right? Of course, but that's also how you gain it back. You are always hungry. You can't even have cake on your birthday. You feel guilty for picking up fast food after having a long day at the office, busting your ass at the gym, and picking the kids up from some practice. You have to be realistic about your goals, your diet (what you consume on a daily basis), and living with the band. You CANNOT be perfect and someone who is expecting to be perfect is setting themselves up for major disappointment. I just wanted to share what I read on another website. It's my mantra for weight loss! You don't have to be a perfect bandster all the time (just most of the time) LOL!

for a while, I was seeing an abundance of "what's gonna happen to my boobs" threads. new batches daily, it seemed. but, lately, I'm seeing new folks coming in and asking if they can eat so-called 'normal' food. and, of course, soon thereafter they are informed by various members that, no, all of that food is terrible and they must stock their fridge with organic lettuce grown under the sunshine reflected off a tropical rainbow.

that really bothers me. people join this site, often, after years of failed attempts. many are frustrated ... discouraged. so much so that it probably wouldn't take much for them to just throw it in and give up. and you know what just might be that push? the organic rainbow lettuce brigade.

you know what, that food is certainly nutritious. no one is really going to argue that point. and is nutritious food better for your body than not-so-nutritious food? well, yeah. but here's the thing, ORLBs (Organic Rainbow Lettuce Brigade). that's an extreme change many -- if not most -- people can't make. and, yes, I said can't -- not won't. it isn't always as simple as just throwing away all the food you've got and restocking with fresh produce and tofu burgers. the first obstacle is cost. the second is ease/feasibility. and that's not even figuring in the fact that many -- if not most, again -- don't like to eat that food!

I get the concept that food is fuel. sometimes you have to eat things you may not like. but I'm not going to make it long by making that kind of food my only kind of food. that's no way to live, dreading your next meal. and most people won't. that's why diets fail. and that's why MFP (My Fitness Pal) works. because a calorie is a calorie.

Yes. You CAN eat 'normal' food. I'll eat pizza. I'll eat chocolate. I eat Pasta and bread and even, now and then, a cookie or some candy. I lost 3.5 pounds this past week. I've lost more than 17 pounds in less than two months. and it's because I'm learning to keep my food portions under control. I keep under my calorie limit. I plan ahead if I know I'm going to have a larger meal or a higher-calorie treat that day. and if it just happens without planning and I decide to take that treat? that means a longer stint at the gym to burn those extra calories off.

the ORLBs will now start sputtering, 'but that's not healthy!' and to that, I'd like to ask if being obese is healthy. I think ... no. so. let's move to basic food math:

eating less of most the food I like, keeping calories under my limit = weight loss;

weight loss = a healthier me;

therefore, eating less of most the food I like, keeping calories under my limit = a healthier me.

shedding that extra weight automatically makes you healthier, no matter what it is you are eating. there's simply no way around that fact. now, that isn't to say that you shouldn't make smart decisions. that isn't to say that you shouldn't work to find 'healthy' foods that you like, working them into your daily life. but, like weight loss, that's a process. it doesn't need to happen overnight.

focus on what works. turn yourself into a better you. and do it in a way that will allow it to be a life change. and if, for you, that means 'normal' food? do it, and do it without any of the guilt you've been programmed or pressured to feel.

[xavier 153]

I eat all food but nothing diet or low cal or fake sugar of any kind! Thanks for this post it is dearly needed. I also dont really exercise but I have made small changes I can do for life...PS: I actually like my new smaller boobs!

[JustDoIt130 369]

This is good advice. Someone said- I wish I remember who- said something to this effect- you don't have to follow all the rules all the time, just most of the rules most of the time.

This is a lifestyle change- and a physical change. I know that even if I choose to eat cake, I won't eat nearly the amount I once did, because (eventually) I'll be in the green zone and I'll be full. And I think that's great! I'm not looking to deprive. I'm looking to be healthy, to lose weight and to keep it off- with Portion Control, and being aware of what I eat. I know it's not magic, I know I have work to do, but I also know that once I do the work, it will stay done! LOL

[HeatherMarie 4]

I love this!! I laughed out loud and nodded my head in agreement. A great message for everyone. Newly banded or not. I am definately watching this topic so I can come back to read it when I need a boost.

[elcee 3,340]

I know that even if I choose to eat cake, I won't eat nearly the amount I once did

Or you might find that you choose to eat cake instead of lunch whereas before you would have had both.

[maryfran 19]

Great post! I have tried to behave only being 6 weeks out but I also know that down the line will I eat something that I just can't do without....heck yes!! If you always deny yourself something it only makes you want it more and chances are you will eat more if you try and stay away than you would if you let yourself enjoy it when you want it. Having the band makes me more aware of the portion size I can have. Thanks again

[Joyce Real 21]

Amen to that!! Reality check for many!!

[bellaloco 13]

This is a great post! After a year of struggling with the band "rules" and not losing a SINGLE pound, I joined MFP last week, and I have already lost two pounds. I could go on forever about MFP and how wonderful it is. I though I was doing great, but I was still eating way too many calories and not realizing it. MFP has been a lifesaver for me...and it's only been a week.

There are certain foods that I don't eat-not really because I choose not to, but more because I physically CAN'T eat them! I still enjoy the things I love-burgers I eat wrapped in lettuce, or with a fork and knife. Pizza-I have to eat thin crust and also eat with a fork and knife. Overall, I have changed my habits, but no one is perfect 100% of the time...I wouldn't want to live like that. A calorie is a calorie-if I want to splurge and eat something a little more on the unhealthy side, I know that I need to either skip on eating something else, or work extra hard at the gym!

Thank you for such a wonderfuly post!

[LilMissDiva Irene 3,280]

LOL

It's always so amazing to me how this even needs to be argued. It's simply unrealistic to think one will never indulge in "bad" foods. I enjoy myself, but I understand majority of the time I have to do the right thing.

IMO, its that defeatist attitude that kept getting me in trouble. Now, I just have that "bad" food and move on. So over it.

[pollywogg 17]

Fantastic post and outlook! Very refreshing to read it! Thank you!

[jennifer1 180]

i absolutley love this post. some may not agree with what i'm about to say, but i dont really care. i like the originaltor of this post eat all the "bad things", but not the same amount as before, now i havent lost 100 pounds but i'm cruising right along. i got the band so that i could eat the foods i love but in moderation. so i get the best of both worlds with m y band and make no apologies about it!!! LOL

[Brown Kameleon 15]

Thank you for this post, it keeps it real and goals attainable!!!!! This should be re-posted at least every month.

@ Xavier... I already have started emulating your band of life. If I could restrict I wouldn't need the band. I need help with Portion Control while learning to eat things in moderation. This band will do this for me. However everyone is different and each person needs to find what works for them.

[Greekie17 22]

I am really glad to read this. I am on my pre-op diet. My band surgery is scheduled for next Wed., Feb. 8th. Today I was thinking about my favorite (totally bad for you) foods ---fried chicken and chocolate and also buffalo wings- and wondering if I would ever be able to have them again. I mean, never? But your post reassured me that in moderation and with Portion Control, some of these old favorites can be part of one's new, healthier eating plan.