Regret and depressed

November 11, 2005

Hi all,

I just had my lap band op on tues and now i'm regretting my decision. Everytime i drink sometime my stomach starts to cramp and it will cramp up to hours.

I'm getting very depressed over it and has regretted my decision to have the operation.

I was b4 healthy 23 yr old but now i have no energy to even talk on the phone.

Though i dun have and vomiting episode but i can feel that my body is rejectin the band.

I cant walk or sleep properly the last few days and medication does not help at all.I cant tolerate the liquid diet at all.

I talked to my doctor abt removing the band but he said i just had and op and cant go thru another 1 so soon.

Has anyone been thru this and have the band removed successfully??? any help will be much appreciated thks

vinesqueen · November 11, 2005

Honey, you just had a major surgery. Of course you don't have energy to do anything but sleep. Your body needs to heal

You need to take small sips, not long big swallows.

You body is not rejecting the band. It is inert, and doesn't react to your body. Your body knows something is there because it is taking up extra space, but you are not rejecting the band. It simply doesn't happen.

You can get through this rough week, you can and you will. Honest.

November 11, 2005

ihave been taking small sips.... nothing seems to help.... i have been emotionally unstable and have been crying since after the surgery....

all i wana do is to get this band out....

Jachut · November 11, 2005

Its not unusual to be highly emotional after surgery anyway - I know all I do for a week after a general anaesthetic is bawl my eyes out at the drop of a hat.

Give yourself some time, what you are feeling is what I was initially most afraid of and what really made me decide for a while not to have the band. It seemed so final. But really, you now have an amazing tool to use to help you become what you want. YOu just need to give your head a bit of time to get round that fact.

Its EXTREMELY scary to think about a life where you cant use food as an emotional crutch. If you just go on a diet, you have an out, your old friend food is always there should you decide. But not with the band.

But do you want to continue with your "normal" lifestyle? Look where it's led you. This is the START of a whole new life, not the end of one! You can do it and you will have to so you may as well try to think positively. Give yourself a time frame. The band is removeable so dont panic that you've done something permanent. But you cant have another major operation so soon, not for no real reason at all. They'd only do it if your health was at risk. Give yourself say 3 months and promise to do your best till then and then reconsider. I havent been banded yet, but judging by what others here have experienced, you wont want it out.

The stomach pain will no doubt die down as you learn a new way to eat and drink. Now is probably the hardest time, but you will get through it.

NJChick · November 11, 2005

Yeah I cried on my way home from the hospital b/c I was in so much pain. I felt like crap for a few days, I mean crap. It gets better, hang in there.

When you went for your psych evaluation did they explain to you that this might happen?

chichigirl · November 11, 2005

I'm so very sorry to hear you're having such a rough time. My best advice to you at this time would be to simply pamper yourself. Don't do anything, just lay in bed or on the sofa and watch your favorite tv programs, listen to music, or watch some dvd's. Drink only Water if that's all you can tolerate, so it won't cause cramping. That actually sounds like gas, do you have any gas-x, it's an over the counter medication that everybody here swears by. Try it, what do you have to lose? Take a nice warm shower, no baths right now, but just enjoy the warmth of the Water and use some sweet smelling soap or lotion.

As for you feeling tired, that's probably because you still have anesthesia in your system. I promise you, that will go away soon and you will have a lot more energy when it does.

Sweetheart, I am so glad that you came to this site. There are many wonderful, caring and compassionate people here. We will all help you by whatever we can do to try and make things easier for you.

You are so very young, I wish I had had this option when I was your age, it would have meant such a difference in my life. Shoot, it has even helped an oldie goldie like me. I still have diabetes and heart disease, but the diabetes no longer requires insulin and I just had a stress test done and it was great!

So before you develop any of these lifelong disease, which believe me, will make you feel far worse for far longer, give your band a chance.

I am not minimizing how awful you feel right now, I wish I had a majic wand to make it all go away for you, but I don't, sorry. What I can do is offer you my prayers and good thoughts, and if you want to cry, scream, complain or anything else you can always PM me and I will always get back to you.

In the meantime, (((HUGS))).

Cindy

Firecallie · November 11, 2005

Give yourself some time. It sucks right now, but give yourself a month. Try to accept that it is in there for at least a month and can always come out given a bit more time has passed and see if in that time you come to appreciate it. The pain will subside and the scaryness of having it in you, and maybe, you just might make it start working for you. Lots of love, we are here for you if you need to vent or freak out. Think positive, it helps

lovecats85 · November 11, 2005

You will be fine - this is surgery, it takes 6 weeks to heal! I felt like crap too and was crying alot and fighting with my hubby for no reason,,,, it's depressing to hurt and be bed ridden. I could hardly get down more than a 2 oz cup of Water the 1st few days. Just do what I did - rent the entire season of Desperate Housewives and just watch that and sleep for a few days! Also, get up and walk, go outside and walk, getting outside is crucial for mental health, and walking is crucial to feeling better after being banded. It will get better and a month from now when you see the weight you've lost and you feel energetic and your clothes fit better and you can eat real food again you'll forget about the fact that the surgery sucked!

the best me · November 11, 2005

Eunice, I just read your old posts and got your name and remembered, you are from Singapore! Wow! Your online friends are here to help from the other side of the world.

I felt like crap, too. The first few days were okay for me, but I was too anxoius to heal. My stoma was still very swollen and I could hardly drink. I had no energy from the lack of calories and I felt terrible. I experienced a bit of regret, too. But I knew if I could just get through it, I'd be okay living with the band. And I was.

Rest. Walk. Take the smallest of sips all day long. Cry. Get on the computer and check in with us regularly. Can't you just feel us cheering you on?! You will make it! You can do this! You haven't told us anything that indicates that you have an abnormal surgical problem. What you are experiencing is very very normal for many of us. And I researched for months and months and was suprised by nothing.

Hang in there. It really does get better with time. Just worry about getting your fluids in and walking to get rid of the gas. (((((((HUGS))))))) You did it! Just get through this short time and soon it will be a memory.

Stay here and keep us posted on how you are felling, okay?!!!

CCBSTX · November 11, 2005

I am very glad that you logged in here for support! As the others have posted, take Gas X (worth a try), keep up the Water. You will feel weak as you just had surgery w/anethesia and you aren't getting a good level of nutrition.

Emotionality goes with surgery, for many of us. The anesthesia, pain, and changes will take a toll. Time and support helps.

Take things slow, which you probably are anyway. Get rest and walk some this week. Next Tues. you should start to feel a bit better (your one week banding).

Of course, you know your body better than we do. If you are vomiting on Water or feel severe pain, call your surgeon. Better yet, call him if you think "something isn't right." That is what he's there for.

Keep us posted. Shawn

Ohtobethin · November 11, 2005

Hang in there. Two weeks ago I felt exactly the way you are feeling right now. I thought "what in the world have I done to myself?" I had no other issues except being overweight and I do this extreme surgery. But now I am feeling better, have lost 12 pounds and am starting to get my energy back. The Dr. said the energy level is connected to the surgery and the fact I was not getting enough Protein. Now that I can eat a little more, I am getting more of what I need. Give yourself a goal of the end of the year - not very long to heal and you will be amazed at how grat you feel. Is there a support group in your area that you can go to in the near future? Good Luck.

giveyouthemoon · November 11, 2005

Okay, it sounds like maybe you gotta just take this day by day...or even hour by hour. You have to set your mind for what it is you hope to accomplish. There is a reason you chose to have this surgery. Go over those reasons with yourself. And then decide "I did this for the right reasons....and I'm going to fight like hell to do this for myself."

State of mind is a MAIN FACTOR in healing the body.

Next, close your eyes and visualize your stomach and esophagus. And visualize them being open and clear allowing liquids to pass. Visualize them being gentle and healed and no cramping. Visualize green light (a healing energy) passing clearly and easily through your esophagus and stomach.

I personally think you are very swollen from surgery and that's the issues. Perhaps your doctor can give you an anti-inflamatory and it will help.

In the meanwhile, keep trying to sip at ONLY warm liquids. Slow sips of warm broth. The warm helps make things relax in your stomach.

And stay strong. Your LBT family is here for you!

mousecrazy · November 11, 2005

I just want to say hello, and offer some support. I know it is scary at first. Keep reading about all the life changes that members here have experienced, are experiencing and are looking forward to. Read about the HOPE they have now, that they didn't have before. Slow down, take a deep breath, sip and rest. REST! You are not supposed to be up to 100%, that takes time. Is this your first surgery?

I could only drink maybe 2 0z per 15 minutes right after surgery...that seems pretty normal. I could not sleep "normally"...maye 2 hours at a time, then watched some TV, took pain meds and went back to sleep after a while. I couldn't sleep on my side, which is my preference...

Now, it has been almost 4 months, and I can sleep like I like, eat like a bandster, but I eat pretty much everything and best of all, I'm 35 lbs lighter!

Take it easy. Keep reading. Rest. YOu can do this! Cindy

tomorrowsdream · November 11, 2005

You are amongst a wonderful group of people, and lots of them have responded to you. Although I haven't been banded yet, I went with my daughter 3 years ago when she had gastric lap banding. They weren't doing the lap banding in the states yet I don't think, or I'm sure this would have been her option. She went to 3 psych evals beforehand and told me she was emotionally ready. Well, for the first 2 weeks I stayed with her and she cried and cried and regretted her decision. I don't think any amount of counseling truly can prepare you for the huge liftstyle change. After about 2 weeks she calmed down and truly began following the plan and not starving herself. Today she is a different and more confident woman. She is down over 100 lbs. and is thrilled with herself, and I am thrilled for her. I think what you are experiencing is the norm.

I went this past week and had nitrous oxide to get my teeth cleaned and afterward I was so depressed from the anesthesia it was unbelievable.

I know I don't know first-hand what you are going through, but lots here do. They are my comfort zone for when I have my surgery. I know I will be looking to people like Cindy and Jack, who are so very upbeat to get me through the difficult part, and there will be many, because I live alone with just my dog and my best friend died of cancer 2 years ago. My family is no longer right in the area, so I will be reaching out to board buddies till they are sick to death of me.

There are wonderful people here, and you have done a wonderful thing for yourself, now take a deep breath and think about your new lifestyle. Be very good to yourself and pamper yourself as everyone said. Lots have been where you are and have come around and feel great.

Please hang in there. It wasn't a rash decision to be banded and it shouldn't be a rash decision to have it removed.

You need anything, you just holler. People on here can hear you and someone will come running.

Best of luck.

HarleyNana · November 11, 2005

I also had the, OMG, what have I done syndrome, but I'm so now loving my band, through all the slimes and pb's, I love my band.

You can do it, we've all been in your shoes, you can do it and you will be so glad you did when you start wearing those smaller sizes and looking so great.