help help help

brunswick22 · October 7, 2005

I fell off the band wagon hard. I had surgery Sept 2nd did great , not one cheat. The other night I went to a restaurant with my mother and sister and had a great big salad and then a huge piece of pizza, I am SOOO down that this happened ...now i can't get back in control.

I am scheduled for my first fill next week.

The past week I have been aware that I don't feel much restriction with the band the way it is. I have lost 29 libs since the week before surgery,

I Worked out like a crazy women walking and exersizing every day and now I am like a junkie out of control....I feel like such a failure. help me somebody

Penni60 · October 7, 2005

THis is so common Brunswick. I am 18 months out and fall off the wagon every now and then. It lasts for a day or two or sometimes more. Then I come here and vent like you just did and get support like you will and pull myself up and start all over again.

This is a lifestyle change. You have to work it. It sucks at times. It is hard as hell and you just want it to be over with soon. But the key is, we fight this every second of every minute of every hour of every day. And will continue to fight this for the rest of our lives. How you chose to accept that and deal with it is your mission on this journey.

Yeah that sucks too. LOL!!!

Thank GOD that we have this wonderful tool to help us along the way. Without this tool lots of us might not be here today to talk about PB'ing, slippage, fills, etc.

Know that you are not alone on this journey. We are all here for you and some of us are travelling on the same bumpy ride right beside you. We can pick each other up and brush each other off and start again.

Hope this helps!

PS: One slice of pizza and a salad. Think of what you would have had before being banded.

La_madam · October 7, 2005

We all fall off the wagon...I'm 18 months postop and have fallen off, the key is to know when to get back up!

The great thing about the band is those times when you have fallen off the wagon, NOT much damage is done! So you had 1 slice of pizza, bet you it is about 3-4 less slices then you would of eaten had you not had your band. Do not get down on yourself..tomorrow is a new day...PROTEIN Protein PROTEIN..You can do it!

lovecats85 · October 7, 2005

Exactly what La Madam said - I don't think one peice of pizza is falling off the wagon! I could probably have eaten 3/4 pizza 2 weeks ago! If I only eat one peice now I'll feel blessed!!! I hope i lose 29 pounds in 5 weeks! Also, I think you're totally normal b/c my doc says you shouldn't have a fill for 6 weeks so your band can heal but that most people feel NO restriction w/out a fill so you'll get your fill and lose another 30 lbs by the holidays!!! Good for you!

brunswick22 · October 7, 2005

But I just feel like crying about it. I even went to mcdonalds today and had a fish filet !!!

I gueaa my band isn't tight enough or i couldn't have eaten the filet and a sundae.

Its like all or nothing for me ..if I slip at all I go on a binge.

I feel hopeless tonight.

I eed to go out in the kitchen and force myself to have a Protein supplematn drink and get back on track.

please god give me strenght

I think about food and fight the urge contantly.

I feel so bad for drug addicts. I know how they feel

jqpublic · October 7, 2005

Don,t feel to bad as Im reading this I am eating alarge bowl of "kashi "Cereal that is high in Protein Fiber with a hand full fruit & nut trail mix.....SO IF YOUR GOING TO CHEAT EAT(HEALTHY) I just started to lose weight again ,and I did this Thats life! I just read in the mens journal that you should cheat one time a week? Idid. well good luck you can win this battle.

Its all a mind game! well have to go burn off some of these calories..JohnQ

(SOME PEOPLES ADDICTION IS FOOD!) THERE ONLY WAY OF DEALING WITH STRESS IS food.

Alexandra · October 8, 2005

I gueaa my band isn't tight enough or i couldn't have eaten the filet and a sundae.
Its like all or nothing for me ..if I slip at all I go on a binge.

First of all, are you kidding me? A fish filet and a McDonald's sundae (which are minuscule) is what you call A BINGE?? Girl, you have NOTHING to worry about.

Secondly, you don't have any fill, right? It's absolutely, perfectly, completely and utterly normal to feel hungry and even a little out of control at this point. You're not experiencing any obvious restriction from your band so your hunger and capacity are close to where they were pre-band. This is the hard part, to be sure, but don't worry about it and don't beat yourself up! Look at where you've gotten--to the point where a fish filet and four ounces of ice cream feel like a binge!

You're fine. You'll be a wonderful success, just be a little easier on yourself.

Mita · October 8, 2005

You are being way to hard on yourself. You are not doing bad at all - One thing that says so is what you are ordering. It will all come in good time.. Take care

HunnyBun · October 8, 2005

A few months ago when I went on a binge I would eat:

Bowl of Cereal with whole milk

Two sandwiches with ham and mayo

A large slice of chocolate cake with frosting

A big cup of mocha with whipped cream

Half a package of chocolate chip Cookies

A hot dog

In that order, took no more than an hour to consume all of this too!

Plus, wash it all down with two large glasses of coca cola.

A slice of pizza or a sunday and fish filet isn't bad.

Kathy473 · October 8, 2005

I know how you feel. I so want to just gorge myself right now because I happen to be on my first period after having the band and I have the munchies so bad it is killing!!!! I want choclate so bad and I know that I could have a chocolate Protein Shake or some fat-free chocolate pudding but that is not what I want. I want a handful of Reese's or a Snickers...anything full of crap that I know that I should not have. I am going to a wedding tonight and I have already told myself that I will have that piece of wedding cake but only a few bites! Just enough to get a taste and put me on the verge of guilt and that should be enough. I have done pretty well and I am so shocked that I have done well but I too can remember eating 3 slices of pizza and a coke...pushing away the thought of a salad and having the dessert pizza instead! My daughter had a cinnamon roll for Breakfast this morning and I had a small bite and actually felt bad for that but it was just a taste and I got over it. Don't feel bad for what you ate just know that it is ok to have a few things that you want as long as you do not over do it and make a better decision the next time. My doctor put me on a low-carb diet before the surgery and I am so anti-bread it is not funny. I also go to McDonald's and get the Filet-O Fish sandwich and I take off the bread and have part of a salad with it. So next time just don't eat the bread and if you go to a pizza place just take off the cheese and meat off the pizza and leave the bread. There is no harm in eating the toppings, just the bread. How did you feel after you had the bread? I bet you were so full...I couldn't imagine eating it now. But like everyone else is telling you...don't beat yourself up over it remember what you could put down before the band...I do...and it is still hard to believe it!

lovecats85 · October 8, 2005

Maybe I will end up being a slow loser b/c of this but I will not punish myself for having some candy when I'm PMSing or 1 fish sandwhich when I go to McDonalds. I know you are frustrated with yourself but let's focus on 2 things here - 1. what would you have binged on preband, and 2. my doc says 95% people have NO restriction before the 1st fill. Which means if anything you have NO restriction and still probably binged WAY LESS than you would have pre-band. If anything you should be proud of that!

the best me · October 8, 2005

Maybe I will end up being a slow loser b/c of this but I will not punish myself for having some candy when I'm PMSing or 1 fish sandwhich when I go to McDonalds. I know you are frustrated with yourself but let's focus on 2 things here - 1. what would you have binged on preband, and 2. my doc says 95% people have NO restriction before the 1st fill. Which means if anything you have NO restriction and still probably binged WAY LESS than you would have pre-band. If anything you should be proud of that!

Yes, and what everyone else said.

brunswick, jq said it's a head game and it is. And lovecats, maybe I"M a slow loser with this thinking. But it's working for me, however slowly. I am still losing and I feel great and when I'm sick of not doing as well as I know I can, I kick myself in the butt and get in gear.

brunswick, be careful of the 'all or nothing" syndrome. You will end up feeling soooooo bad about a dumb ole fish filet sandwich you will ruin the rest of the week, or worse! If you are going to eat it, own it. Decide and do it and move on. I have to tell myself, "Okay, I'm PMSing, I want a Snickers bar!!! so I'll eat one mini-snickers a day for the next few days, rather than a whole big bar all at once, and then when I know I have had enough, I won't eat anymore until next month. And NO WHINING!!!!!" So I do that, and something in me says, okay, you have had your binge of daily mini-snickers, time to put them away and get back on track. NO WHINING!!! I tell myself. Eat it and own it. If you don't want to own it, don't eat it. No whining.

Pull yourself together, girl! No biggie. Time to move forward. Play that mind game, get into the Zone of eating right, and do your best. And get that first fill, it will do wonders for your self-control. (((hugs)))

Fauxnaif · October 8, 2005

All I can say is it can be really really really reallly hard at the beginning. It takes time to get this thing figured out. But it does get easier. Forgive yourself, rejoice in your successes and move on.

Parvathi · October 9, 2005

Just echoing what everyone else said. It's no big deal, pick yourself up and move on You'll be fine!

cnicholl · October 9, 2005

I am in the same boat as you... it seems that eating anything off the "healthy diet" imposed by the lap band is "BAD"... but I had a few bad moments too... and at then end of the day, I totalled up my calories, just to see how "BAD" I was... 1230 calories...

Every sheet of info I have on dieting says not to go below 1200... so my "BAD" day I had 30 calories more than the lowest I should... thats not "BAD"... and I have totalled BAD days pre-banded and they can go OVER 4000 CALORIES... so 1230 is nothing... in the scheme of things you have postponed losing a pound(3600 calories) by a 1/2 hour... And you have lost so much already, so trust that even the minor slips will be just that - minor. And compare what a pre-band binge was compared to what you eat now... absolutely astounding... and somewhat humourous.