Fear of the yo-yo

balletgirl · June 26, 2009

I've been banded since Sept 24, 2008 and now have lost 60 pounds. I have 15 more to go until my goal weight. Things are going great, but now that I'm used to eating healtier and smaller meals, I'm fighting mental anguish.

I am a compulsive-overeater (now I guess they call it binge eating). My disease hasn't gone away with the lap band. Therapy has helped, but still my mind plays head games with me every day, all day long.

I have lost more weight than I have in 25 years - since the birth of my oldest child so I'm alittle freaked out when I look in the mirror and see this body that I haven't seen in 25 years!

My fear??? The yo-yo thing again. As I am sure many of you have experienced (that's why we did this right?) there is always this nagging in the back of the mind of gaining it all back! Yes, I know the band is a tool, but I still am so fearful that something will go wrong and that I'll just gain it all back again! To believe this is permanent is scary for me. Somehow I think that in the future something will go wrong with the band - erosion, slippage, etc. and they'll have to take it out and bam - there I go back to being obese.

I did say I have an eating disorder so you can see where my obsessive thought is. I've explained this to my therapist, but I am not sure she truly understands my fear - she had me read a book "feel the fear and do it anyway".

Why am I writing? I guess I just need some support and understanding from people who may be feeling the fear of the yo-yo thing too.

Is there anyone here who has been banded for years that can reasure me that I won't yo-yo? I AM so much happier eating healthy! I am getting comments now from family and friends about how skinny I am. Now they ask - when are you going to stop loosing weight! You're skinny enough! (No, I'm fine by the BMI and CAN loose more weight). These comments don't help. I tell them I eat lots of fruits and veggies - which you should anyway! and they still tell me I'm too skinny. Sheesh. The mental anguish!

Sorry I'm rambling....you can see my mind is really messing with me....:thumbup:

naynayto2 · June 26, 2009

I know how you feel because I have the same thoughts. I keep thinking this is not permanent, something will go wrong and I'll have to have it removed. Sometimes I have a problem being positive but when you have lost and gained as many times as I have you kinda get that way.

Lets just try to stay postive and enjoy the present and not worry about the future!!!

ParrotheadCathy · June 26, 2009

So many of us have done the yo-yo thing! And I think most of us worry about it to some degree (some more than others). Here's my thinking.

1) The band doesn't "expire" and will continue to help me limit my portions long after I reach goal.

2) If, God forbid, something were to go wrong with my band in the future, I think I would simply revise to a Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy.

3) Check Jachut here on this board! She lives in Australia and has had wonderful success and I admire her and her wisdom about lilving with your band.

4) Those people who tell you that you're getting to be too skinny have a little bit of the same problem we have: They are looking through fat glasses (remember "beer glasses"??)...You remember all too well what FAT was like and by comparison of course anything is an improvement. And once you get close to your personal goal many see it as close enough. The ones who comment mean well, they really do. Just thank them for the compliment and move on. It doesn't require a discussion because in the end, you will do what you believe is best for you.

And the one thing I've done that I recommend highly is that once something is too loose, I GET RID OF IT! Yeah, all of us clothes horders who had bins and bags and closets full of half a dozen sizes -- Stop That! If you don't have any bigger clothes to dig out and wear if you were to gain 10 pounds should be an inspiration at least to stick with this. So far, for me, it has worked.