Who have you told about your surgery? Why?

[irishgal 0]

When I decided to have the surgery my sister was the first person I told. I waited until after all my pre-surgical testing was complete and had the date scheduled. Then, I told my other siblings, their spouses, and my parents. All have been incredibly supportive. My oldest brother is a family practioner. He called every day after my surgery to check on me and continues to call every few days. I know he has been a great source of comfort to my parents too.

My best friend lives out of state. Of course, I shared the news with her. As luck would have it she was in town the weekend before my surgery. She got to see the 'before' picture of me in person. She too has been incredibly supportive. She struggles with her weight so we share tips and food suggestions with each other.

The only two other people I've told are a friend from church and one of my coworkers. I just went to lunch with another coworker. We got to talking about the new year's resolution weight loss goals. Through the course of our conversation I told her I was working with a nutritionist.

I don't feel comfortable sharing my surgery with everyone in my life. I know people will be supportive. I choose to let them be supportive of my new eating habits - without knowing about the surgery.

What about you? Who have you told? Why? Do you regret telling anyone? Just curious.

Thanks for sharing.

[luluc 6]

I don't feel comfortable sharing my surgery with everyone in my life. I know people will be supportive. I choose to let them be supportive of my new eating habits - without knowing about the surgery.

What about you? Who have you told? Why? Do you regret telling anyone? Just curious.

Thanks for sharing.

was banded with my husband - we told nobody.

after month 6, when i finally started to lose weight did i tell my parents - brothers. to date, that's all that knows ... other than here on LBT.

hubby is pretty private, so we have kept it to ourselves and almost 15 months out i don't regret it. we were able to do the journey together w/out the watchful eyes or food police. it' made it very manageable because i was a slow loser.....hubby not so much; he lost much faster.

i'd be inclined to tell a stranger about the journey rather than friends/family....not concerned about their opinion - i also didn't need it.

[LeAnne19 0]

I have told everyone. I continue to tell everyone, from waiters and waitresses to fitting room workers at department stores. It felt like the right thing for me to do. I am really proud of my band and my progress. In my experience I have never recieved any negative feed back. Most people who know me, knew I couldn't have lost the weight on my own.

I was also banded with my Mother, the same day. Very good experience. It was nice to always have her going threw different stages.

It is a very personal decision whether to tell or not. I do not think any answer is right or wrong.

[LSF 264]

My mother told everyone! I told my boss and a couple of my co-workers, then found myself telling more co-workers because of my limitations after surgery. Everyone has been SO supportive. At times, I wish I had not told anyone since I am losing slowly but every time I mention it - the response is that they know someone who had it done and was very successful.

[RestlessMonkey 7]

I'm a teller. I've told everyone. It's just not in my nature to be secretive or "on the QT" about it. I understand some people don't want to tell, but that mindset is pretty foreign to me. They can tell I'm fat just by looking! I've invariably gotten positive feedback from everyone, and have never regretted "telling".

I will say this...those who know me know I'm pretty smart and independent and when I make up my mind to do something, they know I'm doing what I think is best for me. So I didn't figure anyone would try to talk me out of it or second guess me. However, since I am pretty smart and independent, if they had, it wouldn't have bothered me any, either. The only person I felt needed to be "on board", besides me, was my husband. (we're a team and he's kind of in it with me) Otherwise, I told, not really caring if anyone approved or not. Guess that may be my "secret". :biggrin:

Edited January 2, 2009 by RestlessMonkey

[slimcolagirl 0]

I tried to tell a friend, who said I didn't need it and wants to start cooking low fat meals with me instead. Also tried to tell my mom, who stayed up all night crying and told me she couldn't bare to lose her only child in surgery. I let them both think I changed my mind about the procedure... but I'll be banded on Jan 9th in Tijuana, Mexico.

I'm lower BMI and being banded outside the US. There are a lot of people who would stop me in my tracks if I told them what I was doing. It's a risk I am willing to take and I'm so excited about it. My husband is behind me all the way and I appreciate his support, but I won't be telling ANYONE else about this procedure for a while.

I agree with luluc completely... better to do this without the watchful eyes of others, especially if I lose slowly. Also its kind of cool to have this juicy secret tucked away from others. If I lose a LOT, I'll just tell them that I was banded and didn't want anyone to worry. Easy as pie.

[SunnyRachel 7]

Hi!

Well, obviously my husband knew first. Second was my mom because she wanted me to do this, and I was like a cat trying not to be thrown into the toilet. She is enough cheerleader to make up for the rest of the family. I told one best friend I could trust that wouldn't judge me or talk about me to others...and one good friend that I don't see that often because she is wise and fun, and I can tell her stuff like that. That's all!

Everyone else I know would either harp on it every time I see them, be negative, or say nothing at all and make me feel bad... so it is better this way. What I'm actually finding funny is going out to eat and barely eating it and the waitress going, "Is that all you ate?" Yeah, I left the napkin and table in once piece this time, Jo!! ha ha ha

At first I thought it would be hard not to talk about it or to keep my mouth shut for so long...but I'm finding it very easy to just go about my business and follow my rules and nobody really has questioned me yet. It's just the beginning though. Wait until they see me next year! he he he

[lucyavery 0]

I guess in thinking about this question, I have told lots of people. All my family, some people at church, friends and neighbors. At first I was not tellng a lot of people, only family, but my husband was telling lots of people and he told me to be proud of it...so I went with it.

I'll tell people and talk about it with those who I am close too and those who ask. However, I don't tell total strangers unles it comes up in converstation.

[amberstar 1]

I told my husband first, because he would be paying for it! lol. I didn't tell anyone else until I had my surgery date. And then I only told my aunt who was having the surgery also and my mom and my BFF. that's it. Honestly I was very embaressed that my life had become so out of control that I had to have weight loss surgery. So I didn't want anyone to know. But after a month or so after the surgery, I did feel comfortable telling more family members and a couple friends. But to this day alot of people in my life do not know... the embaressment has gone away but I still want to keep it private just so I don't feel like they're all watching and waiting on every pound I lose! ha

[littlefroggy 0]

I told almost everyone. I don't tell strangers so much, but I'm so happy that when I meet people who are struggling w/ their weight I tell them about what I've gone through. It's not a secret.

the only people who don't know are the parents of the students in my class. All my co-workers, boss, etc. know as well as friends and family.

[Susanbee 0]

At first I didn't tell anyone. I wanted to make my decision without input from others. Before surgery I told my family and discussed what I was doing. I even took my daughter (22) to a banding seminar so she would know more about it. That make her feel a lot better about the situation. After surgery I told those that asked. And now I tell anyone that will listen. I live in a small town so people notice when you drop 75 pounds and they want to know about the "magic". So I'm happy to discuss the band with them.

[tapshoes 2]

I told DH - someone had to drive me home from the clinic! Other than that, no one. No reason to tell anyone either. 'Tis no one's business.

[colorado.girl80 8]

I have told lots of people. I am so excited about it and know that its the right thing for me to do so I dont feel any need to keep it a secret. I havent told everyone I work with but I might after I have it.

[sandra267 0]

At first I wasn't going to tell anyone, but then one day I just started telling everyone. That was the right decision for me. If I was going to Mexico to have it done, I don't think I would have told too many people. There are alot of people that do not understand what medical treatment is like outside of this country.

[BeckyinTn 0]

My husband, and my side of the family knows. My husband's side does not. I chose not tell them because that are not the most supportive bunch of people.

As far as friends, co-workers and neighbors. The ones I know that would be supportive and could trust know the others who like to run their mouths and are negitive do not.