Anybody's spouse an "eating buddy"?

DesertRose · October 2, 2008

Oh yes, been there and done that. After I was banded, I had to hide in my bedroom for a whole week (mostly recovering) to avoid the smells coming from the kitchen. My normal weight husband went right on and continues on eating the way he always has. Before my surgery, we loved to curl up in the bed with a good movie, a bag of popcorn and a whole bag of M&M's. I was actually 'grieving' for those times, LOL. Now I am trying to find other things to do while he Snacks away. Arrrgh...

I'm cooking healthier, but that does not stop him from bringing the sweets into the house. Tonight I came home from work and there was a 2 litre of soda sitting on the counter. I don't touch it anymore, but what IF it were a huge temptation for me? Does he not think? On top of that, we have a 14 yr old daughter in the house....kids and soda...it's like liquid candy to them. I feel like chucking it out into the back yard just to show him how serious I am about keeping it out of the house. What can ya do?

tapshoes · October 2, 2008

DH and I both love to eat and love to cook. food was a major part of our relationship, and that hasn't changed. I still do a lot of baking; I just don't eat any of it. I put it in individual servings, and pop it into the freezer, and when DH wants something sweet, he gets it out and enjoys. DH still cooks a lot; we eat it, just in smaller portions. I decided at the beginning that this surgery would not be like a diet with eliminating foods from my diet or the house. Everything is allowed, just in portions.

We never did go out to eat a lot - we both can cook better food for less at home. I have upped my activities; DH has not, but that's ok. We don't have to do everything together, and we each benefit from having our own interests.

Now into my 8th month, this is working for us.

BethFromVA · October 2, 2008

Oh wow, thanks for filling me in y'all! :cool2:

Yes, the seminar WAS informative. I got a bit... disgusted... with one woman who, when it was listed what some people may not be able to eat, exclaimed to her friend, "PASTA??" They were the first ones to leave when the seminar was over. Guess they were looking for that magic cure-all which allows us to keep doing what we are doing and lose tons of weight. :laugh:

I have set up an appointment to begin the process next week. Well, actually I secured the date. This doctor is not in my network, though his father is. This doctor does these operations exclusively, so that is a plus, but I will talk to one of their office personnel who does the insurance to see what my out-of-pocket would be if I DO use him, not being in my network.

Still have not told hubby what I'm contemplating. He's a bit perplexed that I am being so silent. I told him last night I needed to get all MY information together first before I started potentially dealing with HIS negativity and BS...

Saundra · October 2, 2008

I had some of the same thoughts as you. My hubby isn't skinny but if he lost 20 he would be pushing it. Since I started the 1200 calorie diet what I've been doing is say when I buy chciken I measure it out, more him and less for me, freeze it and when its time to cook its all good. We have eaten out a few times, we've done the sharing and he adds a salad and sides, we both we full and he wasn;'t deprived, and I ate wise. If he wants something thats a no no or not on my list, he can have it, I just eat something else. Theres no hanging out in front of the tube with a bag of doughnuts now, but we are still tigether when we watch tv. He knows how much this means to me and that it will make me healthier. My sister who has been overweight even longer than myself but is younger is just now seeing some of the heath problems knock at her door. Shes never been able to loose so she wants me to ne the guinea pig and if it works for me then get it done for herself. I think she'd be doing it sooner but right now shes looking at a hysterectomy and a few other things first. Someone pointed out that most oner weight females are givers, strong need to please, and so on. If we don't get this weight off now, we may not be around to worry about anyone elses needs. Sorry if that seems morbid but for a lot of us its the truth.

ThinWithin · October 2, 2008

I can identify with so many aspects of this thread. My husband was thin when we married and I was already overweight, we've been married for 13 1/2 years and I've put on about 120lbs. I never gained a huge amount at once but a little bit constantly. We are eaters and celebrate/entertain with food. Heck, I have a cake business! lol Food is a habit for us. Get the kids to bed? Okay grab a snack and watch tv. Every night. I am curious to see how it plays out once I am banded. He isn't overweight but could stand to lose a little weight himself. I think this might be the catalyst we need to change our habits. It is so awesome to hear other people with similar situations. My husband is incredibly supportive and I am really excited to take this journey knowing he is there to hold my hand along the way.