I am more than depressed right now. I am still in complete denial and shock. BUT I know, I have no one to blame but myself. I had the un-fill 6 weeks ago now. It was due to a slip that the surgeon caused when my port was replaced.

Well I thought I was doing well, but the last few weeks I knew I had gained a few pounds. Things weren't fitting the same. I went to the Dr today for strep. The same place that saw me last month for the broken nose. Well guys I have gained 11 pounds. 11 freaking pounds. I want to cry and give up completely.

I have NOT been eating shit. I have been eating the same things, but a bit more. I have been so stressed out lately I am surprised I haven't gained more. Makes me pissed off I haven't had a freaking King Dong. I haven't had any of the shit I used to eat, so what the hell happened?

I need to get this weight off before I throw myself off a cliff but being bogged down taking care of a sick Grandmother I don't see it happening. I will be getting a fill Friday and starting over.

I am ashamed but I think I have to tell all of you, and that makes me ever more ashamed and disgusted with myself. I suck. I am so upset right now I can't even deal with this....

:teeth_smile:

BBK:

You don't suck! YOu've been unfilled which means that you couldn't use your weight loss tool. So, don't be so hard on yourself. When you're filled you'll drop those 11 pounds off in no-time. I was recently unfilled and gained 5 pounds in 5 days, but luckily I took them back off in two days by practically starving myself. I'm sure that's not good for a person's body. Being unfilled sucks. I'm guessing that's why they don't unfill everyone when they reach goal. We are "foodaholics" and we need the restriction that our bands give to us.

Have a positive attitude and you can drop those pounds just like you did before. Don't forget, it may take more than one fill to get the restriction back.

Take care and focus on the positive. Look how far you've come. You're a lap band star!

Sue

Hi there Boo Boo, I havent had my op yet, but I can see where you are coming from, A lot of it may be down to stress, start a new week a fresh, have the refil and start over, have some YOU time if you are able to, I know when I am like this, I either Swim (very relaxing) have a nice massage (or even get someone to give you one), pedicure and go to the salon and treat yourself. Dont think about the weight going on, just think, I know I can get it off because I have been down this road before.

Start now, you know you can do it hun!!!!

Thanks guys. I can not wait until Friday, I have never wanted a week to be over more.

I have to wait until Monday for my second fill. :thumbup:

I know what you are going thru bc I had to starting over with a new bigger band and now I feel the hunger like I did before surgery. Its SCARY! I think I fooled myself that I bc I had lost weight that I had self control and wouldnt gain. Guess it true that this is a life long battle not matter what stage you are at

I have to wait until Monday for my second fill. :thumbup:

I know what you are going thru bc I had to starting over with a new bigger band and now I feel the hunger like I did before surgery. Its SCARY! I think I fooled myself that I bc I had lost weight that I had self control and wouldnt gain. Guess it true that this is a life long battle not matter what stage you are at

EXACTLY what I had thought. I am not eating crap but just more food, and I freaking hate feeling this hungry. SUCKS..

Thanks for the support guys. :thumbup:

Dear Boo Boo Kitty,

Don't let it get you down. You've just been through a change to your whole re-learned eating-losing routine.

Having only been banded for a month, I'm probably the last one who should be handing out advice, but you may want to try reverting back to the presurgical diet until your fill. It might help to break your current eating pattern and put you back on a weightloss track until you get your fill.

Don't loose heart. You've made such amazing progress and 11 pounds isn't very much considering where you started.

Bryan

Hang in there, BBK! You CAN get through this! You are a very strong person, don't forget that.

There is a reason we get the band, we're fat and we have food issues! We're hungry! Being completely un-filled is like never having had the surgery to begin with. You remember what that was like! That's what pisses you off! I know you don't want to go there or be there but right now you have to be. At this point the only thing you can do is go by sheer will-power and strength to do what you need to do.

I don't know if it'd help but can you increase your veggie intake? It would help fill you up with a smaller calorie load.

Considering where you started and where you are now, it's polar-opposites. You aren't that person anymore. You will NOT gain all of that weight back. You just plain won't. It will piss you off too much to allow that to happen. In all honesty, considering what you're going through (had NO idea about the broken nose! Please be ok!), 11lbs is really not that much in the grand scheme of things. You will get your tool back and be able to drop that weight in no time.

In the meantime, try to give yourself a break. You've got enough stress right now without intentionally adding more to yourself. We are our hardest critics (except maybe your mom!! Sorry, had to add that! Please laugh!). We need to let ourselves be human. We allow everyone else to be!

Take good care of yourself. Eat as healthy as you can right now. Don't give in too much to the cravings or the f' its and get carried away. We can all do anything for one week! Remember liquids???

Hang in there and lots of hugs!

Hey BBK - Just wanted to say that probably it's good to know now, at 11 lbs, than at 15 or 17 or 20 lbs, right? (Looking on the bright side, here!). You know you can lose the weight, but as someone else suggested, without the tool it's nigh unto impossible. Unless you go back to shakes until Friday? Horrible as it sounds, at least that will keep you at a known caloric intake, rather than letting you slip in a few more calories by not measuring/weighing.

But really, just wanted to say you most definitely do not suck, you've done an amazing job with the band and you are a role model for a lot of us who still have miles (er, pounds) to go. I have confidence in you, and I'm sure I'm not the only one. :cool2:

Lisa

Thanks everyone. I appreciate the support. You are all keeping me from jumping into a batch of proverbial King Dongs.... (JUST SAY NO, JUST SAY NO!) :smile:

I truly need all of you! :cool2:

Oh, Boo Boo...Hang in there just like the Kitty in the poster doing pull-ups. You are a wonderful insporation to all of us. You made me relize I need a fill. I have restricted in the am but...what made me think just a little bowl of ice cream or a small piece of Birthday cake would not do any harm. We are a group of people that need to relize we can not eat like "regular" people. We really need very little food to sustain our bodies. Thats why I love my little "RUBBER BAND"

I

BBK - I can't imagine having to go through that, but you are a pro, you can handle it! That does suck though.

I think the pre-op diet idea sounds like a good one.

I have stalled for the first time and haven't lost in a month. I don't even know what to blame, but I'm getting a fill on the 10th and I'm hoping that will put me back on track.

Hang in there! We all look up to you!

You don't suck, you don't need to be ashamed and you can get through this.

I have followed your journey and been inspired by you for over a year now and I have to say you have had an incredibly difficult time over the last months and you are only human. I would almost guarantee that your body is reacting to the stress you have been under by holding on to everything you are putting into it. If you think about it, 11 pounds in 6 weeks is not really fat gain (just like losing 5 pounds in a week is not really fat loss). The scales are telling you that your body composition is off by 11 pounds. I would think that much of that weight is Water retention and it will come off again when you are able to get more balance back into your life.

Think about it another way - at your current weight and size -11 pounds of fat would mean that not only would your clothes "not fit the same", they wouldn't fit at all.

Take a couple of deep breathes - find your happy place and make a plan to help yourself de-stress and get back to basics. The weight will come off if you don't panic and give into the King Dongs!!!

Jacquie

You don't suck, you don't need to be ashamed and you can get through this.

I have followed your journey and been inspired by you for over a year now and I have to say you have had an incredibly difficult time over the last months and you are only human. I would almost guarantee that your body is reacting to the stress you have been under by holding on to everything you are putting into it. If you think about it, 11 pounds in 6 weeks is not really fat gain (just like losing 5 pounds in a week is not really fat loss). The scales are telling you that your body composition is off by 11 pounds. I would think that much of that weight is Water retention and it will come off again when you are able to get more balance back into your life.

Think about it another way - at your current weight and size -11 pounds of fat would mean that not only would your clothes "not fit the same", they wouldn't fit at all.

Take a couple of deep breathes - find your happy place and make a plan to help yourself de-stress and get back to basics. The weight will come off if you don't panic and give into the King Dongs!!!

Jacquie

THAT is a great post, Jacquie! Well said.

Thanks everyone. I went for the fill Friday and got 1.0 cc back in my band. I am truly amazed by the difference I feel. I am not starving 24/7. I can eat smaller portions again. I know that I am not at my sweet spot, but at this point it feels damn good to have anything at all in it.

So far it is gone well, so we are assuming the slip has fixed itself. There is one on my side for once! :thumbup:

:tt2:

Thanks everyone. I went for the fill Friday and got 1.0 cc back in my band. I am truly amazed by the difference I feel. I am not starving 24/7. I can eat smaller portions again. I know that I am not at my sweet spot, but at this point it feels damn good to have anything at all in it.

So far it is gone well, so we are assuming the slip has fixed itself. There is one on my side for once! :thumbup:

:tt2:

That's good to hear, Brandy. I'm praying the slip is taken care of. Keep us up to date!