I need help....

[CajunCutie 1]

I have over 200 pounds to lose. I haven't posted here in a long time because I am embarrassed.

A little history on me: I had my surgery on 12/19/07. At first I lost about 15 pounds. Now however, I am back to what I was before surgery. I have been gaining and losing the same 10 pounds over the last 9 months. My surgeon said my band is "almost too tight". Nothing is wrong with my band. The problem is me. I have wanted to lose weight for a very long time. I made the decision to get lap-band with the dream of reaching my goal. 9 months with the band I feel that I am a lost cause. I have even considered getting the bypass surgery. But, I know that will not work because my issues are all in my head. I use food for comfort.

My question is, how do I just do it? Fight the head issues, and just use my "tool" to help me lose weight...

[IM_LORI 0]

Oh girl, you must feel miserable. THe band works successfully for 40% of the people. So the odds are not in your favor. Fortunately I landed in there. Are you sure your too tight? Are you getting stuck on food? Unless you are, you maybe have a little flexibility for a fill still. ALWAYS ALWAYS eat your Proteins first. At every meal. 3 times a day. After you finish, then allow the rest of the meal. Most of the time you should be too full to finish the higher carb items. EAT YOUR SNACKS! Morning, afternoon, evening, a fruit, or some nuts. Do not drink. Review all your basics and jump back to it. Do a fill, do a week of liquids, and get back on track. If it just doesn't work, realize you still have other options, sleeve, r n Y, duodenal switch, etc...

Don't feel like you failed though, because the band does not work for every person.

[IM_LORI 0]

Comfort foods:

sugar free hot cocoa

warm chicken broth

sugar free Jello

sugar free hard candies

coffee with 1 pkg Equal and 1 Tlb Sugar free Hazelnut Creamer

Diet Root Beer with some 1/2 & 1/2 in it, fiz removed, over ice :biggrin:

sugar free popsicles, 5 at a time! Done that! I too like to eat 24/7

[Cherlita 0]

CajunCutie I feel your pain. I also use food for comfort or to "relieve stress".

I was banded 11.27.07 and have lost 60 lbs so far and had to fight myself for that all the way. I had a jones for ice cream over the summer, finally broke that habit. I read about other people who have dropped 100 lbs is less than a year and I am so envious, but I know that I am the one controlling my own destiny.

Several things have helped me. First and foremost, I finally have perfect restriction; got it with my last fill last friday. I get full on 4-5 bites. I had one egg this morning and it was perfect.

I was/am a fast food junkie. I loved my fast food, well, after my last fill I had to test it, so I went thru my favorite fast food drive-thru and was only able to eat only half of the small french fry order and I was full, as in done, not another bite. I'm not wasting anymore money on fast food. But that jones will always be there for me, so I have to be vigilant and not carry money or my credit card with me, so I can't buy anything.

I also have a jones for sweet things. Well I cannot eat any bread items, won't pass thru my band, they come back up so I absolutely don't want to lose my band from slippage. So no more bread items.

I have created a few treats that I use to satisfy my sweet tooth. I'll post the recipes here for your later. I don't have them with me right now.

You are the only one who can do this. We can help support you, but bottom line, it's up to you to succeed. :thumbup:

Cherlita

[Anita Sue 0]

My exercise coach recommended that I see the therapist at the Baratric Center, where they have the 'team' for the patients. I had a lot of 'head-heart hunger,' too.

It's almost at if I feel that I don't deserve to be thin. It's a struggle, but it so nice to have even the 40 lbs. gone. One pound a week. We can do that. We must do that. My doctor told me that they don't have patients over 60 that are as heavy as me, because they don't live being this heavy to over 60. So, I'm doing my best, could be better, but with the right therapy, motivation, exercise, support and a lot of prayer, I believe I can do this! And I'll pray for you that you will, too!

[Oregondaisy 2,019]

You have come to the right place. It's good that you know that the gastric bypass is not the answer for you. They do lose massive amounts of weight in the beginning, but just about everyone I know that has had that surgery, has gained the weight back. They don't fix what is in their head.

You have to try to give up sweets. Eating sweets just makes us crave more sweets. It's really hard. I battle it every day. Just keep coming here for support and people will tell you what has worked for them.

try getting the book "The Beck Diet Solution" It's not a diet. It teaches you a way to learn to battle head hunger. It helped me a lot.

[livn4jesus 0]

Cutie: As Denise said you've come to the right place. I don't post here much but read here everyday. It has really been a big help to me. For me living with the band is a way of life. Are you exercising and do you have a support system in place?

You can do this, we all have faith in you but more importantly you have to have faith in yourself. Does your surgeons office have a support group? If they do get involved with the group. You need to live eat and sleep your band and this lifestle.

Good Luck-we're all here if you need anything.

Susan

[Liz1531 3]

IM Lori, you are the first person I've heard say the band doens't work for everyone and not to beat ourselves up over it. Thank you!!! I've also had the band over a year and have only lost about 10 lbs. Really more like 20, but I keep gaining/losing the last ten. I spent $8,500 on a surgery that hasn't worked for me. I can hardly eat anything, certainly no rice, bread or Pasta. I eat a fraction of what I did before and yet the weight is still here! Now, I am afraid my band has slipped as it's extremly painful for me to even get liquids down right now. Live and learn I suppose.

[jules1299 0]

Hi Cutie,

I had my surgery right after you on 12/26/07. I have lost 84 lbs, but please understand, I have written everything that I have ate since surgery down in a journal. I follow the weight watchers program. The lap band is a tool for me but not a quick fix. I have worked out every day (minus a few) since the middle of January. I hit a plateau and got stuck around 300. To get out of the plateau my sister and I started meeting at the local track at 4:30am. I have a four year old and she has a three and six year old. We are losing sleep to get healthy. It has been hard to do, but we walk 1 hour (3 or more miles) every day. Some days I pull double workouts. You have to work to loose the weight. Get to work, start journaling, start exercising. You can do it!

[Oregondaisy 2,019]

Liz you need to get checked out if you are having trouble with liquids. You don't want to mess your stomach up. It sounds like you are tight or have swelling. You should call your doctor.

[jjsmiles 3]

Most of us have really big head issues that have defeated us over the years. I think one of the keys is to figure out how to work with your strengths and your head rather than just beating yourself up. Therapy has been very helpful for me. Other things I have done:

• use my strengths - I am really good at planning and organizing - I just needed to figure out how to apply that to me: I now document everything I eat, including quantities. I have to acknowledge what I am eating and be accountable. By writing it down, I have been able to consistently make better choices and/or smaller quantities.
  
• Much of what I used to eat was unconscious. I would think of food and would automatically reach for something (anything) to eat. I know that I didn't have a clue of how much I was actually eating. Now I make a conscious choice to eat everything. It doesn't stop me eating, but helps with Portion Control and choice. Before I eat it - I ask myself- am I really hungry? Will something lower calorie or fat work? Would something to drink work instead? Can I split it in half? Can I get someone to share with me?
  
• I try to preplan my eating and menus- including when going out. I still go out all the time, but I think ahead of time of what I can order that will satisfy me but be a semi sane choice. I have learned to really enjoy leftovers - if I have food ready to eat with minimal effort, I am less likely to reach for comforting "junk" food.
  
• I KNOW that I am an evening eater -this has been my dysfunctional pattern for 40 years. I could choose to deny myself and berate myself and tell myself that I can't eat after 7 pm and be miserable and angry and then I eat and then I get more miserable and angry and then I eat more (recognize the cycle?). Instead I choose to plan Snacks that will satisfy me and my cravings (everyone is different). I plan for at least 2 evening Snacks - sometimes I eat them, sometimes I don't. Favorite choices for me: sugar free pudding, sugar free Jello, turkey pepperoni sticks, chocolate vita muffins, 100 calorie popcorn packs. Please note that my snacks are not about carrot sticks - they are about satisfying me. The snacks are almost always 100 calories or less each.
  
• I still eat pizza, cake, Cookies and chocoloate. I DO try to plan for those items and then eat in moderation. If I really want something, I make sure I have the self talk of ensuring that I really want it and then I have it. No guilt, no beating myself up. I also try to choose something that is really high quality, rather than the cheap junk that I used to fill myself up on. Why have Mccains frozen chocolate cake which is really only edible oil products - choose a really good piece of chocolate cake (buy one piece rather than the whole cake).
  
• I don't go thru drive throughs anymore. I make sure I have ready to eat or prepare foods at home. After almost a year - I had been thinking about KFC for months - I gave in and went through the drive through. What did I learn? The thought of it was much better than the actual taste - It really wasn't worth it - I can fake fry (bake) chicken that tastes much better. I consider that a very successful experiment
  
• If you give in to a craving and it doesn't taste that great - STOP EATING!! For me that was an unheard of concept. I can now have a bite or two of something - if it doesn't live up to expectations - I throw it away.
  
• Make exercise a part of your daily life. Find something you can do and just do it. You can start to add challenges when you get comfortable with actually moving. Not only will you feel better and look better, you will also be filling in time where you won't be eating!
  

You know yourself better than anyone. You know you can do this. Sit down with pen and paper and develop a plan that works for you and your needs. Everyone has wonderful advice - pick and choose what will help you and leave the rest behind.

Good Luck!!!!!