As my date grows closer, I am leaning toward only telling a few close friends about my surgery. I suppose this is due to embarassment, that I could not lose weight the "normal" way, whatever that means. Also, I've had a lifetime of comments from family, and just do not want to go there.

Is anybody else hesitating to spill the beans to friends, coworkers, etc?

I have sopped the idea around with a few people but I haven't said anything in the last few months. I have confirmed my surgery with my dh, a good friend who has had wls, and the wonderful people on this forum.

Of course my DH knows and has been supportive. I've also told my family and a few friends and the people I work with. (I'm in a small office, nothings sacred lol) Other then that I am being selective rignt now of who I tell.

I have decided not to tell everyone. As of now, 2 friends know that I am having the surgery. I have tried so many diets and I always fail. This is such a personal decision I don't want to hear anything negative. I have about 65 lbs to lose and most people would say "just eat less and exercise more". Well, I do exercise and I do watch what I eat. If I didn't my weight would be triple of what it is today. There is a history of obesity in my family and I have witnessed all the problems that go hand-and-hand with being over weight. I do not want to live that life. I want to be healthy and live a long life.

I am SO greatful that I found this board and hearing about everyone's experience.

surgery date 9/5 (can't wait)

at first i tols no one wha ti was planning on doing ...and that was before i even went to a seminar.....after the seminar ....i told only 2 close friends...i was ashamed i think...i could not lose wait the normal way as you put it....it is now 7 months later and i would scream it from the rooftops....this is an exciting time for me.....my life is going to change...i am going to be healthy ..have energy and of course get back to my cute self......do what makes you feel good about your decesion but congrats- you are on you way to a wonderful healthy new you!

I have told tons of people! I sometimes have thought maybe I shouldn't have, but that is just me. I have had a lifetime of sharing information and the people it has helped me meet and help has been undeniable. You never know who you will help in your journey through life.

I have a disabled daughter who was born with a rare syndrome. After she was born a social worker gave me ideas of how to deal with people asking me questions about her (sometimes inappropriate ones) and not sharing any info so I could feel "normal". Well, guess what I tell everyone about her. She is a true blessing in my life and I am not ashamed of her at all. Her disability is part of who she is just like my weight is part of me. I am not embarrassed by either journeys. I may get frustrated with the difficulties I experience becasue of the challenges I face, but I am not ashamed to be having WLS. I am proud that I am brave enough to do what ever it takes to get healthy so I can live a long and happy life with all of my family.

I know I have already been helped tremendously by those of you on this site. I know we will be here for each other along the journey. For me, I feel like I should not limit that support and knowledge to this website alone. Sure there are people I would not tell, and there are people who are not supportive of my choice, but I am proud of what I am doing. If anyone thinks this is the "easy way" they are full of do-do!!! And they do not know what I have been through to get to this point. So, "pooh" on them and "yeah" for us!

Just my 2 cents!:biggrin: I get why some of you feel like keeping it private, I am not a very private person. Hence, look at what I teach for a living below! I am a Romance Specialist and help women improve the intimacy in their relationships. I guess most people would consider me a very open book.:thumbup:

My dad's side of the family knows NOTHING. They are the same ones that told me last year, "Your hair looks so good...you are so pretty...Just stop eating!"

They are the horrible, nightmarishly unsupportive family you hear stories about! Yup, their mine! :thumbup: My dad is supportive, but his WIFE, his MOTHER and his other DAUGHTER think I've gotten this way by Sin and Sloth and will never let me forget that.

I don't want to even imagine how they would deal with be getting the surgery....I am really, really, REALLY comfortable with just telling them I'm back on Weight Watchers again. It's not like the pay enough attention to know otherwise.

As for the rest of my friends and family, I'm being selective with who I tell because I tend to attract really negative energies or something and have a lot of friends with hang ups. My mother, boyfriend and few good friends already know and are being updated all the time on my approval status.

I hope anyone else with families like this feel better after reading this, learning there are other like you and your families - are you guys out there? Or am I the only one? LOL

Thanks for listening

I have told everyone that I speak to; my immediate family, friends, and co-workers. I work for a very large company and have seen co-workers go out for "gallbladder" surgery and come back and lose a ton of weight. Everyone knows what really happened. I don't want to be one of those people. I am proud that I made this decision and I don't want people thinking that I am not taking this seriously. Plus, I have figured out that a lot of people are misinformed about the Lap Band and I have been able to clear their misconceptions. Also, I am taking a whole month off of work so people are going to know it is more than just a vacation. When I come back to work I look forward to sticking to my plan and knowing that everyone knows what I did and hopefully I won't slip up!!!

As my date grows closer, I am leaning toward only telling a few close friends about my surgery. I suppose this is due to embarassment, that I could not lose weight the "normal" way, whatever that means. Also, I've had a lifetime of comments from family, and just do not want to go there.

Is anybody else hesitating to spill the Beans to friends, coworkers, etc?

I did not tell many people either. I just feel its none of there business to know. I had my done on may 5 and i have lost 43 pounds. Just let the people who love you know.........................

I have a fatty tumor I am going to have removed at the same time, so I am just telling people that I am having that removed and glossing over the fact that I will be having a lap band installed

I have a fatty tumor I am going to have removed at the same time, so I am just telling people that I am having that removed and glossing over the fact that I will be having a lap band installed

What's a fatty tumor and where is yours located? Do you know how much it weighs?

I also told anyone who would hear me. Hope it will keep me motivated. Plus, I was gone so much for appointments and stuff, I felt like I kinda had to explain myself....at least to my supervisors. Most have been very supportive and those who haven't or have been on the fence, I informed them about what I was doing and they kinda backed down. (When they figured out that, yes, I had done my research and am ready to do this!) Im pretty much an open book anyway....dont keep secrets well. Hopefully telling everyone wont come back to haunt me.

I know it's difficult to not care about what others think of us but honestly, people are generally too self absorbed to really give anyone else much more than a passing thought when you are in front of them or when they engage in mindless, idle gossip. At the end of the day, you are left with you and what you think of yourself is the only thing that really matters. So don't give others any more time or energy than they are giving you. Caring too much about what others think of us is probably one of the reasons why we are overweight.

I have told my family members, the ones that matter, co-workers and friends.

Sheila

My entire family knows, they are very supportive. I told a few people at work, but it was hard to keep it a secret. A few other people in the office have had some type of bariatric surgery. And we all know with rumors, if you associate yourself with someone who has had surgery, you are bound to be next... I really don't care who knows. It was the best decision I could have ever made:thumbup:

I have told everyone that will listen. Only one person has told me to just eat better and excersie more...I gave them a rasion of sh*t when that happened. Other wise everyone I tell has been super suportive. I can't wait for this experiance to start and I have never been more excited to share this with as many people I can. I look at it this way...if everyone around me knows that I have had the Lap-band then I will think more about what I am doing...I don't know why, but if I know everyone is watching me go through this, I know I will watch myself...