Dating and weight loss

[Rose perez 3]

Hi ladies has anyone found it that they could date or be treated better after weight loss surgery ? would like to know your stories

[catwoman7 10,874]

well, I don't date because I'm married. But even in my mid-60s, I get a lot more attention from men than I did when I was morbidly obese.

[ms.sss 14,699]

i def get more (positive) attention from men, which doesn't surprise me.

but what i didn't expect was the increased positive attention from women (note i am a woman too lol).

women are "friendlier" to me when im smaller vs bigger. female strangers will start small talk with me, ask me questions about my day or what im wearing, shoot me a smile or knowing look. offer unsolicited help or assistance.

which makes me sad sometimes for all the "girl power" connections girls in bigger bodies may miss out on, especially those who don't have solid female friend groups already.

lets be nice to people, people!

i realize that others' behaviour towards me is affected by my own behaviour so there's also that, so if i project confidence and approachability, it attracts.

let's love ourselves, people!

(yes i also realize i went off on a tangent there...sorry!)

Edited April 6 by ms.sss

[learn2cook 494]

As a woman in my 50’s it’s hard getting out there and making new friends never mind dating. That said, yes I’m dating and making friends. I made a promise to myself during COVID lockdowns that I would make and keep friends with intent and discernment. I date women and men and everyone in between, so yes there’s lots of dating but few people with kindness and calmness who are near my age, actually single, and don’t have mommy issues. I’m focusing more on friendships now. There’s lots of dates, but friends are gold!

[alphacat68 7]

Sigh...yeah. I never dated much due to insecurity and not getting much attention from the fellas. I've lost 110 pounds and joined Match to as a gift to myself to finally get out there and date...I've learned that my cat is truly my favorite companion. [emoji16]

Sent from my SM-N950U using BariatricPal mobile app

[BreF 2]

I am 13 years out from surgery, lost and kept 125lb off. I have noticed that I do get more attention but over the last 10 years there has been more acceptance on body type.

Currently I am 150lb with a lot of excess skin, Mainly the arms, stomach, and thighs. It's easy to hide in clothes but when it gets down to being naked it's a whole other look. What I think is important is confidence. When I was dating usually the comment I would get is how little I eat and that's a great segway for me to bring my story up. With that said, I have been with the same individual now for several months. What's different is that while I am fluffy and have skin that can be flying in the wind, my partner is a professional MMA fighter who hits the gym everyday and keeps his body in prime shape. We are both in our 40s. At first I was worried about my excess skin. That was very shallow of me to think and a hurdle I had to jump over. While on the inside I am very confident I know I am different looking than most physically (as not many are out there around me with such excess skin). I did have a couple of conversations with him about it and what it boils down to is who you are on the inside. I even brought up that I could have the excess skin removed and he commented on and asked why I would go through so much pain for an image when what matters is my personality. I think that's what partners should focus on. Physical is only temporary.

[Rose perez 3]

Omg your so inspiring, sending blessings and love, always💗

[Rose perez 3]

On 4/6/2024 at 11:30 AM, ms.sss said:

i def get more (positive) attention from men, which doesn't surprise me.

but what i didn't expect was the increased positive attention from women (note i am a woman too lol).

women are "friendlier" to me when im smaller vs bigger. female strangers will start small talk with me, ask me questions about my day or what im wearing, shoot me a smile or knowing look. offer unsolicited help or assistance.

which makes me sad sometimes for all the "girl power" connections girls in bigger bodies may miss out on, especially those who don't have solid female friend groups already.

let's be nice to people, people!

I realize that others' behavior towards me is affected by my own behavior so there's also that, so if i project confidence and approachability, it attracts.

let's love ourselves, people!

(yes, I also realize I went off on a tangent there...sorry!)

I agree, we need to love ourselves more