I am 6 weeks post surgery and I've been pretty open about it. Mainly because it's easier to explain my small meals and I don't have people trying to get me to eat. What drives me crazy are the people that when they find out you had surgery, give advice like "why didn't you just walk a little more?" I want to scream "gee why didn't I think of that!". Instead, I grit my teeth, smile and say, "it doesn't always work that way". Really, do people think that I would have major surgery and spend the next 6 weeks drinking liquids and trying to reintroduce myself to food if instead all I had to do was a walk a little more?

That's one reason I'm not telling anyone ! People also think this is a "shortcut", and I don't have the patience to explain it to them. I already decided if someone pushes me about what I eat ..I'm going to get really somber ... and say " I had to have stomach surgery and they ended up taking out half of my stomach". Hopefully it will sound so serious that they won't ask why. LOL

3 hours ago, Wolfgirl17 said:

I am 6 weeks post surgery and I've been pretty open about it. Mainly because it's easier to explain my small meals and I don't have people trying to get me to eat. What drives me crazy are the people that when they find out you had surgery, give advice like "why didn't you just walk a little more?" I want to scream "gee why didn't I think of that!". Instead, I grit my teeth, smile and say, "it doesn't always work that way". Really, do people think that I would have major surgery and spend the next 6 weeks drinking liquids and trying to reintroduce myself to food if instead all I had to do was a walk a little more?

EXACTLY.

I told my Husband and son. When I visited with my immediate family later that year I told them then. I did not want any scare stories or negativity.

This journey sort of requires you have to stop caring what other people think or you and your choices. We've all got a path to walk; some of us are good at staying on theirs and others feel like they've got to get in the middle of yours and pretend every choice they've made is perfect. Giving advice like, oh you just need to walk more, is condescending.

I feel you OP. People who aren't obese cannot know what those of us who have been have gone through. Honestly some of them DO think exactly what you have described but it's on them that they haven't done some research about obesity and causes and cures before shooting their mouths off.

It's kind of equivalent to saying to a cancer sufferer - gosh, didn't you ever think of giving up smoking? Totally redundant commentary on your life. Why would you say that?

Agree - you should deffo just brush/laugh it off. Hopefully they will catch up eventually.

I've told fewer people than I can count on one hand. I'm having my surgery at the end of August which, due to what I do for a living, will be close to the end of the time of year where I will regularly see the majority of my business colleagues and peers. We won't generally see each other often again until the spring (about 7 months) by which time I expect I'll have lost a significant amount of weight that I'll simply explain away by shrugging and saying I lived at the gym through the winter.

I only told a handful of people to avoid unnecessary comments. My mom still doesn't know and she lives with me ?‍♀️

I feel like every journey is so personal that the last thing you want is others commenting when they have not walked in your shoes. Unfortunately, in my culture people think everything is done out of vanity, and that was not my reason and therefore I did not want to be associated with it.