Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Never had this much anxiety, now the plague.



Recommended Posts

I am post op. I don't know how my diet will fare.

My small business is gone. I used to run a cleaning service. Clients cancelled frequently before the lock down, now, illegal to run a business. After the lockdown ends, nothing will be normal ever again. I'm doubtful business can ever run again because no one working, and anyone with any money will be prepping, saving and cleaning their own homes for their own protection, and my employees are gone too as well. They can't wait around. With the prospect of government welfare for all wage earners, I will never find employees. I couldn't even 2 weeks ago. I have business bills due, and taxes for this quarter that I can not pay due April 30th.

I'm almost 50 now, and putting job applications into grocery stores, because they are the only thing open.

I can't sleep, can't eat, barely drink, and I physically ache all over. I'm not suicidal yet, I don't know if I ever will be, but, I honestly don't care about that either. As long as my pet dog is alive, I will not abandon him.

I'm not very religious. I thought maybe it's time to find a spark, but even the churches are closed. The plague (as I call it) even forces me to question the presence of people in public (elderly) and even people walking together. I am going to go nuts. I thought I could handle this.

I think I need to fix my game controller and just sink my life into Xbox games..... But that is exactly how I got overweight (one reason), but it gets my mind off of everything.

Sent from my ONEPLUS A6013 using BariatricPal mobile app

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My heart goes out to you. I wish I knew what to say in times like this. You are not alone. So many people are having a terrible time of it. I hope this all does turn around eventually. After the recession in 2008 It took a couple of years but life slowly returned to normal. I’m sending positive vibes your way. I pray you find some comfort and strength in this very difficult time.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My heart is breaking for you. I don't know if it is any consolation, but you are most definitely not alone. All of us are feeling more scared and anxious than ever before.

You have already fought a huge battle! You have lost so much weight, and come so far. One of the things that this journey has probably taught you is moderation. If gaming is mentally a break for you right now, give yourself that break, but make sure you limit it to what is actually helpful, not harmful. Say you decide on 3 hours per day, stick to that. Gaming will also let you have social contact with other humans without physical contact.

I have been stuck in my house due to pre-surgery flu, then post surgery, then I had a nasty cold that coincided with the uptick in concerns about CoVid 19. I set an alarm at 10 of every hour, and walked around my house just to keep myself moving! I NEVER felt like doing it, but made myself get at least 250 steps, and most times I would keep going for 5 or 10 minutes. I know it isn't hiking Everest, but it is what I could do.

Your financial worries have to be so discouraging. The only little light at the end of that tunnel is that the whole country is facing this! They are going to have to give relief, and you will be positioned to take advantage of that. It is going to be a whole new world once we come out the other side; my guess is that lots of places are going to get a lot more serious about cleaning and sanitizing workplaces, so maybe your chosen profession will have a whole new lease on life! If not, my fervent hope is that once this ends the country gets serious about pivoting toward green or environmentally friendly industries, and we will have a "new deal" type financial bail out that is for ALL of us, not just big banks and airlines. Hang in there, I am 90% sure there will be eviction and/or foreclosure moratoriums. You need to focus on maintaining shelter, food, utilities. Everything else right now will have to wait. I know that you have probably spent a lifetime building your business, your credit, etc., but right now we all have to go to survival mode.

I hope you find a way to connect with folks, maybe through an online group that shares some interests. The evidence is strong that even a short walk each day in nature helps restore our mental health. I am a person with little or no "hobbies" except for reading, travel and listening to live music. I can't sit and read all darn day! So I have decided to try some container gardening...I'll have either have wasted some time and a little money, Or I will have nice fresh veggies and berries this spring and summer! I am also starting an indoor herb garden. You will find your own interests. Learn a foreign language? Take up knitting? Foster a dog or cat in need? Volunteer to deliver supplies to elders or disabled neighbors (also a job opportunity for that.) You are a good writer, any interest in journaling? You have been through quite a bit, journaling may be a way to process that.

Good luck to you, reach out, try to take heart, when the dark thoughts come look for the light. This community is very supportive, use it!

All the best

Lisa

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

4 hours ago, wjgo said:

I am post op. I don't know how my diet will fare.

My small business is gone. I used to run a cleaning service. Clients cancelled frequently before the lock down, now, illegal to run a business. After the lockdown ends, nothing will be normal ever again. I'm doubtful business can ever run again because no one working, and anyone with any money will be prepping, saving and cleaning their own homes for their own protection, and my employees are gone too as well. They can't wait around. With the prospect of government welfare for all wage earners, I will never find employees. I couldn't even 2 weeks ago. I have business bills due, and taxes for this quarter that I can not pay due April 30th.

I'm almost 50 now, and putting job applications into grocery stores, because they are the only thing open.

I can't sleep, can't eat, barely drink, and I physically ache all over. I'm not suicidal yet, I don't know if I ever will be, but, I honestly don't care about that either. As long as my pet dog is alive, I will not abandon him.

I'm not very religious. I thought maybe it's time to find a spark, but even the churches are closed. The plague (as I call it) even forces me to question the presence of people in public (elderly) and even people walking together. I am going to go nuts. I thought I could handle this.

I think I need to fix my game controller and just sink my life into Xbox games..... But that is exactly how I got overweight (one reason), but it gets my mind off of everything.

Sent from my ONEPLUS A6013 using BariatricPal mobile app

Gosh! Such burden! ((hugs)) I can't waive a magic wand and keep you from feeling the things you are feeling, but if I could, I would. You are a strong productive person and you've done things you never thought you could do before and have succeeded SO WELL! You've been an inspiration to many here! I BELIEVE. Choose to believe. Even if you don't feel it in your heart. Choose to believe that this WILL end and that we will all rebuild!

Escape if that helps you for now. But also plan or schedule time to do things that are constructive. For instance, I love the idea of being a "super cleaner." Maybe research what it takes to be a plague cleaner?! I know my niece has passed a cold around her house and asked the other day if there were any cleaners who would come in and deep clean...like DEEP clean. Clean toys. Sanitize. Etc. So research it! Charge a premium for it cuz you will become a front liner. You would be able to hire people. People are desperate for work. And you would be able to pay well. It would be pre-pay or pay on completion so no waiting for invoices to be paid.

Also, there will be tax extensions, and tax forgiveness. This is being planned. There will be bailouts. I just believe that this is the beginning of a forced change for us all. And you WILL get to revise and conquer. Remember to deep breath. And start thinking creatively how to repackage your business to adjust to this changing need. People will still need to have cleaning!!! Businesses too.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@wjgo, how are you doing? A friend of mine said to me yesterday "we are one day closer to this being over". That is my mantra for today!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Recent Topics

  • Most popular:

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Seige  »  Pj23

      I was in A-Fib several times the week after my surgery. I had been on a beta blocker prior to surgery, but went off it, substituting another BP med, so I could take the stress test. I thought I was dying. Went back on the beta blocker, and the new drug as well. Pulse went back to my normal, under 50. But my BP is still high. Surgery was 3/8. Have a cardiologist appointment 4/8. My surgeon has been of no use. He just says it will go down, when you  lose your  weight.  He didn’t even examine my incisions. Did his job, not interested now.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • It's time.  »  healthyamy20

      We are right there with you.  A lot of time and work waiting for this and  boom.... but no end in sight and the uncertainty is sooo hard.  But,  I do remind myself that people are dying and being in a hospital isn't a safe place to be and I rather be fat and alive than thin and dead. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • MsMocie

      I wish there was any obvious, easy soloution to the whole bony butt situation!
      · 3 replies
      1. Machalo

        So I was in the WalMart the other day waiting in line for my prescription refills and on the shelves are the different braces and canes and aids of all kinds. One of them was a "Coxys Cushion"! I was floored. Since when did they start making those? While I still have a ton and a half of weight to lose before I'll need one of those, I was happy to see it since I've read the threads about bony butt syndrome on here. ((HUGS))

      2. MsMocie

        I have one of those donuts, very uncomfortable :P I ordered a pair of padde thights to see if it helps with it. My body is like, I like to loose fat on the ass and the tighs first. So I have this butt with all bone, and that squiiishy stomach with all the rest of the fat on it😂 and I never had an issue with my ass, I actually quite liked it beeing a little junky in the trunky!

      3. biginjapan

        This is not something I have to worry about - as a pear-shaped gal I have a lot of padding! That said, with age and now weight loss it's not as..firm as it once was and I am afraid of how much will be left back there once all is said and done!

    • AshMarie794

      STAY SAFE EVERYONE!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Angelove22

      4 more days!
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Trending Topics

  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs
    ×