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So, I've been pretty vocal at work about me having wls. Mainly because people have been asking questions about me losing weight or avoiding certain foods. I don't see a reason to lie our withhold the truth. I'm not ashamed or embarrassed about it. I'm excited!

Anyways, this lady at work keeps commenting on the way I eat now & what I eat. I had skinny popcorn ther other day & she's like "Should you really be eating that?"

Then today she asked me how I could eat my lunch so quickly & that much food shouldn't be consumed so fast. I don't think I ate unreasonably fast & why are you paying attention to how fast I eat anyways???

All I know is if this lady doesn't get off my back, I'm going to snap. She's the only person I've had trouble with so far. If you were me, what would you do or say to this lady?

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I would say.... Are you considering weight loss surgery, too? I can hook you up with my surgeon:)

It's possible that she, herself, has had bypass in the past and she had a different experience than you're having. I know other sleevers who are horrified I ate 1000 calories a day at 3 weeks...even though I'm following my doctor's orders precisely. Because my doctor's orders conflicts with theirs....i'm wrong and there's no winning. LOL:)

I think you should investigate why she's so interested.

I'd ask her if she's had bypass herself.

When she says...Should you be eating that? Ask...her if she's a secret bariatric surgeon or bariatric nutritionist? Because surely her expertise must be coming from some hidden formal education.

She'll undoubtedly counter.....Well, I'm just concerned that you're going to hurt yourself and blah blah blah...

To which you should respond.....Thank you for your concern, but what, exactly, gives you the right to address my medical issues? I don't recall soliciting your input.

She'll blather on about trying to help.

Say....I don't experience your comments that way. I experience them as criticism and harassment. Kindly stop.

And then change the subject and try to end on a positive note. Ending on a more positive note is important. You do have to work with her...and she might just be too dumb to realize she has no business commenting. For all you know, she lives with someone who nitpicks everything she eats. Try to give her that benefit of the doubt and let it go.

Should do the trick.

Edited by Creekimp13

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I'm sorry this is happening to you. You don't deserve it. The next time she makes a comment, get uncomfortably close to her, look her right in the eyes & quietly tell her, "With all due respect, you aren't helping." Good luck!

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It's a work environment so make sure you have a measured response. If she continues to make comments that make you feel uncomfortable then simply tell her that you appreciate the concern but you're handling things fine on your own. If she pushes further then flat out tell her that you would like her to stop commenting on the subject. If it goes any further then take it to HR. That way you've done your part and you can go to HR with a legitimate complaint. Also never hurts to have a witness around if she's making these comments in front of others.

I would want to snap as well but when these things happen it's often you who end up being the one sitting across from HR. Speaking from years of experience being a supervisor. It's one thing to be vocal about having WLS and having to expect some people to voice their opinion, which IMO is fine even if they don't agree with it. It's the people that continue to go on and on and on and on about it that become the problem and don't know when to stop.

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I completely understand .....I've had a lady at work go on and on for months it's funny she never said anything about it prior to me having the surgery but afterwards all I heard was "you can die" " you can die" " you can die" well, I'm not dead, I'm very healthy now and I'm doing great. I stay away and avoid her at all cost....

Sent from my LGL84VL using BariatricPal mobile app

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I would just say, thank you for your concern, but I got this....and smile....


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The reality is that we as humans want to try and drag everyone onto our level, it is the tall poppy syndrome, if you rise up for any reason people will try to cut you down. We do it to sports heroes, we do it to celebrities we do it to our friends who work for or are presented with promotions, even if it is only in jest (every joke has a seed of truth to it).

I would just continue to rise above her attitude towards you, use it as another form of fuel for this journey, show her that you can and you will better yourself.

When it boils down to it im sure it comes down to she is insecure and needs to project that towards someone else, unfortunately that person right now is you. Along this journey you will find haters and they may come from the most unexpected places but just rise above, be better than they are and show the world what you can truly be.

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