I'm not telling my family that I am having surgery, is anyone else here doing the same ?

Only told the hubby. No one else

On 12/10/2017 at 2:09 AM, Starsmore said:

(but my parents and my sister are my close support system, along with a very understanding boss and former boss).

Nice to have a range of people like these in your sphere!

I told only one person and, still, only that one person knows. And honestly, I wouldn’t have told that person if I hadn’t needed the help post surgery. There were a few reasons I chose not to. 1. I didn’t want the “but why don’t you just diet” comments. 2. I didn’t want the “it’s the easy way out” comments and 3. Honestly, I was afraid of failure and, in case I failed, I didn’t want anyone to know. Luckily, I have been successful but I still don’t tell anyone. I just don’t want to hear it.

Actually, I did tell my gynecologist. Before she knew, she was so happy and congratulating me on my weight loss. Then, when she examined me, she saw the scars on my tummy and asked what I had done. When I told her I had WLS she said, “oh. I thought you actually worked for it and did it on your own.” Ugh!!! And THAT is why I don’t tell people. I HAVE worked for it!

But other people are more open and tell everyone and that’s okay too. I would just be careful and really consider ahead of time how you might feel when people make these snide comments. Some people don’t care. But others can be hurt and derailed by them.


As of October 12, 2017, I am 4 months post op and have lost 100 pounds. I have reached my goal weight and could not be more ecstatic!

I choose not to tell my family for the same reasons 1, 2, and 3. I got sleeved on sept 12 and lost 20 pounds before surgery and after 25 more a total of 45 and still loosing. I’m happy with my decision of wls...

I think people who have not battle obesity just don't understand.

I think people who have not battle obesity just don't understand.

Sadly I've seen people who have had their own obesity struggles be just as judgemental... Especially the ones who managed to lose weight without WLS.

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I choose not to tell my family for the same reasons 1, 2, and 3. I got sleeved on sept 12 and lost 20 pounds before surgery and after 25 more a total of 45 and still loosing. I’m happy with my decision of wls...

Congratulations on your hard work! You are doing great. Keep it up!


As of October 12, 2017, I am 4 months post op and have lost 100 pounds. I have reached my goal weight and could not be more ecstatic!

I told only one person and, still, only that one person knows. And honestly, I wouldn’t have told that person if I hadn’t needed the help post surgery. There were a few reasons I chose not to. 1. I didn’t want the “but why don’t you just diet” comments. 2. I didn’t want the “it’s the easy way out” comments and 3. Honestly, I was afraid of failure and, in case I failed, I didn’t want anyone to know. Luckily, I have been successful but I still don’t tell anyone. I just don’t want to hear it.

Actually, I did tell my gynecologist. Before she knew, she was so happy and congratulating me on my weight loss. Then, when she examined me, she saw the scars on my tummy and asked what I had done. When I told her I had WLS she said, “oh. I thought you actually worked for it and did it on your own.” Ugh!!! And THAT is why I don’t tell people. I HAVE worked for it!

But other people are more open and tell everyone and that’s okay too. I would just be careful and really consider ahead of time how you might feel when people make these snide comments. Some people don’t care. But others can be hurt and derailed by them.


As of October 12, 2017, I am 4 months post op and have lost 100 pounds. I have reached my goal weight and could not be more ecstatic!

This is exactly me except I'm a male and don't need a gyno. I woulda told nobody but they make u tell your support person. I just don't think it's anybody's business. I've always been known as a Gym guy I just let **** get out of hand the past 5 years cause of some shitty breakups and relationships I had. I'm on day 10 post op down 12 lbs already and 44 lbs total. It's all about you now so tell whoever will make u feel comfortable.

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On 10/13/2017 at 6:11 AM, Finnix said:

I told only one person and, still, only that one person knows. And honestly, I wouldn’t have told that person if I hadn’t needed the help post surgery. There were a few reasons I chose not to. 1. I didn’t want the “but why don’t you just diet” comments. 2. I didn’t want the “it’s the easy way out” comments and 3. Honestly, I was afraid of failure and, in case I failed, I didn’t want anyone to know. Luckily, I have been successful but I still don’t tell anyone. I just don’t want to hear it.

Actually, I did tell my gynecologist. Before she knew, she was so happy and congratulating me on my weight loss. Then, when she examined me, she saw the scars on my tummy and asked what I had done. When I told her I had WLS she said, “oh. I thought you actually worked for it and did it on your own.” Ugh!!! And THAT is why I don’t tell people. I HAVE worked for it!

But other people are more open and tell everyone and that’s okay too. I would just be careful and really consider ahead of time how you might feel when people make these snide comments. Some people don’t care. But others can be hurt and derailed by them.


As of October 12, 2017, I am 4 months post op and have lost 100 pounds. I have reached my goal weight and could not be more ecstatic!

First....OMG on the the Gyno...a DR no less. Shows how absolutely uninformed the medical community can be let alone the average person. I've said it before and I'll say it again and my surgery is not till Nov 8th.....this is and will continue to be one of the hardest things I have done for myself to lose weight. And I've done it all. At least this one will work and not stop working and bring friends! CONGRATS...I'd say MASSIVE congrats on your success! my goodness....4 months post op and at your goal weight? oh my gosh. I figured I wouldn't reach my goal weight for a year minimum! Good for you!

This is exactly me except I'm a male and don't need a gyno. I woulda told nobody but they make u tell your support person. I just don't think it's anybody's business. I've always been known as a Gym guy I just let **** get out of hand the past 5 years cause of some shitty breakups and relationships I had. I'm on day 10 post op down 12 lbs already and 44 lbs total. It's all about you now so tell whoever will make u feel comfortable.

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Wow that’s great progress. Good for you!


As of October 12, 2017, I am 4 months post op and have lost 100 pounds. I have reached my goal weight and could not be more ecstatic!

First....OMG on the the Gyno...a DR no less. Shows how absolutely uninformed the medical community can be let alone the average person. I've said it before and I'll say it again and my surgery is not till Nov 8th.....this is and will continue to be one of the hardest things I have done for myself to lose weight. And I've done it all. At least this one will work and not stop working and bring friends! CONGRATS...I'd say MASSIVE congrats on your success! my goodness....4 months post op and at your goal weight? oh my gosh. I figured I wouldn't reach my goal weight for a year minimum! Good for you!

Thank you so much. It has been a crazy journey, for sure. I have followed the surgeons orders to a T and have worked my butt off in the gym 6 days a week. I alternate days between cardio and weight lifting. Weight lifting has been very good for keeping the loose skin at bay. It really has changed my shape a lot which wouldn’t have happened with weight loss alone.

So, if you hear people talking about “well Dr. V says no exercise for 6 months”, please do your own research. There is no science to back up those claims. I think people go along with it because they want to believe it. I mean, who wouldn’t want to be told not to exercise, ya know? I have been in the gym since day 14 post op and I feel amazing. And honestly I think I look amazing too. Lol

Good luck!


As of October 12, 2017, I am 4 months post op and have lost 100 pounds. I have reached my goal weight and could not be more ecstatic!

Thank you so much. It has been a crazy journey, for sure. I have followed the surgeons orders to a T and have worked my butt off in the gym 6 days a week. I alternate days between cardio and weight lifting. Weight lifting has been very good for keeping the loose skin at bay. It really has changed my shape a lot which wouldn’t have happened with weight loss alone.

So, if you hear people talking about “well Dr. V says no exercise for 6 months”, please do your own research. There is no science to back up those claims. I think people go along with it because they want to believe it. I mean, who wouldn’t want to be told not to exercise, ya know? I have been in the gym since day 14 post op and I feel amazing. And honestly I think I look amazing too. Lol

Good luck!


As of October 12, 2017, I am 4 months post op and have lost 100 pounds. I have reached my goal weight and could not be more ecstatic!

Congrats. There's hope for me then. I am just about 7 weeks post op and only halfway to my goal weight.

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Congrats. There's hope for me then. I am just about 7 weeks post op and only halfway to my goal weight.

Sent from my SM-G935T using BariatricPal mobile app

Of course there’s hope for you! You’re off to a great start! Stalls will happen and they’ll drive you crazy and make you doubt yourself, but trust the process and keep moving forward. You’ll do amazing.


As of October 12, 2017, I am 4 months post op and have lost 100 pounds. I have reached my goal weight and could not be more ecstatic!

6 hours ago, CrissCriss said:

I think people who have not battle obesity just don't understand.

There's a continual assumption, STRANGELY ENOUGH, held by other 'normal-sized', overweight and obese relatives, casual friends and work colleagues that the super-obese and morbidly obese have NEVER tried diet or exercise or both in a variety of ways.

What 5h1t5 me most of all is people more than 2/3 of the way to my mass/weight giving me free advice. Free advice from most of these people is just a routine of humans playing amateur god.

They just do not know that for 18 of the last 23 years that one has taken the obesity seriously and done something about it. And things have rings of optimism until work demands or family demands shake the routine or diet.

6 hours ago, BuffaloBill said:

get out of hand the past 5 years cause of some shitty breakups and relationships I had. I'm on day 10 post op down 12 lbs already and 44 lbs total. It's all about you now so tell whoever will make u feel comfortable.

Exactly.

I was very selective about the several I told about my gastric sleeve. It was my choice after 20+ serious diets and several badly-timed diets over a 25+ year period.

This sleeve surgery is me "investing" in me with my insurance money, my medical gap money, my time, etc. to get ahead of all the failed diets.

I should not have to keep justifying my choice in this to people who contend I should have had another shot or two at so-called 'natural' weight-loss.

My brother-in-law, for instance, is generally a lovely helpful man, a very well self-educated single tradesman in the building industry. He is, at any time, 10% to 15% over his ideal weight but judges himself as normal compared to his sister (my wife) and me.

He is blindly certain that it's simply more calories burnt than calories eaten. And I believe that that is true ... UP TO A CRITICAL TIPPING POINT for many people. But once one is morbidly obese for whatever single reason or combination of reasons, it's just like the Allies fighting WW2 on nine fronts in two theatres of the globe. It becomes all consuming, tiring and it becomes only possible to win if a maximum investment is made.

My brother-in-law is the ultimate armchair critic. He has ALL the answers ... in his opinion.

On my weight loss (and my wife's) I just don't want to hear him any more.

My wife has tried the gastric balloon method ... the first one for eight months and the new one has been in about eight weeks. She's dropped from almost 130kg to about 82kg. Her general target is to be "in the 60s" by xmas-time.

I have taken the more drastic step of gastric sleeve. My goal is precisely 100kg below my starting weight. So, in time, I want to be as close as possible to THREE-SEVENTHS of what I was in July. [174.6kg to 74.6kg ... BMI 56.4 to BMI 24.1].

I don't want to **ck this up so I am backing my $$ expenditure with careful commitment to my success. This is 72 hours post-op for me ... sleeved 12th Oct at 8:30am.

Edited October 14, 20178 yr by Rainbow_Warrior

2 hours ago, Finnix said:

Thank you so much. It has been a crazy journey, for sure. I have followed the surgeons orders to a T and have worked my butt off in the gym 6 days a week. I alternate days between cardio and weight lifting. Weight lifting has been very good for keeping the loose skin at bay. It really has changed my shape a lot which wouldn’t have happened with weight loss alone.

So, if you hear people talking about “well Dr. V says no exercise for 6 months”, please do your own research. There is no science to back up those claims. I think people go along with it because they want to believe it. I mean, who wouldn’t want to be told not to exercise, ya know? I have been in the gym since day 14 post op and I feel amazing. And honestly I think I look amazing too. Lol

Good luck!


As of October 12, 2017, I am 4 months post op and have lost 100 pounds. I have reached my goal weight and could not be more ecstatic!

That is fantastic! My Dr. said no exercise other than walking for 6 weeks. And then exercising is a must! My thing is my knees hurt so bad right now and I'm hoping that will get better with the weight loss so that I can exercise more. I've always been very athletic until a car accident a few years ago, and then bad knees from osteoarthritis. Praying I can get back to it soon! I am 5 weeks post op now and have lost 31 pounds total, counting the 14 pounds pre surgery.