Hope I'm doing the right thing

[splrttn 0]

<p>I'm 58 and I've been overweight most of my adult life. I weigh 268 and am 5'6".:help: I had this scheduled before,but I have no support. Everyone thinks I'm crazy and they say I'll probably get an infection or something. I had one staff infec with knee replacement surgery, so I guess I see their concern. My knees and hips are really bad with arthritis.I've had 2 knees and a hip. I'm scheduled for Oct. 28, 07. People have me so scared I'm about to back out again. Can anyone give me an encouraging word. Thanks so much<img src="http://www.LapBandTalk.com/images/smilies/help.gif" border="0" alt="" title="Help" smilieid="256" class="inlineimg" /></p>

[MizPeppy 3]

I'm sorry you have no support, it is important. This board is great for support and bariatric centers usually have monthly support groups. I am 48 with hypertension, diabetes and angina and I think this will be the best thing I've ever done for myself. I have lost 28 lbs so far and my ankle no longer hurts. I hope it works out for you. You have to do what you think is best for you. Beth

[MollyBrown 0]

I am also sorry that you do not have support. I too have struggled with my weight my whole life. Except for a brief period as a teen, and about four years in my late twenties, I have always been at least 50 lbs overweight and now I am 120 lbs overweight.

My mom died at 50 from coronary heart disease, and she had no quality at life at 50 because of her weight and her associated issues (hypertension, diabetes, joint pain, etc...). My dad had triple by-pass in 1999 and he has to take a ton of pills. At 63 he is a mess, everyday he experiences extreme joint pain, although he has controlled his weight now he still has tons of the lasting effects from being overweight for so long, his weight and poor eating habits went to far, damaging his joints and ensuring he will have to take at least 12 various pills a day for the rest of his life.

I am 44, I have occasional chest pain, I am diabetic, just started taking cholesterol medicine, and my knees, feet, and back are killing me. I have tried tons of diets, and am capable of success with the exception of feeling hungry all the time, so then I fall of the wagon. I view this choice as one of my final hopes in helping me slow the destiny of my genetics. I want my fifties to be my new thirties as they are saying in various magazines. I want to feel attractive, play tennis, go for nice long walks with my husband and dog, I want to travel without worrying if I will fit into a seat or break a chair (this summer in France I sat in a chair at a restaurant and the chair broke and I fell. It was the MOST EMBARRASSING thing that has ever happened to me).

I cannot tell you that this is the right thing for you, but I know in my heart of hearts it is the right thing for me. If you have struggled with your weight your whole life, are experiencing intense pain and discomfort at your early age, want for a better quality of life, have truly tried to lose weight with other methods, have researched this surgery so that you are super educated in what you are signing up for, and are 100% committed to using it as directed, then I think you will know what is right for you.

I will send a prayer up for you tonight, that somehow you find peace in whatever your decision is, and if you decide to do this, that you experience no infections. I will also pray that somehow you can sit down with those that are close to you and let them know that their lack of support is greatly hurting you, and that you really need them to be there for you as you would be there for them if they were faced with a similar decision, because that is what you do for those we care about and love.

Sorry if I rambled to much, I just really feel badly for you and hope things will get better.

Sincerely,

Molly

[Longhorn 1]

I suspect that your family and friends don't understand the operation. I found an ABC news story about Khaliah Ali's book about her weight loss due to lap-band surgery. The article includes an excerpt from her book in which she does an excellent job of explaining the surgery and benefits. I suggest you send out this link and/or print off some copies of the article to hand to your friends and loved ones to help them understand what you're doing. It might help you to read it, too. It helped me.

ABC News: Excerpt: Khaliah Ali's 'Fighting Weight'

Some people are uninformed, some are envious, and some are just mean or negative. And frankly, there are some people that would rather we remain fat for a variety of reasons. They may not even realize why they feel the way they do. It doesn't mean they don't love you or care about you but they're not necessarily showing it in the way that's best for you.

If they take the time to read this and other articles and still have concerns, you can politely ask then to respect the fact that you have researched this, you know the risks, you are under the care of a doctor, and you would appreciate it if they would respect your decision, even if they can't support it.

This is one reason why I'm not telling many people -- not because I can't handle it if they don't support me but because I'm not in the mood to educate others right now. Maybe later.

Good luck! You're doing the right thing to come here for support.

[margyb 0]

I had my Lap Band surgery October 9th. I am 65, height 5'6" and weighed 250 lbs. It was now or never! First few days were uncomfortable - glad I arranged for help to get through this first couple of weeks. Not as painful as I feared!

[CandySmooch 0]

I am so sorry you don't have any support. Please don't listen to anyone else, they are only trying to bring you down for doing what is best for you. This is the reason I chose not to tell anyone except my husband & mother about my surgery. There's too much pressure and lack of support from others. My step-dad knows because my mom told him and he's always eyeing me up and down looking to see if the surgery is working and I feel horrible added pressure since I've been a very slow loser. You do what you need to do and you can find support in the right places. Best of luck!

[make33 2]

I was just banded last Tuesday, and I was so scared in the last days that I thought I wanted to jump out of my skin: doubting the decision it had taken me seven months to come to!

We both know what we face without this tool, an early death but not before we develop diabetes, hypertension, kidney failure, arthritis. So you do have a choice...

I had decided to tell EVERYONE about my surgery, but I was shocked by some of the reactions--my whole office opposed my decision right up until the last week, when they were telling me it wasn't too late to change my mind. I even had people not respond at all, which is definite disapproval.

This one's for you, kiddo, so really think about what YOU want for yourself and your future!