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What to tell people?



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I'm being sleeved on 19th April - I've told mum, my sister, Hubble and 1 friend. It is something really private that I don't feel comfortable telling people but I don't want to glibly say 'eating less and exercising' and perpetuating myth that will result in weight loss. Any suggestions for something vague but not dishonest to tell people?

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I'm waiting on a surgery date, but I think I will have to tell people who ask that I did it to get healthier, and in my case, to save my kidneys because of my diabetes. I'm just praying that once the surgery is done, my diabetes will go into remission. I'm at the point now where food just isn't appealing to me much anymore, but I still can't lose weight, even cutting carbs. I can totally give up sugar, never been a huge candy/cookie/cake eater. I have no problem telling anyone about the surgery because it's my business, they haven't lived my life, nor have they struggled with serious health issues due to being obese. If they have some snarky comment about it, that's their problem, not mine. Just my take on things.

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Hi Rudge,

I'm worried about this too. I'm getting sleeved April 14th and have told close family and friends, but worry about how to react when people that I don't want to tell ask. Maybe focus on the decision to do it rather than the actual method? That you got to a stage that you just were ready to do something about it. Something clicked and you knew you needed to change things. I hope most people won't be so brazen to push for more.

We discussed it here a few days ago too:

Good luck with everything!

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1 hour ago, rudge said:

I'm being sleeved on 19th April - I've told mum, my sister, Hubble and 1 friend. It is something really private that I don't feel comfortable telling people but I don't want to glibly say 'eating less and exercising' and perpetuating myth that will result in weight loss. Any suggestions for something vague but not dishonest to tell people?

I'm telling people I'm having surgery that will help with certain health conditions and that a side effect is weight loss. No one has really asked me what type of procedure.

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I literally have told everyone. I'm not ashamed of taking control of my life and maybe it'll help someone because they may want it and can ask me questions. I didn't wanna have to keep up with lies, either and it's pretty obvious in most cases anyway, especially since I'm in the medical field. Each their own, though!


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If your worried tell who you don't want to no your having your gall stones out same opp 😀

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Been starting to get questions. My keyfood is right down the block from me and most of the people that work there i have grown up knowing. I've always been big so now being the smallest I've ever been, im starting to get questions from the people that work there lol. I've been going with the healthy diet thing. It's so weird and keeps throwing me off when someone asks because i don't really notice much of a difference. I still feel like I'm over 260lbs so it still surprises me when even wearing a thick winter coat people notice. Im going to have to get used to it because spring and summer are coming and im still 50lbs from goal. This is going to be rough, I'm not big on a lot of attention.



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I have told immediate family due to the way our weight loss programme works but I won't tell my parents in law as they will judge and try and get it stopped. We don't have a great relationship anymore and I know I will get all sorts of comments and being called a burden to my very supportive hubby is just a nono



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Lesson learned!
I told a lot of people thinking they would be happy for me because of my health. BUT instead I got a lot of negative response. I heard jealousy and envy from some people.
BUT that's ok because this is my life and I know what is best for me. These people have health issues themselves.
I can't worry about what people think.



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"I can't worry about what people think." - arringtonc49 got that exactly right.

I'm an open book. I'll tell anybody. I have a very supporting wife and family and have only ever gotten one negative reaction.

IMO, agonizing whether to tell someone is usually much worse than actually just telling someone.

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Thanks everyone appreciate your feedback. Worrying what other people think has always been a huge thing for me - on an intellectual level I know that it is stupid but at a gut evel it is primal if that makes sense! Something that I'm trying to do is just be more private about myself and stop this insatiable need to justify myself to everyone. Perhaps once I've practised that I may be able to move on and just tell people he truth without worrying about their reactions. Thanks again

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I've told some of my family (mom, dad, brother, cousin), but don't plan on telling anyone else. At work I'll just say I'm having a laparoscopic procedure and that I can't eat certain things afterwards. If people ask about the weight loss I'll just say it's from the surgery food restrictions.

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I had started a similar thread last month when I was a few weeks out from my VSG. I had already told my family, 3 best friends and key co-worker. I spent a great deal of mental energy on wondering what I'd say when people inquired after my surgery. This is totally out of character for me. Well, I'm 16 days out and even though I thought I'd be wearing a "Scarlet VSG" on my chest, only one person has even noticed any changes.I did lose 20# in two weeks. This gal said, "What's different about you, you look well rested [emoji23]". I agreed but didn't tell her that I am well rested because all the months of prep and anticipation are behind me! I've decided if someone asks I'll just tell them and move on.


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I have to say that obviously it's not THAT easy, but you do NOT have to explain yourself. You can simply say I decided to make a healthier lifestyle choice but even then, it's no ones business! THIS IS FOR YOU AND YOUR UNIQUE REASONS.

At least that's what my doctor said. IRL I'm yellow people it's due to my PCOS/infertility issues. Usually shuts people the capital F up.


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