Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

How do you handle people asking questions



Recommended Posts

Yes!!!! I don't have an issue telling people what I'm doing to lose weight because I'm eating less and moving WAAAAY more. I have an issue with questions like "you did t like your food?" Or "you didn't eat very much." I have anxiety about eating around new people.....and I'm attempting to date so anxiety is an issue!

Banded 2010 weight:327

Sleeved 12/28/16 weight:253

CW: 230 GW: 155

Heather in Texas

Can you tell me what CW and GW mean?

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Banded 2010 weight:327

Sleeved 12/28/16 weight:253

CW: 230 GW: 155

Heather in Texas

Can you tell me what CW and GW mean?

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Sure!

CW is current weight

GW is goal weight

Banded 2010 weight:327

Sleeved 12/28/16 weight:253

CW: 230 GW: 155

Heather in Texas

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yes!!!! I don't have an issue telling people what I'm doing to lose weight because I'm eating less and moving WAAAAY more. I have an issue with questions like "you did t like your food?" Or "you didn't eat very much." I have anxiety about eating around new people.....and I'm attempting to date so anxiety is an issue!

Banded 2010 weight:327

Sleeved 12/28/16 weight:253

CW: 230 GW: 155

Heather in Texas

I haven't really thought too much about going to restaurants with friends/ co workers. What do u usually say when people ask or comments from wait staff?

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Yes!!!! I don't have an issue telling people what I'm doing to lose weight because I'm eating less and moving WAAAAY more. I have an issue with questions like "you did t like your food? " Or "you didn't eat very much." I have anxiety about eating around new people.....and I'm attempting to date so anxiety is an issue!

Banded 2010 weight:327

Sleeved 12/28/16 weight:253

CW: 230 GW: 155

Heather in Texas

I haven't really thought too much about going to restaurants with friends/ co workers. What do u usually say when people ask or comments from wait staff?

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

I have gotten good about pushing food around on my plate where it looks like I ate more than I actually did! I also use the "I'm not feeling too great" excuse, but that doesn't really work 2 meals in a row. I really need suggestions from others who have faced this!!!

Banded 2010 weight:327

Sleeved 12/28/16 weight:253

CW: 230 GW: 155

Heather in Texas

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I told friends and family, and no one has said a thing to me about what I am or am not eating at a meal. It's just ignored. Only the waitress brings it up when she reminds me that the side dish I turned down comes with the meal and asks me if I want a box.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

As for people at the office asking what your surgery is, you have no obligation to tell them what is being operated on. I had a medical issue which needed attention, it's a private matter. If they ask again, ask if they had sex the night before. If they looked shocked, explain they have as much right to ask you personal medical questions as you have asking when the last time was they had sex.

Excellent! I'm going to give my nosey boss my doctor's note tonight & some co-workers are covering my shift for the week I'm gone. No one knows I'm doing this but I have to think of what to say if they ask. I love your suggestions!

Height 5'0"

Weight for consultation: 216 lbs.

Pre-op Weight: Unknown until January 20th.

My profile picture is not me. It's my "FitSpiration" body.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I told friends and family, and no one has said a thing to me about what I am or am not eating at a meal. It's just ignored. Only the waitress brings it up when she reminds me that the side dish I turned down comes with the meal and asks me if I want a box.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Really? Never? I have been only sleeved for 1 month and I get questions or comments all the time. I just don't know how to get around going to dinner with people. I try to suggest active dates and outings where we aren't just sitting and eating or where I have more time to eat. I didn't have that problem with the band, but I also wasn't dating or hanging with people that I didn't know. My family knows and some of them are also sleeved, so no big deal, but wait staff is always asking if I liked my meal because I didn't eat it!

Banded 2010 weight:327

Sleeved 12/28/16 weight:253

CW: 230 GW: 155

Heather in Texas

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have said this before, and it may apply here too. Tell people about your surgery to Inform them, NOT to Affirm you. If and when you are comfortable, you can share with others. I have been amazed at how many people are either thinking about WLS, or know someone who is considering it. I see it as a chance to counter the negative junk out there about WLS failures and complications.

If you tell no one, it is your choice and NO ONE should condemn you for your silence. Just be comfortable with who you are and who you will become once the surgery succeeds for you!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I haven't told any family or friends. I've been on this journey for quite some time on my own so I've already been bombarded with, "you look smaller what are you doing, etc." I've already lost a significant amount of weight on my own. I've been able to dodge all the other inquiries and probing quests with the truth. Working out like crazy, high Protein and watching what I put in my mouth.

I'm hoping after my sleeve I won't have to say much. I hope there's an even more significant loss in my weight that people notice even more. But I don't know if I'll actually be forthcoming about my surgery?

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You said it BigDog Bryan. I told my immediate team a week before surgery. They asked a few questions and then it was a non issue, which is what I wanted. I have run into both support and ignorance, but I was and still am very comfortable with my decision. If my experience can help someone else, then it is worth it. As far as being judged, I think we are judged no matter what we do. I know I was judged when I was 290 and I know I am still judged. It's what people do. Not worth worrying about. Be true to yourself and kind to others and enjoy the ride.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • KeeWee

      It's been 10 long years! Here is my VSG weight loss surgiversary update..
      https://www.ae1bmerchme.com/post/10-year-surgiversary-update-for-2024 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
      My general disposition lately is hopeful and motivated. The only thing that bugs me on a daily basis still is the way those supplements make my house smell. So stink! But I just bought a smell proof bag online that other people use to put their pot in. My house doesn't stink anymore. 
       
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BeanitoDiego

      Some days I feel like an infiltrator... I'm participating in society as a "thin" person. They have no idea that I haven't always been one of them! 🤣
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • ChunkCat

      Thank you everyone for your well wishes! I totally forgot I wrote an update here... I'm one week post op today. I gained 15 lbs in water weight overnight because they had to give me tons of fluids to bring my BP up after surgery! I stayed one night in the hospital. Everything has been fine except I seem to have picked up a bug while I was there and I've been running a low grade fever, coughing, and a sore throat. So I've been hydrating well and sleeping a ton. So far the Covid tests are negative.
      I haven't been able to advance my diet past purees. Everything I eat other than tofu makes me choke and feels like trying to swallow rocks. They warned me it would get worse before it gets better, so lets hope this is all normal. I have my follow up on Monday so we'll see. Living on shakes and soup again is not fun. I had enough of them the first time!! LOL 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×