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Divorce

JusttheBegininng

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LadyNada    0

LadyNada
Posted

Hope you are doing good and feel better. Certainly, none deserves to be disrespected or hurt. Nothing justifies hitting a women. Hope you get the clarity you need to do whatever you need to do.

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jaynamy3    122

jaynamy3
Posted

Do not consider yourself a statistic! You are blessed! You are a blessed child of God and blessed because he didn't do anything more than he did (which was way to much) but furthermore your blessed to have courage to be able to come on here and own up to all this. I for one am VERY proud of you! You have such a bright future ahead of you! Remember nothing is worse than KILLING THEM WITH KINDNESS! The nicer you are the more names you will be called and this will help you see the real man behind the mask. Keep your head up!

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Aggiemae    739

Aggiemae
Posted

Maybe you two need some time away from each other.

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If by "some time" you mean forever. Any man who hits a woman is not worthy of her. No second chances. No forgivness.

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pvechiola    195

pvechiola
Posted

My gastric sleeve was 11/7/16 and I wish nobody gets divorce after this surgery. I thought I would be one of the Lucky ones that wouldn't. That I had a supportive husband who loved me and would never do anything to jepordize

Our relationship. After 5 years of being married luckily with no kids I'm on the verge of a divorce. Maybe you get more courage while losing weight and you value yourself more . But I realized that I can't let my husband treat me Any way he wants. He got drunk tonight on New Year's Eve and after 5 hours of spending time with his brother and niece I told him let's go to bed tell them good night ( at 5 am). It got him so mad that he brought up things from 6 years ago while we were dating and called me a *****. I got mad and called him an alcoholic like his dad who abandoned him and he got even more mad. I threatened him with divorce and he was about to leave then I realized I didn't want to throw everything away for him being drunk and begged him to stay. He pushed me against the wall, slapped me and would keep pushing me off. His strength beat me and he finally left and went with his drunk brother to his moms house. No matter what I realized I can't let any man treat me this way and even before he left I told him he would regret this.' But no matter what I can't forgive him. My mom has always told me never to let any man put his hands on me so no matter what I can't forgive him. I'm glad I have the confidence to know that I don't deserve this but it sucks that I'm a stastistic about to be divorced. Again it sucks and I hope nobody ever goes through this. But just know that this surgery can make a lot of things change and only God knows what's best for us and why things happen

I've got alot of experience in abusive relationships, if a man hits you once he will do it again and again. Remember when God closes one door another one opens, think of yourself as very special because you can start over, that's being lucky, not spending time with a man who puts his hands on you. You're very lucky most women never get out. Best wishes on your journey, you're gonna have a blast.

Sent from my 0PM92 using the BariatricPal App

Don't just document with pictures of bruises and injuries, also call the police, if you have to hide a cell phone somewhere safe so you can get to it without him causing more problems that is a great idea, also counseling and anger management rarely work. I really will be praying for your safety and so that whatever your decision is you make the right choice for you.

You are a strong lady.No one ever has the right to hit you,alcohol or not.Once it starts it won't stop.Unless he gets major help.Protect yourself emotionally and physically.Document if he left marks.

Sent from my 0PM92 using the BariatricPal App

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Fredbear    397

Fredbear
Posted

People (men or women) who hit or throw things are not worth knowing, let alone be married to.

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JaneWR    1

JaneWR
Posted

Well, best you have decided to get divorced after the first time he hit you. For others it takes many, many assaults and a lot of abuse before they have their fill.

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Go To Topic Listing Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums

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    • Aunty Mamo

      Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
      My general disposition lately is hopeful and motivated. The only thing that bugs me on a daily basis still is the way those supplements make my house smell. So stink! But I just bought a smell proof bag online that other people use to put their pot in. My house doesn't stink anymore. 
       
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    • BeanitoDiego

      BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
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    • BeanitoDiego

      BeanitoDiego

      Some days I feel like an infiltrator... I'm participating in society as a "thin" person. They have no idea that I haven't always been one of them! 🤣
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    • ChunkCat

      ChunkCat

      Thank you everyone for your well wishes! I totally forgot I wrote an update here... I'm one week post op today. I gained 15 lbs in water weight overnight because they had to give me tons of fluids to bring my BP up after surgery! I stayed one night in the hospital. Everything has been fine except I seem to have picked up a bug while I was there and I've been running a low grade fever, coughing, and a sore throat. So I've been hydrating well and sleeping a ton. So far the Covid tests are negative.
      I haven't been able to advance my diet past purees. Everything I eat other than tofu makes me choke and feels like trying to swallow rocks. They warned me it would get worse before it gets better, so lets hope this is all normal. I have my follow up on Monday so we'll see. Living on shakes and soup again is not fun. I had enough of them the first time!! LOL 
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    • BeanitoDiego

      BeanitoDiego

      Still purging all of the larger clothing. This morning, a shirt that I ADORED wearing ended up on top. Hard to let it go, but it was also hard to let go of those habits that also no longer serve my highest good. Onward and upward!
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