People are starting to say stuff

[ryan_86 335]

So between May and my surgery in September I dropped 55 pounds. Since then, I've dropped another 45. No one said anything pre-op, but I'm starting to get compliments now. I've also learned that there was speculation around my office about my surgery (I only told my boss).

I'm not bothered by the compliments, but paired with the subtle hints on surgery, I'm a little miffed. I did all that work pre-op, and no one noticed. Now that people notice, it feels like surgery and not me is getting the credit.

In either case, people speculating about my medical issues is uncomfortable. No one has said anything unkind, but feels like my privacy has been invaded a bit.

And I've never been all that comfortable with compliments about my appearance. I guess I've always hoped people just didn't notice my appearance because of how bad I looked, and that instinct is still there even at a much healthier weight.

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[KCBO 18]

No one at my work knows either but I'm wondering how they will react. I've only lostb25 so far so no one has commented. Sometimes comments like that are based in jealousy. I know I was jealous of any woman who looked better than me. Not nice feelings but I'm being honest.

[highfunctioningfatman 2,675]

It was 60 pounds before anyone who didn't know said anything about me losing weight.

[sleeveisa 333]

Don't worry about what people say. You feel good, you look good and you are healthier

People need to worry about themselves. Good luck

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[teedsg 250]

@@ryan_86, don't worry about it. You are doing great! Some people just don't get it.

[Lucky2Lose 184]

Sometimes you have to drop a certain amount from your frame before people take notice. I wouldn't get paranoid about thinking people are talking about you and that you must have got surgery. You're losing weight and feeling great..that's what counts..let the haters hate..Good luck!

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[LittleBill 2,231]

I've had a couple of people I know professionally say something, usually along the lines of "You've lost weight!" I always respond with "Maybe a pound or two". Most will let it drop at that point, but a few have challenged me on the amount. It hasn't gotten any further than that though, and I am down almost 110 since the start.

[Heather I 500]

Just speaking for myself, the only times I lost significant weight (40 lbs on WW a decade ago, and now 45 lbs since surgery 9/19,) no one noticed until I hit 40 lbs for me!

I'm a little miffed in one aspect that I'm not getting complimented, LOL, but then I see how far I have to go still to get out of the 200s and closer to just an "overweight" BMI, etc., etc., that I get it -- 40-45 lbs is a LOT of weight, but when you are close to 300 and a girl -- well, it's a drop in the bucket.

I expect you probably didn't change clothes too much on the pre-op, but now that you are close to -100 lbs, you must be dressing differently, in new, maybe more fitted clothes? 100 lbs is going to show now.

I have no words of advice, but be proud of what you've done for yourself. The accolades (and gossip) will come later. You did this for you, not the audience down the line.

Congratulations on kicking butt!

[DeletedMember 715]

Very few people outside my family know about my surgery. However, one of the few that does was making a comment about how much weight I've lost and how she needs to take off a few pounds but no matter what she tries she can't get any weight off.

I told her about the plan I had been following before surgery and how effective it was, etc. And she says (as if she wasn't listening at all) "well, you had medical help! It's different for me".

Then I reminded her that I lost 50lbs in 6 weeks PRIOR to surgery, so there must be some merit to the plan I was following.

So, I hear you. People like to attribute everything to the surgery and nothing to the individual. Honestly, I think part of that's a coping mechanism. If you've had surgery, then you didn't do anything to lose weight, therefore they don't have to feel bad about you losing weight and them not.

Meh. This is why I didn't tell anyone. This is my health, my journey, my results. And I couldn't be happier. And they are right about one thing. I couldn't have done it without the surgery. Lord knows I tried.

[Hammer_Down 631]

Only my inlaws and parents know about my wife's and my surgery.

My mother in law was Christmas shopping with a cousin who was close to her and my wife growing up. Her cousin saw a clothing item she thought my wife would like and mother in law commented that my wife has lost some weight and is still losing and she didn't know what size, and wasn't sure how long it would fit.

Her cousin commented "well, she won't lose that much that it would really matter" and mother in law said she was down 25lbs. Her cousin was agape and asked how she had lost 25 lbs (my wife is 5'3" and was about 180lbs preop).

Mother in law replied that we are really watching what we eat and restricting portions. Which is true.

[Healthy_life2 8,319]

@@ryan_86

Congratulations on all your hard work!

People are just judgmental. Some feel free to comment when your heavy. They will also talk about you after goal.

The attention around your weight loss feels a bit uncomfortable right? Even positive attention is an adjustment. I went from invisible to attention. I didn't know how to respond. I had to give myself a compliment scale.( I have no Idea why this helped me)

(1) Appropriate- I give a quick thank you and move on.

(2) Hilarious - Makes a great NSV story.

(3) Creepy - Need I say more.

The attention will fade after your weight loss stops. People will accept that this is just you.

Keep supportive people around you and ignore the rest.