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Feeling annoyed with my bf... need advice

krazykristen

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krazykristen    61

krazykristen
Posted

So Im having my sleeve surgery on October 5th. And my boyfriend mentioned us going to this outdoor event on October 14th, about a week or so after my surgery. I told him that was fine as long as Im able to get up and walk around fine. He kinda smarted off and said, "you act like this is a major surgery or something." Ugh. Makes me so mad. Its like hes taking this lightly and not seriously and idk what to say to him. It kinda hurt my feelings. Any advice?

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OutsideMatchInside    10,166

OutsideMatchInside
Posted (edited)

Umm it is major surgery. How old is your BF?

You can probably go to this outdoor event fine, but if there is a lot of walking you might get tired, if the weather is still warm (it was 90 here today) the heat might wear you out.

Do you live with him?

Maybe when he sees you in the hospital, he will understand it isn't a casual thing.

I could say more but I'm going to play it cool for once. Good luck.

Edited by OutsideMatchInside

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krazykristen    61

krazykristen
Posted

And yes I do live with him. Not really sure about how its gonna work after my surgery. He seems supportive yet says crap like that and it really frustrates me. For the past 2 years Ive devoted my time and effort to HIS 4 year old kid so now is my time to focus on myself for once and he acts weird about it.

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Christinamo7    4,041

Christinamo7
Posted

hopefully he just is a little bit clueless.

However, if you have no complications, you should be fine unless it is too hot. then dehydration could be an issue. I didn't have a hernia repair or anything and I just got tired a little more easily at that point. There's just no way to know ahead of time how your recovery would be - so I'd have a back up plan, i.e. if tickets have to be purchased who else could go with him if you are just not up to it?

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Dub    9,922

Dub
Posted

Tell that sumbitch to grow a pair and support you.

If it's too hot by your standards then.....it's too hot.....period.

If it's too hot to walk by your standards then......it's too hot.....period.

Punkassmofo.

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OutsideMatchInside    10,166

OutsideMatchInside
Posted

Yeah my friends in Texas have been posting temps in the 100s on Facebook. Not good for recovering from surgery. You might have a lot of energy post-op, I did, but I would get tired very fast. I would go from being full of energy to exhausted almost instantly.

Just tell him you aren't going and leave it at that, then you don't have to worry about getting there and wanting to go home, or wasting money on a ticket or whatever.

If this is his attitude now, this does not bode well for the future of your relationship.

Is he otherwise supportive of your choice or does he see it as an overall inconvenience?

And now I am going to be nosey, you shouldn't be taking care of some dudes kid without a ring and his last name. When you start focusing on yourself and taking care of yourself and looking better, he is probably going to show out with you. Like sit in front of you and eat all your favorites when you are 3 weeks out and on purees.

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krazykristen    61

krazykristen
Posted

Tell that sumbitch to grow a pair and support you.

If it's too hot by your standards then.....it's too hot.....period.

If it's too hot to walk by your standards then......it's too hot.....period.

Punkassmofo.

Lmaooooo you made me laugh.

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krazykristen    61

krazykristen
Posted

Yeah my friends in Texas have been posting temps in the 100s on Facebook. Not good for recovering from surgery. You might have a lot of energy post-op, I did, but I would get tired very fast. I would go from being full of energy to exhausted almost instantly.

Just tell him you aren't going and leave it at that, then you don't have to worry about getting there and wanting to go home, or wasting money on a ticket or whatever.

If this is his attitude now, this does not bode well for the future of your relationship.

Is he otherwise supportive of your choice or does he see it as an overall inconvenience?

And now I am going to be nosey, you shouldn't be taking care of some dudes kid without a ring and his last name. When you start focusing on yourself and taking care of yourself and looking better, he is probably going to show out with you. Like sit in front of you and eat all your favorites when you are 3 weeks out and on purees.

Youre right, and part of me just wants to be alone through this process... idk.

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OutsideMatchInside    10,166

OutsideMatchInside
Posted

Can you be alone? Can you move out? Are there other issues? Maybe even just recover at home with your family?

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krazykristen    61

krazykristen
Posted

Unfortunately the apartment is in my name and I cant get out of it until next June. He has no where to go if I kicked him out. I have family I can stay with but sometimes I think I stay because Im so insecure.

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OutsideMatchInside    10,166

OutsideMatchInside
Posted

@@krazykristen

Can you cover the rent if he is gone? I mean honestly it already sounds like this relationship has an expiration date.

When you lose weight, feel better, and have more confidence, he is not going to be able to hang.

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krazykristen    61

krazykristen
Posted

@@krazykristen

Can you cover the rent if he is gone? I mean honestly it already sounds like this relationship has an expiration date.

When you lose weight, feel better, and have more confidence, he is not going to be able to hang.

I would need a roommate. And I know. But at this point Im just saying screw it and focusing on myself and if he can't hang then PEACE!

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OutsideMatchInside    10,166

OutsideMatchInside
Posted

Just start planning for the worst and hope for the best.

Do you have friends that can help you post-op if he refuses?

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krazykristen    61

krazykristen
Posted

Just start planning for the worst and hope for the best.

Do you have friends that can help you post-op if he refuses?

Oh yeah. Im pretty good at taking care of myself but I have friends and family who are super supportive. Im just not feeling that secure with our relationship at the moment. Theres a lot going on so I dont really know how to handle this. I see so many stories of people who break up after surgery and its hard to think about. But at the same time I gotta do what makes me happy and losing weight and feeling good about myself will get me there so Im not letting anyone ruin my happiness anymore

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