You put in the time.

You put in the money.

You go to all the appointments and you jump through all the hoops.

You do the pre-op diet.

You have the surgery.

You cared enough about yourself to make the commitment to WLS and you physically and permanently alter your body...


And then you get mad because someone tells you not to eat the d@mn taco? Not to drink alcohol or soda 2.783 days after surgery? To put down the freaking pizza'? To stop eating bread/rice/pasta/bananas/hoagies/20oz steaks TEMPORARILY while your body heals and you get to your goal weight? To actually stick to YOUR doctor's plan?

Even better, you get mad when they only do so AFTER you ASKED????

SERIOUSLY PEOPLE?

Yes. I'd guess most of us have head hunger and cravings. I'd guess most of us had a nibble or sip of something off plan. I've no doubt that most of us were not 100% compliant 100% of the time. But I'd also guess that those of us who have done this, gotten to goal weight and stayed there have been compliant the majority of the time. I'd also guess that many of us who have been successful would appreciate a swift kick in the rear if/when we ask a question I bet we already know the answer to.

It's not rocket science and this isn't Romper Room. Make good choices, stick to your doctor's orders or don't, but don't get mad if you fail to get the results you want when you refuse to do what you are supposed to do. And don't get mad when someone tells you that what you are putting in your mouth isn't the best idea in the world even though you want it right now.

Value yourself more than that. Seriously.

After the last incident we had here, I had to detach or stop posting. This is my only connection to surgery so I still need to post here, so I detached.

^^^This!!!

I have been on this site since January of 2013 and it really is one of my only resources for support. I stay because "I" need this site, but I mostly lurk because of all of the ignorant posters. I don't care if they don't have proper pre-or post-op instructions or an inadequate bariatric team. IT IS ON US TO DO THE RESEARCH!!! In my opinion, there is NO excuse for not being prepared for what you are in store for after WLS. I sure as hell made every effort to educate myself before I drastically changed my life, and 3 years later, I am still learning and hope I always do.

I-O!

@@WLSResources/ClothingExch **Ptish-tosh. You'll be criticized for something or other, so why wait? Make something up now and get the inevitable over with. It's the bariatric version of "lie back and think of England."**

This is the VERY best thing I've ever read on BP. Thank you, I'll be able to laugh my way through a crappy Monday because of this

@@mrsNilla

Yes, you will end up dead immediately if you jump out of a plane without a parachute, not in 10 years as an indirect result of a compilation of single actions. You kind of missed the entire point of my post, but you made some new friends. Congrats, lol.

@@LipstickLady

Lol ok, yes good point, I forgot about the 20oz steak questions. That would be a NO on the "should" and the "can", haha.

And, for the record, this is an area where you and I substantially disagree, but I don't feel like we do so in a way that is offensive, or at least I've never been offended by you not agreeing with me, lol. There are a few others on here who also disagree with me on a lot of things, but that's kind of the point of being part of an online community that isn't ruined with groupthink. You can have everyone always agreeing, which really accomplishes nothing, or you can have respectful conflict...the latter is far more fun and ultimately far more valuable.

XOXO

"I can jump out of an airplane without a parachute, but I will end up dead.
So I shouldn't do it."

One of the things my surgeon always says (after listing the things he doesn't want me to do) is "...and don't jump out of a plane without a parachute."

LOL, maybe all surgeons should add this to their list of instructions!

Edited September 26, 20169 yr by kimini

@@LipstickLady

Lol ok, yes good point, I forgot about the 20oz steak questions. That would be a NO on the "should" and the "can", haha.

And, for the record, this is an area where you and I substantially disagree, but I don't feel like we do so in a way that is offensive, or at least I've never been offended by you not agreeing with me, lol. There are a few others on here who also disagree with me on a lot of things, but that's kind of the point of being part of an online community that isn't ruined with groupthink. You can have everyone always agreeing, which really accomplishes nothing, or you can have respectful conflict...the latter is far more fun and ultimately far more valuable.

XOXO

Wait! You mean we can agree/disagree like adults?

:faint:

You're killing my reputation!

Tell us what you really think....

I was part of a conversation once and I was actually told by this person that her Dr. was always criticizing her about losing weight.

She stated: " I wish I can find a Dr. that works only with fat people"

My Dr. is such a pain.

Yes, there seems to be many unlearned people on this forum...but they are the ones who need to see others example

@@WLSResources/ClothingExch **Ptish-tosh. You'll be criticized for something or other, so why wait? Make something up now and get the inevitable over with. It's the bariatric version of "lie back and think of England."**

This is the VERY best thing I've ever read on BP. Thank you, I'll be able to laugh my way through a crappy Monday because of this

That is funny.

Thanks for the rant. I had lunch with a friend yesterday, the dude is now in the place where he realizes WLS could be a great thing for him. No doubt he needs it, diabetic, CPAP et.al. I'm now the second guy he knows who has had the surgery and he has seen both of us change our lives for the good and he's ready to move on it. As I see him asking questions I think of some of the silly posts I have seen and realize "dang I was in that spot." WLS is not a subject they teach in high school or college. You have to learn all this on your own. I am blessed in that I do research on a multitude of subjects all the time, but not everyone has the training or skills to do it, so it is great that Alex set up this site to help people find answers.

But I will remind everyone of this one incontrovertible fact...half of the worlds population is below average. That's just a mathematical reality.

All that said, I do really enjoy this site...silly people aside, the inspiration I get from people who are changing their lives for the good keeps me going. I can't tell you how good it makes me feel when I read about someone who can get into an airplane seat without an extender and when someone does a 5K, and when their significant other can finally give them a full body hug. I'm glad there is a place where we can share these experiences.

I count it a privilege to contribute where I can, and I thank everyone who has the courage to share their trials and accomplishments. We are a very unique community.

Yep, I agree all around. I'm an adult so take complete ownership of my own eating, good and bad. "Porkchopgate"! Love that term!

Having said all of that, I inadvertently set myself up and had a very bad food day today, first one since surgery six weeks ago. Not gonna ask for sympathy. Don't need it, anyway. Confession cures all.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

...the inspiration I get from people who are changing their lives for the good keeps me going. I can't tell you how good it makes me feel when I read about someone who can get into an airplane seat without an extender and when someone does a 5K, and when their significant other can finally give them a full body hug. I'm glad there is a place where we can share these experiences.

And this is exactly the reason I stay.

Yep, I agree all around. I'm an adult so take complete ownership of my own eating, good and bad. "Porkchopgate"! Love that term!

Having said all of that, I inadvertently set myself up and had a very bad food day today, first one since surgery six weeks ago. Not gonna ask for sympathy. Don't need it, anyway. Confession cures all.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

What did you eat so we can give you a firm and proper lashing???

Does anyone know how I can unsubscribe to this mess of drama so my emails are not getting blown up??? I know it's off topic and I apologize but I want out of this drama of a mess.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

change your email address that is attached to this app and the notifications will go to the other email address and you won't be bothered.

@@LipstickLady Amen!

I get it. Sometimes I'm incredulous and other times I manage to look the other way. The latter is more productive for me. It's one thing to waste time on myself, quite another to waste it on a stranger. Yet I know I'll be sucked in again. A favorite are the ones hoping not to be required to lose weight pre-surgery, preferring to keep gorging until the OR. They get major huffy when I write that surgery is a grown-up proposition and losing weight prior announces that one is serious.

Hope you feel better for ranting.

I'm not real good at looking away if you haven't noticed.

Why? Because there are SO MANY LURKERS in this forum who are reading, reading, reading and if no one speaks up, they are absorbing bad advice and patronizing warm fuzzy validations.

Am I wasting my time? Absolutely. Am I ever going to win any popularity contests for having strong opinions and a big mouth? Probably not. (And I really don't care. I have real life friends who live outside my computer.) Did I get my fair share of finger shakes', eye rolls and kicks in the pants as I went through this process? YUP. Did I learn from those "meanies"? Without a doubt (and DANG I miss them!!) Was I always happy about it? NO FREAKING WAY. But I listened and ultimately, I earned back my health and a MUCH smaller number on the scale.

Giving myself permission to eat what I wanted against the advice of WWs and Jenny Craig and Atkins and South Beach and my doctor got me to 264 pounds. Clearly I **didn't** know my body best and caving to the head hunger and cravings did some permanent damage to my body that can never be undone.

So if even one person can be reached and jolted back into their new reality of WLS, FABULOUS. That's why I waste my time.

No, they are not absorbing bad advice even if lurking they are reading it all.. I do.. And perhaps some of the snide impatient comments I'll make them not want to pose their question?.. Just a thought.. Not everyone is.. Hmmmm what word.. Self confident n secure as you are? So although it seems like a stupid question to you.. Thy need assurance 1 way or another.. Some people need hand held.. Some of us don't.. If you see a post by 1 of those people you have no patience for.. Then move past it

Munky

I get it. Sometimes I'm incredulous and other times I manage to look the other way. The latter is more productive for me. It's one thing to waste time on myself, quite another to waste it on a stranger. Yet I know I'll be sucked in again. A favorite are the ones hoping not to be required to lose weight pre-surgery, preferring to keep gorging until the OR. They get major huffy when I write that surgery is a grown-up proposition and losing weight prior announces that one is serious.

Hope you feel better for ranting.

I'm not real good at looking away if you haven't noticed.

Why? Because there are SO MANY LURKERS in this forum who are reading, reading, reading and if no one speaks up, they are absorbing bad advice and patronizing warm fuzzy validations.

Am I wasting my time? Absolutely. Am I ever going to win any popularity contests for having strong opinions and a big mouth? Probably not. (And I really don't care. I have real life friends who live outside my computer.) Did I get my fair share of finger shakes', eye rolls and kicks in the pants as I went through this process? YUP. Did I learn from those "meanies"? Without a doubt (and DANG I miss them!!) Was I always happy about it? NO FREAKING WAY. But I listened and ultimately, I earned back my health and a MUCH smaller number on the scale.

Giving myself permission to eat what I wanted against the advice of WWs and Jenny Craig and Atkins and South Beach and my doctor got me to 264 pounds. Clearly I **didn't** know my body best and caving to the head hunger and cravings did some permanent damage to my body that can never be undone.

So if even one person can be reached and jolted back into their new reality of WLS, FABULOUS. That's why I waste my time.

No, they are not absorbing bad advice even if lurking they are reading it all.. I do.. And perhaps some of the snide impatient comments I'll make them not want to pose their question?.. Just a thought.. Not everyone is.. Hmmmm what word.. Self confident n secure as you are? So although it seems like a stupid question to you.. Thy need assurance 1 way or another.. Some people need hand held.. Some of us don't.. If you see a post by 1 of those people you have no patience for.. Then move past it

Munky

If no one opposes the bad advice, it will seemingly be good advice, though, wouldn't you imagine? And please tell me when/where I have ever called someone (or their question) stupid? Nope. You can't because I don't.

I'm not going to pander to anyone and I am not going to change who I am because some people want validation to eat ... let's see, just in the last few days alone ... ice cream, swedish fish, Pasta, noodles and rice just days and weeks post op. Nope. Not going to validate it and I'm not going to just move past it.

Sorry, not sorry.