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Body Dysmorphia

beachwalker4rny

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beachwalker4rny    95

beachwalker4rny
Posted

I'm not sure if I have this or not but when I look in the mirror I don't see that I have lost 71 lbs. all I see is how big my stomach, butt and thighs still are. I don't like being mentally negative like this. I am not at goal yet but I think this mental negativity is not productive. Anyone felt like this? How did you overcome these feelings? I should add that there are days that I can really see progress and it is encouraging. Today though I feel negative. :(

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BandtoSleevechick    171

BandtoSleevechick
Posted

71 pounds?! That's awesome and no joking matter!! Is there anyway you can focus on the way your clothes feel and look on you when you look in the mirror instead of what you don't like? i am the same way with my stomach.. i have some bumps and rolls lol and i zone into that spot. Never fails. Why not a walk or a quick video / gym time to get cardio in.. it always changes my moods from bad to good. One of my right now favorite quotes is The only motivation you need is staring back at you in the mirror. Best of luck!

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lifeofblair    308

lifeofblair
Posted

I'm the same way. I hope one day I can see myself the way others do, but I'm not there yet.

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James Marusek    5,244

James Marusek
Posted

One of the things that I did prior to surgery was take a before photograph. And then 6 months later I took an after photograph. I replicated the same pose.

Many people cannot see the changes after weight loss surgery. In my case I was the photographer in the family so I never appeared in the photographs. When I looked in the mirror all I saw was a straight on shot, so it was easy to overlook my weight. So my before and after photo was the best way to overcome my inability to see and appreciate my weight loss.

Operation.jpg

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Cervidae    2,389

Cervidae
Posted

I have days where I feel amazing and proud of myself, and can really appreciate just how far I've come. Then I have days when I look in the mirror and feel gross and ugly, and like I look just as bad as I did a year ago when I was 170 pounds heavier. I've seriously lost almost 200 pounds and I STILL feel this way sometimes, it's ridiculous. Our bodies change rapidly during this process, but our minds are going to take some time and effort. If only the surgery could fix our self-esteem like it fixes our appetites. :)

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beachwalker4rny    95

beachwalker4rny
Posted

I have days where I feel amazing and proud of myself, and can really appreciate just how far I've come. Then I have days when I look in the mirror and feel gross and ugly, and like I look just as bad as I did a year ago when I was 170 pounds heavier. I've seriously lost almost 200 pounds and I STILL feel this way sometimes, it's ridiculous. Our bodies change rapidly during this process, but our minds are going to take some time and effort. If only the surgery could fix our self-esteem like it fixes our appetites. :)

I could have written this myself! This is exactly the way I feel!

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beachwalker4rny    95

beachwalker4rny
Posted

One of the things that I did prior to surgery was take a before photograph. And then 6 months later I took an after photograph. I replicated the same pose.

Many people cannot see the changes after weight loss surgery. In my case I was the photographer in the family so I never appeared in the photographs. When I looked in the mirror all I saw was a straight on shot, so it was easy to overlook my weight. So my before and after photo was the best way to overcome my inability to see and appreciate my weight loss.

Operation.jpg

James, thank you for sharing your pictures! I should be more diligent to document as I go. When seen side by side like that you can see quite a dramatic difference.

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lifeofblair    308

lifeofblair
Posted

When I went for my 6 mo post op they took pics (also took before). That was the first time I could actually see the difference and man was it a big one.

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Learningtolive    109

Learningtolive
Posted

I also feel like I could've written that. I've cried to my therapist several times about this to be honest. I have those days where I feel like I've made no progress, or I'm not making any more progress. I jiggle my stomach or thighs and want to cry. I'm around 180 right now, we started around same size, etc. I feel this ALOT. One thing that hit home was when I actually put on a size 14 pair of pants, and this past weekend shopping for size Large shirts, which I haven't worn since high school. It's hard. I try to use those moments when I feel down or don't see what others see, to realize how far I have truly come and how much healthier I feel.

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pmanley    45

pmanley
Posted

It is funny that I would see this post today. I was just telling husband that every time (every day) I put on my size 18 pants I look at them and think *who am I kidding...these aren't going to fit* and then as if by magic the slip on and button...I don't see myself as smaller either. I don't dwell on it but it is very real and hard to get over. I made myself go and buy clothes that fit so that I can get used to being the new smaller me.

The struggle is real! Congrats on the weightloss...keep it up!

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Go To Topic Listing Gastric Bypass Surgery Forums

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    • Aunty Mamo

      Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
      My general disposition lately is hopeful and motivated. The only thing that bugs me on a daily basis still is the way those supplements make my house smell. So stink! But I just bought a smell proof bag online that other people use to put their pot in. My house doesn't stink anymore. 
       
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    • BeanitoDiego

      BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
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    • BeanitoDiego

      BeanitoDiego

      Some days I feel like an infiltrator... I'm participating in society as a "thin" person. They have no idea that I haven't always been one of them! 🤣
      · 0 replies
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    • ChunkCat

      ChunkCat

      Thank you everyone for your well wishes! I totally forgot I wrote an update here... I'm one week post op today. I gained 15 lbs in water weight overnight because they had to give me tons of fluids to bring my BP up after surgery! I stayed one night in the hospital. Everything has been fine except I seem to have picked up a bug while I was there and I've been running a low grade fever, coughing, and a sore throat. So I've been hydrating well and sleeping a ton. So far the Covid tests are negative.
      I haven't been able to advance my diet past purees. Everything I eat other than tofu makes me choke and feels like trying to swallow rocks. They warned me it would get worse before it gets better, so lets hope this is all normal. I have my follow up on Monday so we'll see. Living on shakes and soup again is not fun. I had enough of them the first time!! LOL 
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    • BeanitoDiego

      BeanitoDiego

      Still purging all of the larger clothing. This morning, a shirt that I ADORED wearing ended up on top. Hard to let it go, but it was also hard to let go of those habits that also no longer serve my highest good. Onward and upward!
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