I'm currently waiting to hear back from insurance. Sitting at work today, I began thinking about my final "Yes, I'm making an appointment to see a surgeon and moving forward with WLS" moment. It had always been something I knew was available, but it had never been a realistic thought.

My "Yep. This is happening moment": 6 months ago I was at the doctor, stepped on the scale and out of habit...or not thinking I said "230-ish" to the nurse. Confused, she looked at me and slowly moved the weight up...because obviously I weighed more. Then it clicked, my head dropped and I said "Sorry, I meant 330." I felt my blood rush to my face, my heart sink to my stomach and the reality of the number set in.

In that moment everything clicked. The fact that my food addiction had spiraled out of control and my inability to drop the weight. It also clicked how badly I wanted a happy and healthy lifestyle. I follow SO many healthy living blogs, instagram accounts and facebook pages. I knew what I wanted, but didn't know where to begin. I had to face the fact that my weight was the highest it's ever been and I needed to fix it.

Immediately after leaving the doctor, I made an appointment with my surgeon, a mental health therapist and a dietitian. Finding a tool to help me reach my goal and finding the WLS Online community has been amazing. Hopefully within weeks I'll know if I'm approved and if I'm not...I won't stop trying.

What was your "I'm doing this" moment?

for me, it was seeing myself on video interacting with others..I almost didn't recognize myself. I kept thinking, is this how I walk? breath? look? every year I've been growing more and more uncomfortable in my body. I remember in 2010 going to the doctor and joking with the nurse that I was a taco or two from being 200 pounds. (I'm 4'11 & I was 175 then. I'm 221 pounds now)

I'd tried to lose weight on my own, I've tried every diet under the sun..even went vegan for 6 months...lost weight but it was little and it came back with a vengeance. I was so desperate, my joints ached, I was on medication and the symptoms for PCOS were relentless. I had actually googled how to be successful at bullemia and when I did an ad popped up for my local bariatric surgeons office..I clicked the link and started the process. It's the tool that I need. I've spent the last 8 months educating myself and preparing for a huge lifestyle change. My pre op diet begins in 3 wks.

for me, it was seeing myself on video interacting with others..I almost didn't recognize myself. I kept thinking, is this how I walk? breath? look?

Funny you mention the breathing. Yesterday when looking at my FB memories from last year I watched a video I had posted of my dogs. All I could hear was my heavy breathing. I was humiliated that I didn't realize that I was so out of shape just standing there I sounded like I ran a marathon. I would have muted it before posting if I had known! I had no idea that's how I sound breathing!

Finding out my insurance would pay. I had looked into it years ago, but ins would never pay. When it changed, I called immediately.

A few years earlier, my mom had passed due to heart failure due to a heart attack she'd had after struggling with high blood pressure. She, like me, had gone up and down with her weight her whole life.

It was when my blood pressure read 159/96 I'd decided I was not going to die at 69 like my mom had if I could help it.

The rest is history. I plan to be the one to break the cycle of relatively early death that runs in my family.

It's almost as if you wrote "my story". My mom was 68 when she passed away. She was a very old 68!

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When I came to grips with the reality that I can't lose the weight and keep it off on my own.

I was Reffing a Wrestling match and dropped down to check for the pin, and didn't think I was going to get back up. I was drenched in sweat and everyone thought I was gonna pass out

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When I was sitting in my office chair and it began to lower on it's own. I exceeded the weight limit!

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This may sound shallow but my absolute final straw was when my shoe size went up and wider. It's been building obviously for years, diabetes, loss of ability to do sports. Unable to keep any weight off. But the shoe thing set me off more determined than ever. It's funny how a little thing can just tip the balance

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