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Surgery Date set..... but still not sure

67GTONUT

By 67GTONUT, in Gastric Sleeve Surgery Forums

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67GTONUT    28

67GTONUT
Posted

Well,

I have a date.... But wife is really not on board with this decision...

I will continue the process, but still not 100% on doing this because I do not want to upset her....

I had my 1st appointment with Dietitian last month.... In April, I will have my appointment with the Pscyh person....

In the meantime, I promised my wife I will just keep on trying to lose the weight on my own...

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JamieLogical    8,684

JamieLogical
Posted

My husband was not on board with my surgery either. He didn't think I needed it. He thought my decision to have it was coming from a place of weakness. And he initially lost some respect for me because of it. Now I am 19 months post-op and he sees how much our lives have improved. He has a more objective perspective on the whole thing. And he has FINALLY come around. I just made a post about it a week or two ago here:

http://www.bariatricpal.com/topic/362447-my-husband-finally-gets-it/

You have to make this decision for yourself. No one can know the realities of your daily struggles and what is in your mind and heart besides you. Your wife is likely operating from a position of fear or lack of understanding. While it would be lovely to have her support, you shouldn't sacrifice you health and future happiness just to alleviate her short-term fears.

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67GTONUT    28

67GTONUT
Posted

Yeah.....

She feels I am not heavy enough to resort to this...

She is worried about our relationship, since most of our interaction is related to eating out...

I feel I am heavy enough for this..... plus being Type II Diabetic and sleep Apnea, make this essential ....

As far as our relationship, I think we will be fine. We can still go out to dinner, but instead of having 3 courses and still being hungry.... I look forward to ordering just a simple Protein appitizer and being satisfied, and if I am not hungry.... I will have no issues just enjoying good conversation while she finishes her meal....

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JamieLogical    8,684

JamieLogical
Posted

Yeah, going out isn't as big a deal as people thing. My husband and I go out to eat all the time still. Just went out on Friday and will probably go out again tonight. It's easy to find things and just get a to-go box for the rest. Sometimes my husband and I will even share an entree if we know that one has enough meat for us to split and then he can just fill the rest of the way up on sides. Attending social events hasn't been a big deal either. Most of the time, no one even notices what other people are eating. And there is almost always at least SOMETHING I can eat.

Diabetes and sleep apnea are serious issues. She should be wanting to keep you healthy and around as long as possible! This surgery could literally save your life!

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67GTONUT    28

67GTONUT
Posted

Thank you for responding....

Will update as my journey continues....

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ciaobella707    5

ciaobella707
Posted

I just got my surgery date for September 26th! I cannot wait and neither can my husband...now....at first he was a little hesitant, as well, but now after all the research we've done he's on board with it. He's a person who has never had a weight problem so he doesn't understand the struggle that we go through to lose weight. I also have sleep apnea and cannot wait to no longer need a cpap!! I hope your wife gets on board for you...your health should be the most important thing...not whether or not she'll have an eating buddy.

Sent from my SM-G935V using the BariatricPal App

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time for june    195

time for june
Posted

I am schedule for Sept. 13th (this is the third surgery date). I backed out two other times because I feel that my husband was not supportive. Since those two times I have gained more weight and my energy level stinks. I have decided to stop trying to please others and that I am my own person and biggest support of ME so......pre-op diet starts Aug. 29th and this time I say BRING IT ON!!!

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JamieLogical    8,684

JamieLogical
Posted

I am schedule for Sept. 13th (this is the third surgery date). I backed out two other times because I feel that my husband was not supportive. Since those two times I have gained more weight and my energy level stinks. I have decided to stop trying to please others and that I am my own person and biggest support of ME so......pre-op diet starts Aug. 29th and this time I say BRING IT ON!!!

I am so so glad you have decided to finally do this for YOURSELF. My husband wasn't supportive either, but it is one of the best choices I've ever made for myself!

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sarajeano    28

sarajeano
Posted

My doctor told me that I don't have to justify this surgery to anyone. That it is not a weakness..he said if anyone tells me I took the easy way out, I should tell them "yes I did." He said if someone breaks their arm and they put a cast on, would you say they took the easy way out? Yes, because there was a solution to the problem and you took it.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

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ciaobella707    5

ciaobella707
Posted

My doctor told me that I don't have to justify this surgery to anyone. That it is not a weakness..he said if anyone tells me I took the easy way out, I should tell them "yes I did." He said if someone breaks their arm and they put a cast on, would you say they took the easy way out? Yes, because there was a solution to the problem and you took it.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Yes!!

Sent from my SM-G935V using the BariatricPal App

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JamieLogical    8,684

JamieLogical
Posted

My doctor told me that I don't have to justify this surgery to anyone. That it is not a weakness..he said if anyone tells me I took the easy way out, I should tell them "yes I did." He said if someone breaks their arm and they put a cast on, would you say they took the easy way out? Yes, because there was a solution to the problem and you took it.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

This is what I never understood about people saying surgery is the "easy way out". Though I always used the knee replacement metaphor, because it is also surgery with about the same mortality/complication rate. How is a surgical solution to a serious health problem ever a bad thing?!?!

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