just want to know I'm not alone....

[kranky813 477]

My surgery was on August 20th. Surgery went great, no complications and I was released from the hospital the next day (Friday). I went home and fell asleep and slept all the way through to the next morning. I was up for about an hour and fell back asleep on Saturday. When I woke up it was about noon and I realized that I felt horrible, it was so bad I couldn't even think straight. I called my surgeon and he said to get into the ER right away. I was so nauseated and dizzy, I just cried and cried the whole way to the hospital. Once there they admitted me and gave me IV Fluids and Nausea Meds (pain meds too - thank heavens). I was in the hospital from Saturday - Sunday. Honestly, it was so nice to be there. I didn't have to worry about drinking anything. I didn't want to even smell food and I was in a drug induced haze the entire time I was there

Monday when I went home it was fairly easy but then Tuesday came along. I have been able to get my 64oz of Fluid in on Tuesday and today but I have been having the worst buyers remorse in the world. I keep thinking what have I done to myself. I am on Clear liquids until next friday and am so sick of drinking I want to scream. My entire day consists of my timer going off every 15 minutes to remind me to drink. I am light headed - sort of foggy most of the time and hunger has just started. I can't do a single thing about it right now because of the clear liquid diet and all I do is cry and cry.

My husband has been so supportive letting me know that the first few weeks are hard but please, does is really get better? I read so many stories of people who breeze through recovery. I just need to know that I'm not alone and that this will get better and the feelings of remorse and regret will go away. That I will feel normal again and not so depressed all the time.

Thanks!

[kranky813 477]

Typo - I was in the hospital from Saturday to Monday with Dehydration.

[hockeyfan7 249]

It will get better. You will pass the liquids phase and the soft foods phase and get to real food.

What are you drinking for Clear Liquids? Have you had Gatorade or Powerade?

[kranky813 477]

Yes, my clear liquids have been Water, Powerade, broth, diluted juices, SF Popsicles. I'm so anxious to try anything else it's driving me in sane. I think that is where the remorse comes in. Not feeling like myself and not having anything to comfort myself.

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

Yes, it gets better.

In fact, it gets much, much better.

It gets so much better you cannot even BELIEVE right now how much better it will get.

:)

This is the sucky time.

So go find some "one year anniversary with pix" threads here and read those. And imagine you being one year out and at or below 140 pounds (your weight loss goal) and wearing a size [insert your dream size here] and looking 15 years younger and having more energy than a baby goat.

:)

The first week is really tough. And the first month may not be so great either. But after that it'll all seem so much more normal.

And within months you'll be able to eat (gradually) everything you couldn't possibly eat right now. But just not as much. But you won't freak out over that either because ... you / we / I all ate like pigs before VSG. Do you want to eat like that again? No, I knew you didn't.

Instead, you want to wear Size [yeah, that one] and weigh [yeah, that weight] and look like [just imagine it] and be so proud of yourself you could bust.

:)

Feeling better yet?

[camsmom08 10]

I feel like you wrote my story out for me. I had a very similar hospital experience with an extended stay. I'm having a hard time getting my fluids is each day. I haven't made the goal yet. I miss food so much. I miss the smell, taste, texture and so on. I've been pretty miserable over all........but........I'm also down 10pounds since surgery on the 20th. That's what I have to focus on. I can't let myself get down and out about what I miss about food when food is what landed me a spot on the operating table in the first place. I'm determined to take one day at a time. I cannot stay in this bad spot or I will sink. I hope you can find a way to keep looking forward. Best wishes.

[kranky813 477]

VSGANN2014 - Thank you! That was exactly what I needed to hear. It just so hard being this miserable. I do have remember that this is the price I have to pay for the best years of my life. I just want to fast forward to 4 months out.

Camsmom08 - I agree! I have to just keep looking at that scale! I am down 14 lbs since surgery and it feels great to see the scale actually move. I too just miss food so much. It's been my comfort and friend for so long I don't know how to live without it. But I do have to remind myself that it's temporary. This too shall pass.

[Babbs 14,680]

@@VSGAnn2014

Amazing post and so, so perfectly said!

[shortyvel 42]

Wow it's amazing how food is so much more than just fuel for the body. It's like a drug to so many of us. Like you lost your best friend.

[TJBintheOC 104]

It will definitely get better. I promise. Just when you think, I can't take this one more minute, something changes. Wait until the pounds start melting away. You might not feel yourself for awhile. It's ok. This is your time!!! Good luck. ❤️

[Miss Mac 6,261]

I think my taste buds missed flavor more than my new tummy missed food. Maybe I should invent a new line of bariatric Protein drinks starting with spaghetti and meatball flavored!

Some of us were not on Clear liquids as long as you, but your surgeon has his reasons. You will be on full liquids soon. You will think that cream of chicken Soup is the best food ever!

[kranky813 477]

Thank you so much everyone, it really does help to hear the encouraging words and know that this will not last forever. It's so funny that in the moment you feel like it will never end.

I researched for a year before having surgery and thought I new it all. Thought I had all of my bases covered and knew what was around each corner. Right now I have no idea which way is up. I am mourning my best friend - food. I feel like I should be attending a funeral. The funny thing is that I was a smoker prior to WLS and I thought giving that up was bad. Haha that was a piece of cake compared to this. Mmmmm cake, lol. At least I still have my humor.

The one thing I didn't mention in my original post was how this has completely messed with me on a mental note. I am a professional woman in my mid 30s, Married, with 2 children and I am the stable one in our household. This surgery has completely made me a mental case. I cried for 48 hours straight, woke up with anxiety, and felt as if there was this huge weight on my chest because I decided to do this to myself. I honestly felt as if I was drowning. But I am feeling better. Hearing from you lovely people and knowing that the worst is over and that each day is going to get a little better has really helped me. I will say that the buyers remorse is still there but it's not as all consuming as it was. I owe this to you and to my wonderful husband. I can't tell you how grateful I am.

[wantingabetterlife 364]

You can do it! The buyer's remorse will go away and soon you will feel like this is the best thing you could have ever done. It won't feel like that for a while but it will come. Your hormones will probably bounce all over the place in the next couple of months as your weight drops! Hold on and don't let yourself get too down. And please remember....the stalls will come soon too. The first one (the dreaded 3 week stall) will really make you question your decision. It will pass! Follow your program and keep your chin up. We have all been through the same feelings at some point. Rant, rave, yell, question, whatever you need to on here. We know!

[kranky813 477]

Thanks everyone. Another setback today. I was just released from the ER for dehydration and low blood sugar. I am so frustrated right now. I read all of the posts of people who are breezing through recovery and I want to cry even more. All I have done today is try not to puke. It's been horrific. Happy one week out to me.