I don't know about the rest of you, but I've been obese for a long time. I am in my late fifties, and my question is kind of crazy for my age: What is my "style"? I used to have cute clothes, when I was thinner, but I'm much older now. As a heavy person, I've done my best to dress attractively and with style. But three factors have led me to not love the clothes I've worn for the last many years.

First, feeling so bad about myself has taken away my desire to dress well. I guess I've felt that very little I could do made me look really cute or attractive. Even when I was happy and confident with an outfit, I'd always second-guess myself. Or see a dreaded photo or image in a mirror and be able to focus on nothing but the bumps and rolls.

Second, I've always tried to hide and cover up my fat as much as possible: Spanx, nylons under pants (although I mostly stopped that a couple of years ago), three-quarter or long sleeves, nothing too form-fitting, etc. So, while there were clothes out there I would have loved, I didn't wear them because I didn't think they would look good on my body type or I was too-self-conscious.

And third, of course, is the lack of stylish clothes available for heavier women.

I am so looking forward to being able to buy -- and look good in! -- smaller clothes. And emptying out my closet of all the cheap clothes I bought (and, sadly, a few good pieces that will no longer fit). I plan to shop at thrifts and consignment stores during the weight loss period, but once I reach goal, I want to have a smaller wardrobe -- in both senses of the word! Good-quality pieces that will last and that are versatile. But I find that I'm not sure now what my style is. And I don't want to waste a lot of money buying too many things as I figure it out.

I know this won't be a problem for a lot of people, who seem to have been born with a "look" or style. And actually, "problem" is totally the wrong word. I'm really looking forward to being able to express myself and have fun through clothes. But I don't want to clog up my closet with junk purchased on a whim, and I don't want to waste money buying too many things, especially good pieces that I won't end up wearing long-term.

So, I guess I'd like to know if anyone else experienced this, and how you approached this wonderful, brave new world of getting to buy cute clothes and figuring out your own style? How did you go about building a new wardrobe? Did you cut out or Pinterest looks you liked as you were losing weight? Any other tips?

I'm nervous about this, too. I've been obese since my junior year of high school and used to have such a cute style..:and now I'm 30, a work-at-home mom, and pretty much exist in oversize tee shirts, hoodies, and you pants. there's so many things I see that I would LOVE to wear, but I don't feel confident enough to try. I'm hoping that changed as the weight comes off.

It will. I stopped wearing dresses when I saw how much I looked like my fat little grandma in them. Now I wear dresses all the time again because I look good in them. Slender calves, no big belly, no backside that sticks out like a foreign body attached to my lower back. Such a difference when one is thinner.

Skirt length. ..go by what looks best on your body. Skirt below the knees make me look like a frumpy spinster. .2" above the knee is perfect. I also buy "young" clothes but am careful how I style and what I pair them with. I am not trying to look 15 but not 85 either..haha

I'm trying to figure this out as right now. A couple of problems I'm having now that I'm so close to goal:

The last time I was this size was 20 years ago. I am an almost 50 year old woman (well, 48) now. I'm trying really hard as a size 6-8 to resist the urge to buy and wear the clothes meant for women in their 20's and 30's. I mean, some of them are so cute! But I would probably look ridiculous in some of them, lol. But I also want to show off my new figure and not dress like an old woman. I've been going online and researching quite a bit on how to dress my age but still be sexy

Now that I'm pretty darn close to goal, I know now I can finally go out and start my new wardrobe. I have picked and searched my way through clearance racks on my way down. I know I've spent quite a bit of money, too. I'm a Realtor, so I still have to keep a professional wardrobe. I've done all my summer shopping, (some of those clothes are even now too big) but now fall will be upon us and I will need a whole new fall wardrobe. It's getting expensive! But now at least I know I won't be going down much more, so what I buy I keep. I know it's a good problem to have, and I love clothes shopping now, but damn my credit cards have been getting a work out!

Clearance racks, discount stores and consignment stores will be your friend throuout this, and by the time you've hit goal you can hopefully figure out your own style for the more "permanent" purchases.

Babbs you are such a hottie you can pull off anything!!! ????

Just you ladies wait!!!

Skirts and dresses and skinny jeans and boots that fit and heels and cute little tops and more and more and more!!!!

It's so fun. I can shop anywhere and wear so many things. My skirts keep getting shorter and shorter though and I have to laugh about that!

Thrift store shopping is pretty awesome because it's so cheap and that way if you keep losing, no big deal!

Shopping now is so much fun. You will discover your style and it will be so fun doing it!

Here is how I dress now:

Skinny jeans!

Sun dresses!

Sexy little tops!

Whatever the heck I want!!! Haha. Okay this last one is a joke. ????

I get it. I'll be 49 this weekend and spent most of my life in slacks to get comfy shoes (wore an 11 shoe before so there weren't a lot of choices). As a Systems Engineer, I work in a typically younger, male dominated workforce. The gyus live in khaki pants and polos, but I have to strike a balance between "young enough", comfortable enough for physical work some days and professional. I wear a lot more skirts these days! Tall boots in the fall\winter are a wardrobe staple as they are both comfortable and warm. Pointelle pants with tall boots and a cute tunic top also works. As for my personal time, I probably dress younger than I used to! I'm a biker chick, and "edge" is kinda part of my thing, but I try to keep it toned down at least a little! Do I shop at The Buckle... Yup! Am I very careful what I'll buy from there... You bet! You CAN do current and stylish at 50 and over, you just have to pay attention to fit, etc. If it's too sheer, I'll toss a cami under it depending on where I'm headed. I'm single and dating and occasionally take in a club with live music. I will not look like a frump! Neither do I want to look silly! You won't find me in the minidress and sky high heels! You will find me in a current top that flatters my figure, leather jacket, skinny jeans and tall flat boots! You'll figure it out too! Have a GREAT time doing it!

Just you ladies wait!!!

Skirts and dresses and skinny jeans and boots that fit and heels and cute little tops and more and more and more!!!!

It's so fun. I can shop anywhere and wear so many things. My skirts keep getting shorter and shorter though and I have to laugh about that!

Thrift store shopping is pretty awesome because it's so cheap and that way if you keep losing, no big deal!

Shopping now is so much fun. You will discover your style and it will be so fun doing it!

Here is how I dress now:

ImageUploadedByBariatricPal1442421849.459687.jpg

Skinny jeans!

ImageUploadedByBariatricPal1442421873.021304.jpg

Sun dresses!

ImageUploadedByBariatricPal1442421922.963099.jpg

Sexy little tops!

ImageUploadedByBariatricPal1442422011.059115.jpg

Whatever the heck I want!!! Haha. Okay this last one is a joke. ????

You look fabulous! I just took my granddaughter out roller skating last Saturday. It felt so good to move my body and not feel like a lump!

As for more clothes, I received coupons in the mail from Bon-ton for $100 in clothes, shoes and makeup. The orange dress I bought for $11, the black skirt is pleather and has long fringe. Cost me $8.80, also picked up 3 pairs of shoes for $5.95.

I keep getting coupons for $10 off $10, or $30 off $30 for Kmart or Sears. Only condition is that they can't be clearance. So, the rest of the coupons I'm getting underwear and socks for the homeless shelters. My style is still evolving...skinny jeans, wide leg, it's whatever I look in the mirror and think...Dang, look how far you've come.

And "I ain't finished yet"

Just you ladies wait!!!

Skirts and dresses and skinny jeans and boots that fit and heels and cute little tops and more and more and more!!!!

It's so fun. I can shop anywhere and wear so many things. My skirts keep getting shorter and shorter though and I have to laugh about that!

Thrift store shopping is pretty awesome because it's so cheap and that way if you keep losing, no big deal!

Shopping now is so much fun. You will discover your style and it will be so fun doing it!

Here is how I dress now:

ImageUploadedByBariatricPal1442421849.459687.jpg

Skinny jeans!

ImageUploadedByBariatricPal1442421873.021304.jpg

Sun dresses!

ImageUploadedByBariatricPal1442421922.963099.jpg

Sexy little tops!

ImageUploadedByBariatricPal1442422011.059115.jpg

Whatever the heck I want!!! Haha. Okay this last one is a joke.

Not a joke girl! You are wearing that little dress!!!

Just you ladies wait!!!

Skirts and dresses and skinny jeans and boots that fit and heels and cute little tops and more and more and more!!!!

It's so fun. I can shop anywhere and wear so many things. My skirts keep getting shorter and shorter though and I have to laugh about that!

Thrift store shopping is pretty awesome because it's so cheap and that way if you keep losing, no big deal!

Shopping now is so much fun. You will discover your style and it will be so fun doing it!

Here is how I dress now:

ImageUploadedByBariatricPal1442421849.459687.jpg

Skinny jeans!

ImageUploadedByBariatricPal1442421873.021304.jpg

Sun dresses!

ImageUploadedByBariatricPal1442421922.963099.jpg

Sexy little tops!

ImageUploadedByBariatricPal1442422011.059115.jpg

Whatever the heck I want!!! Haha. Okay this last one is a joke.

You look fabulous! I just took my granddaughter out roller skating last Saturday. It felt so good to move my body and not feel like a lump!

As for more clothes, I received coupons in the mail from Bon-ton for $100 in clothes, shoes and makeup. The orange dress I bought for $11, the black skirt is pleather and has long fringe. Cost me $8.80, also picked up 3 pairs of shoes for $5.95.

I keep getting coupons for $10 off $10, or $30 off $30 for Kmart or Sears. Only condition is that they can't be clearance. So, the rest of the coupons I'm getting underwear and socks for the homeless shelters. My style is still evolving...skinny jeans, wide leg, it's whatever I look in the mirror and think...Dang, look how far you've come.

And "I ain't finished yet"

That orange dress is so flattering!!

I can't tell ya'll what a relief it is to be able to shop in any store. It is such a freeing feeling.

I'm a late arrival to the topic, so there isn't much I can add. If it hasn't already been said, an online search for things like "how to dress at age 50" will get lots of things to read. Just before I logged in, I saw a cool slide show at Yahoo on what to stop wearing at various ages. I tried to find it again to include a link here, but no luck.

The subject of "what do I like and what suits me now" is confusing and covers more territory than wardrobe. My WLS NP introduced me a few years ago to "The Weight Loss Surgery Coping Companion: A Practical Guide for Coping with Post-Surgery Emotions," by Tanie Miller Kabala, Ph.D. a psychologist who works with many WLS people and does pre-surgery psych evals. It's an easy book to read and use, a well-guided workbook for sorting out the changes, emotional and otherwise, as they come along. The chapter that really stood out for me is "How to Cope with Identity Confusion," which is about the topic here. Rather than writing directly in the book, I think a separate notebook is in order so that the book itself can be reused whenever helpful. The separate notebook also becomes a journal.

[Full disclosure: Thinking that the book was worthwhile, I requested a review copy from Dr. Kabala so that people at my semi-annual clothing exchange could look it over. I have no financial interest or other connection to the book.]

Edited November 19, 201510 yr by WLSResources/ClothingExch

I'm another one in her 50s who has never been able to explore her style due to the dearth of reasonably priced stylish (is that an oxymoron?) plus sizes. We should start a group.

I'm another one in her 50s who has never been able to explore her style due to the dearth of reasonably priced stylish (is that an oxymoron?) plus sizes. We should start a group.

Just know that it will take some time for you to know what looks good and what doesn't. You will buy things just because they fit. It's how we used to shop. Slowly but surely you will realize that if you don't buy something at one store, you can try ten more. The world opens up to you once you are out of women's sizes. I truly bought and wore several items once and not again. I looked at some of the outfits I bought once I had them home and just shook my head sadly not knowing what had come over me. There's going to be alot of mistakes but if you learn from them, they will be learning experiences. Look at this as a fun thing...not a dreaded task to get through. At some point you will feel this way but till you do, just fake it till you make it!

A tip for everyone from my Fashionista friend (who was an Editor at Elle): Bootcut jeans are in, skinnies are out.

Maybe you can talk your friend into guest posting on this topic for us!

My Inner Surfer Girl is looking forward to buying real surf gear and bathing suits.

I just ordered an O'Neil rashguard to swim in and it was an XL. Its a tad tight but that is ok for a rashguard to wear over my bathing suit to keep my arms and shoulders warm. I haven't been able to wear "real" clothes in decades so this is a big deal for me.

I also ordered another rashguard in L for future wear because I thought the pattern was cool.

Age has nothing to do with it..when you are slim you can shop wherever you want...you can choose designer or contemporary...you can even live in sweats...your choice.....I will be at Zara as soon as I can do it...yes my 50+ old ass intends to rock the casbah !!!:-)

At 70 years old I'm turning into a leather and dog collar kind of girl.

Of course, I'd prefer that the leather be Armani and the dog collar be Hermes.

This is one of the parts of wls & losing weight that I'm most excited about. I have this picture of me and my style in my head that doesn't translate with what is easily accessible to someone my size.