Has anyone not told a single person about having surgery? I mean not a soul!! No parents, friends, or coworkers. I'm single so no husband or boyfriend to tell. I am a little worried about negative remarks but that's not the reason I'm not telling anyone. There are only 2 people that work with me here and one is a guy and the other is my skinny Japanese boss, so I don't really have the urge to tell them.

I do love my boss like a mom but I think she wouldn't really understand my situation. And of course there's the option to tell my actual parents, but my dad absolutely would not understand nor approve of me getting surgery and my mom, I think, wouldn't understand either. At least right now. She would say I'm taking the easy way out and I should be saving my money, etc.

I do plan on telling my mom first maybe after a year and then she can decide if she wants to tell my dad.

Although I do have friends no one is really close enough for me to tell except one or two people. But I'm not even sure if I want to say anything.

I just want to see if I'm alone in not telling anyone.

I haven't told one person!

I haven't told one person!

Me either! Not a living soul. It's almost empowering to me. I'm three months post op. Have you had your surgery as yet?

Yes, surgery was on 10/25. Doing fine. I use these boards for my moral support!

Yes, surgery was on 10/25. Doing fine. I use these boards for my moral support!

Yes, exactly!

I told just a few close to me, my mom, husband, 4 friends my family is 100% supportive out of my friends 2 were positive and supportive and 2 were scared/negative but claimed to support me. But did not want me to do it. Both skinny all their lives have never dealt with being overweight more than 15lbs at the most!

I did not tell my family because I do not think they would have supported me. Do what you feel is best.

Agree do this for you!!! When I was being taken for surgery literally being pushed on my gurney the nurse said this is for you girl, you'll be great. So there are lots of positives but the negative will hit ya the hardest and you don't need that! Good luck and prayers!!!

You are not alone @@Ky89 I have not, nor do I plan to tell anyone. The only person that knows anything is my 23 year old daughter, and that's because she lives with me, and she is 1000% behind my decision.

My reason for not telling anyone is simply that I feel it is a very personal matter, and I'm not interested in sharing my personal business with anyone. My boss at work will know that I'm having surgery, but has no idea what its for, and that's all they need to know.

You do whatever is comfortable for you. This is your life, your body, and your decision. Quite frankly I couldn't care less what anyone else thinks or feels about my decision, so their opinions, questions, and attitudes are not welcomed or warranted.

Best wishes to you on this journey my dear!

Has anyone not told a single person about having surgery? I mean not a soul!! No parents, friends, or coworkers. I'm single so no husband or boyfriend to tell. I am a little worried about negative remarks but that's not the reason I'm not telling anyone. There are only 2 people that work with me here and one is a guy and the other is my skinny Japanese boss, so I don't really have the urge to tell them.

I do love my boss like a mom but I think she wouldn't really understand my situation. And of course there's the option to tell my actual parents, but my dad absolutely would not understand nor approve of me getting surgery and my mom, I think, wouldn't understand either. At least right now. She would say I'm taking the easy way out and I should be saving my money, etc.

I do plan on telling my mom first maybe after a year and then she can decide if she wants to tell my dad.

Although I do have friends no one is really close enough for me to tell except one or two people. But I'm not even sure if I want to say anything.

I just want to see if I'm alone in not telling anyone.

I told only one person; my boyfriend and only because we dine out so much that he'd know something was different. Other than that, not a single soul at the office nor anyone in my rather large family. Health is very private and it is your discretion to share your info or not. I do; however encourage you to let at least one trustworthy person in; you'll need the help and support afterwards. I am going on 3 weeks post op and feeling amazing!!

Best of luck to you on your journey!!!!

I had no choice but to tell my mother. She's one of my biggest cheerleaders and always has been. I moved back home a couple of years ago to help out because my dad has cancer. Even with everything that's going on with my dad and another close family member, my mother has been 100% supportive regardless of her own worries. My couple of my siblings live with me and they have no idea what's going on, and I'm not telling them. They would tell everyone, and I don't want that to happen. I have a couple of friends that know, and three aunts that know because my mom told her sisters. They can keep secrets. No one else will know. I want to surprise everyone at my great-aunt's birthday party in February. If my circumstances were different, I wouldn't have told anyone.

I told only one person; my boyfriend and only because we dine out so much that he'd know something was different. Other than that, not a single soul at the office nor anyone in my rather large family. Health is very private and it is your discretion to share your info or not. I do; however encourage you to let at least one trustworthy person in; you'll need the help and support afterwards. I am going on 3 weeks post op and feeling amazing!!

Best of luck to you on your journey!!!!

I would love to have someone there for support but trying to find the right person is definitely hard. There's no one in Japan that I would even think about bringing this topic up to, but there's maybe one friend stateside I think would be supportive, but I'm still debating in that.

Wow congrats on your post op success!!

I'm not telling my family - too much stress there. My mom just let me know that she is coming into to town the day I fly to San Diego. I told her that I'm going to be out of town. Her typical guilt tripping then ensued. Instead of feeling bad, I just smiled. I'm taking control of my life and my weight with great tools - VSG, counselling, surrounding myself with supportive, non-judgmental people, a treadmill desk where I can walk, walk, walk for hours instead of sitting, trying out great recipes from pinterest, journalling and other creative outlets. When and if I'm ready, I'll let her know. For now, I just feel like I need to keep this to myself as a way to protect myself, stregthen my resolve.

I told my bf finally. He is going with me. When I told him, we talked about how he could be supportive without either of us feeling like he had to be my weight manager / food cop. I told my boss that I'm having surgery. Thanks to FLMA - no questions asked other than am I okay.

Pre-surgery, I wouldn't have told anyone if it were possible. But I had to explain why I wouldn't be able to come to my parent's house on my bi-weekly visits. Plus I had tell my best friend, I had to have a ride home after being released - the hospital was 2 hours away.

Now I don't have a problem telling anyone that asks if I've had surgery. But I don't bring it up unless directly asked. I don't volunteer to tell anyone otherwise.

Edited November 2, 201411 yr by joatsaint

I told only 2 people; my mother who has always been on my side(and is the guardian of my child in the event of my death) and one girlfriend who I knew I could trust not to tell a soul. Of course, my therapist knows but I've been working on the psychological and emotional issues around food/overeating with her for months. The odd part, is that I didn't tell my 2 best friends because they are both big mouths and I'm sure our entire social circle, which is huge, would know within hours.

So, just 2 people in personal life know I was sleeved. I am not a super private person, except when it comes down to my health.

I think we all have the right to decide what we share and with whom; whatever the subject matter.

I only told my husband. Luckily I did have a hernia repair and gal bladder removed so I had another reason to tell others. people have asked about my weight loss, so be prepared for that. Told them i have been working out everyday and no sugar, nothing white. Kinda a half truth.

Do what you feel comfortable with. It is your body and your life.