Your response to: "but you aren't 'THAT' big!"

[AuriP 420]

I've told plenty of people about my decision. I'm a revision patient so many knew that the lap band didn't work for me. I haven't had one negative comment towards me so far, I've had many say they would never, ever get it done, one who is bigger than I. I own it, I need it. My mom has struggled with her weight the majority of her life, she is diabetic, has had a heart attack at 46, has had a stroke at 34. I inherited all those pre existing conditions from her. My maternal grandmother's family have died young, she died. There was 7 of them and now there are 3 left. All with some form of pre existing conditions that my mother has. I'm not playing around with my health, I'm already pre diabetic (before surgery), my knees were hurting, my legs were becoming swollen, I'm not even 30 yet, still have 6 months to go. I have 3 kids that I want to enjoy to the fullest, I want to be able to not be tired from playing with them. I want them to lead a healthy life so that they may prevent some of the conditions my mother has had to endure. I don't care what anyone says, this is not their body or their life, this is mine.

[labwalker 1,177]

I went to a gym 5 days a week, and hired a personal trainer for sixteen weeks long before I ever considered surgery and lost maybe the same 10 lbs over and over. So it was not for lack of trying. The diabetes and PCOS just made losing weight incredibly difficult. This drives me nuts. Oh, just drink more Water and workout more. And of course, put the fork down. Ugh.

I started taking long walks about 14 years ago, with my first lab. We'd walk for two or three hours a day... I was able to lose 70 lbs over the summer, but when the snows came the weight came back on. Rinse, wash, repeat. The lab was doing a lot better with her health and weight than I was, LOL. At least that effort got my cholesterol well under control, along with an effort to eat a lot healthier. But, once I had the WLS, the weight came off, and stayed off. I may go through periods where I cheat a bit, or miss going to the gym, but I don't gain. And when get back on track, I start losing again. I will reach my goal, and I will live to see it. I had my doubts before WLS.

I told very few folks that I was considering the WLS, except for several folks that I knew had WLS. My wife was nervous about it, but once I made the decision to follow through, she had a gastric sleeve done several months after my gastric band. We're both very happy with results. To be honest, I am glad I didn't go public. I've felt the negative vibes, and when folks ask if I've lost weight, I honestly tell them that I hit the gym for one hour, at least 6 or 7 days a week.

[swimbikerun 1,038]

Do you think the negative vibes stem from jealousy or derision? I want to know why WLS should have a stigma with it? Why not diabetics or people with heart trouble who are extremely overweight, no one denigrates them for taking insulin or high blood pressure pills do they?

Does any one carp on depressed or bipolar people for taking medications or doing things to get healthy? Or is it they don't want to admit that the studies are true in that diet and exercise don't work after needing to lose 5-15 pounds?

if they think that everyone can pull themselves up by their bootstraps, how many examples can they point out in THEIR life that they did it all by themselves?

[Steviefan1 126]

Hmmmm.....perhaps they would rather you wait for surgery until you become "that big" (say, 350-450+) and then you could lose several hundred pounds instead of 100 or so. Then, you could have REALLY sagging skin, and have to get THAT removed like so many do. Also, you could suffer longer with health issues and aches and pains. Sounds good, huh?

[Steffyp 63]

I got that too. I was 214lbs and 5 foot 1. Not cute, but my weight was distributed all over and unless I told her what I weighed you wouldn't guess it. I told a co-worker I was getting the lap band and got " Oh don't do that, you don't need it". My response was, well I'm tired of not feeling good, low energy and ongoing reflux. furthermore, this is a personal decision and I have already made it!. I have been banded now for over a year with no regrets. Well,maybe one. I wish I had done it sooner!! After that episode I only told my immediate family and no one else. They were very supportive.

[Noragretz 28]

For some strange reason people believe you have to be absolutely HUGE to qualify for surgery. I might say that too... Because I want to look more like you!

Notice how those comments come from skinny peeps?

Anyways I only told a select few people. Lol only 1 of my 2 children know. 20 yr old daughter knows, 12 yr old son just thinks I'm on a diet AGAIN.

[MisforMimi 760]

Do you think the negative vibes stem from jealousy or derision? I want to know why WLS should have a stigma with it? Why not diabetics or people with heart trouble who are extremely overweight, no one denigrates them for taking insulin or high blood pressure pills do they?

Does any one carp on depressed or bipolar people for taking medications or doing things to get healthy? Or is it they don't want to admit that the studies are true in that diet and exercise don't work after needing to lose 5-15 pounds?

if they think that everyone can pull themselves up by their bootstraps, how many examples can they point out in THEIR life that they did it all by themselves?

I've learned that EVERYONE, I MEAN EVERYONE wants to loose weight, even naturally skinny people. The normies, I call them, the ones who can happily eat plain lettuce with lemon slices and 3 ounces of dried up chicken breast for every meal. My brother is one. I do think there is an element of jealously involved like nobody can get a break on losing of maintaining weight if they didn't. And yes they think WLS is a break!

A co-worker of mine is bipolar and she's having electroshock treatment and ppl are like great whatever works! The fear and hatred of the obese is so insidious and subversive in our culture it's unreal.

[OnePhatWhoDat 54]

I got major side-eye from folks at the information seminar, because, I guess they were wondering just what the heck I was doing there. I started out at 5'2", 215 pounds. My BMI was 39.3. When I was cleared for surgery, I went to have my labs, ultrasound, chest X-Ray done. The lab techs looked at my paperwork and exclaimed, "Dr. Woodman?!?!" Then they gave me that up and down look, you know, that look. "He must be doing a study or something?" I told them no, and was getting the gastric sleeve on October 15. "Oh..." Up and down look again. Ha! Ha! Been sleeved for three days. So far, so good.

[swimbikerun 1,038]

Fear and hatred is right.

I think it is that and the fact of discrimination on looks. How many passes are given to those who physically look good compared to those who don't, no matter how good they are? Remember Marla Hooch in A League of Their Own?

How good she was, yet because she wasn't Miss Georgia, she was not considered until the other women stood up against the bigotry.

[swimbikerun 1,038]

That is nuts.

Someone wants to get healthy and doctors look at them wrong. I'm sorry, but that is outrageous. What do they care? They'll miss out on $$$ because you are healthier and don't put $$ in their pockets any longer?

I've seen support groups that aren't support except for a certain line of thought. It seems bariatric surgery must only be for a few, by the way some doctors act.

I got major side-eye from folks at the information seminar, because, I guess they were wondering just what the heck I was doing there. I started out at 5'2", 215 pounds. My BMI was 39.3. When I was cleared for surgery, I went to have my labs, ultrasound, chest X-Ray done. The lab techs looked at my paperwork and exclaimed, "Dr. Woodman?!?!" Then they gave me that up and down look, you know, that look. "He must be doing a study or something?" I told them no, and was getting the gastric sleeve on October 15. "Oh..." Up and down look again. Ha! Ha! Been sleeved for three days. So far, so good.

[robga999 129]

this all sounds so familiar to me!i went thru the same thing not to bad tho when I told people my orthopedic told me do what you have to because if you don't you will need a double knee replacement in 5 yrs.on te other hand my hubby is also getting the surgery in a couple of weeks.and his family are all heffers!!!of course he at 44yrs old is on meds for blood pressue and cholestral.mentime the mother eho is 400lbs plus and the sister looks like her twin telling hime now,oh your not that big and your blood preesure is normal and chlostrol is low!!im screaming of course it is because he is on meds you idiots!!are they jealous?noppe,they just have to against what anyone including doctors tell him he should do this.ps his other sister is a PA and thinks he shouldn't be on any meds!!

[Kandis SupaStar Hill 39]

@@swimbikerun I think it might be a mixture but I know depending on the person it can be a bit of derision. I remember a friend making the comment about another friend who's getting the surgery and it was full of ridicule. She basically said it wasn't fair that she was able to eat herself into a death chamber, (meaning her body), then get a free pass to get out of it without ever putting any thought into her weight before. Besides calling her body a "death chamber," there was a few things wrong with her statement. First, you never know what someone thinks about the condition of their body skinny or obese, so to say she just simply got a "free pass," meaning her insurance would cover her irresponsibility, is quite ridiculous to say the least.

I do think that people who don't understand the WLS is a tool feel a little jealously because they're under the assumption that you never have to go the gym, be cognizant of what you eat ever again, while they're running for their lives on a treadmill. It's just a stigma that comes with WLS because how often do people get educated on the topic, aside from the people who are actually going through it?

[ErinMarie 186]

"Clearly you've never seen me naked."

[Rogofulm 2,440]

All of us who have heard (or felt) the F-word know that for some unfathomable reason, the last "acceptable" form of discrimination is against the overweight. How many times have you heard a radio talk show personality say something like, "I'll give that fat bastard a piece of my mind"? And how many TV shows and movies still make fun of the chubby character who is written to be a bumbling buffoon? Why do they still get away with it? Why doesn't the FCC come down on that subject just as hard as it does on the defamation of every other group? Because being overweight is a choice and not a condition? How about ignorance? Now THAT'S a choice! The prejudices are deeply ingrained and constantly reinforced by society and the media. We are weak, otherwise we'd be able to lose weight and keep it off through diet and exercise, right? Huh? Then why are diet products a multi-billion dollar industry? It's not that easy! Those of us who have made the WLS decision have come to recognize that fact, because we've all tried the old way -- over and over and over again. Some of us have started a new diet every stinkin' Monday morning for most of our lives! The point is that people who don't face this issue (and many who do) can't understand the constant battles we have faced in trying to get control of our bodies and minds. And this is the tool we are turning to as our best hope of turning our lives around permanently. So don't presume to tell me what I do, or do not need to do with my body until you've walked a thousand miles in my skin! And the next time someone tells you that you don't need weight loss surgery, gently tell them, "Fat Off".

[Jacqbult 112]

loser2014, on 12 Oct 2014 - 20:08, said:

One of the most eye-opening moments for me was when no one I told that I was having WLS said I was not big enough for the surgery. I knew I was overweight at 5'7" 260 pounds, but I guess see the old skinnier me when I look in the mirror. It was a revelation that not a single person tried to talk me out of it (not that they would have been successful).

SAME HERE!! That was a real eye opener for me too. I think I also don't see my weight when I look !in the mirror. Believe me I KNOW I am overweight but I don't think I have allowed myself to see the true reflection staring back at me. I know in a year from now when I see a picture of how I am now I will be like "holy Sh*T I didn't realize I was THAT big