How you see yourself

[rhonda2006 64]

Hello i am having a bit of a problem.i am 11 months post of gastric sleeve. I started at 338 pounds. Now I am 149 pounds. Size 24-26 to now a loose size 10. My problem is that I still see myself as fat. I know I've come a long way and feel really good about that, but does it get better the way you are yourself. I was talking to a girl at work yesterday and asked her why she wouldn't keep her shirt in she said because I'm fat, I told her I was far too and I keep mine in she looked at my like I was crazy and said your not fat. It's been a really long time since I was not fat

[rhonda2006 64]

This is me a few weeks ago, not so good a picture but don't have many

[Mocha2871 182]

I think that you have come a long way and its hard to see yourself in a new light. I have lost a nice amount of weight but I look at myself as the same person I was before the surgery. Its really hard but you have to get a new way of thinking about yourself and how you see yourself. Everyone sees you differently and it should help you see the great strides you have made. I do understand how you feel because I look in the mirror and dont see anything different. I dont know what size I really wear because I wear so many different brands that the sizes vary so its really hard but you have to know that you look great and you are a winner!!!!!!!!

[katesuccess 990]

Rhonda2006 you look great! But I know what you mean about still seeing your self and thinking of yourself as the way you were. Are you still wearing the same type of clothes and colors? Sometimes we are so accustomed to being self-conscious about being bed we forget that we adopted that wardrobe as part of hiding ourselves or being less noticeable. Get to a store with a good friend who has a fun sense of style and who loves you enough to be gentle--even thrift stores or Goodwell will have some things that will be fun to try on and text out a new look for some more energizing or flattering colors. I am amazed at how much difference I feel when I wear something with a lighter color tone or some life in it, rather than my usual navy blue, black, and gray wardrobe. I actually find myself thinking of myself differently and feeling myself (and the energy) in more positive realistic ways. It isn't so much the new clothes or the new lipstick that makes this so, but the experience of looking at your cell with a more positive praising eye, or with the help of someone else's vision of how you now look.

On a more internal level, it's always good if we ask ourselves if that old body image is somehow serving another purpose for us. Doesn't help me to stay an introvert, when some of that extrovert energy will mean I have more notice or more is expected of me socially, for example. Or if I see myself as more attractive, and others do too, will it mean unwanted attention, or attention I have not wanted to deal with. Perhaps now is a good time to talk with someone about what purpose the old body served. It's part of what I am doing myself right now, and some of it is wonderfully refreshing and some of it is actually pretty hard to sort through, but all of it to a good end.

Congratulations on all of your hard work, your amazing weight-loss, and sorting through where you are right now. And did you manage all of this while being the mother of two small children? Wow! You rock!

[JanetPRN 496]

This is a really good question, and I am not sure how to answer. When I get dressed , I pick out outfits from my closet that are figure flattering and accentuate my new size ( loose size 10 also). I still have no idea when I go shopping for new clothes though. I pick up a size 10 dress and think " put that down, its too small" when in fact it does/should fit. Brains are a crazy thing.

[rhonda2006 64]

Thanks for the replies everyone. I have bought myself a few new clothes lately and trying to get pretty brighter colors instead of dark dull colors. I do still pick up clothes and say I'm going to try this on even though I know it's not going to for and then to my surprise it does fit. I bought myself a swimsuit too with a skirt to cover my thighs. Yes my precious babies will be 3 on October plus I work full time as a restaurant manager. It hasn't been easy at times. I guess it just takes time to see ourselves in a different light.

[livvsmum 2,368]

That has been the hardest thing for me. It seems the smaller I get the more "fat" I feel. It is a strange thing because when I was morbidly obese I didn't feel "that" large and when I saw pictures I was sometimes taken aback at how large I actually was. I am actually going to my first appointment this week with a therapist to start to work through these and some other "food" issues that I have. Good luck to you. You have done an amazing job so far and I'm sure that you will continue to get used to your new body.

[bikrchk 1,313]

I'm 8 months post op and 85 pounds down. 5 to go to my goal, 15 to my stretch goal. Still losing well, so I may actually make the stretch, (135 pounds, I'm 5'6"). I'm in a size 6 now easily. Most days I see a thin'ish person staring back at me. Not a size 6, but a healthy 8 or 10 and she looks pretty good to me! I see my friends who are an 8-10 and can't believe I'm smaller, and that the clothes I borrowed 2 months ago are too big for me now. Some days I feel like I look outright chunky. Body image is a strange chicken for sure!