Failure

[Bigmommatojacob 54]

Okay starts my fifth week and I am so nervous. I have started eating and am so afraid of failure. I have failed for the last thirty years at dieting and am scared I will fail at surgery. I want to be a loser for once. I follow the plan and eat four bites and full. Just so scared because. Lathing else has worked.

[Nicolanz 1,484]

Know that failure IS an option even with weight loss surgery. You have to keep your eyes on the prize your 5th week, 5th month, and 5th year! Start good eating habits now, choosing the right foods and stay away from grazing. Now is your do-over, treat it as your second chance at life. I can't stress enough how easy it is to fall back to old habits. Don't let that be you! You got this!

[Teachamy 1,042]

Just follow the plan--you can do this. Stay off the scale--weigh no more than once a week. If you have questions, ask, ask, ask! See you doctor and nutritionist. Keep all appointments. Log all food and drink. You won't fail this time.

[McButterpants 2,846]

Your fear is perfectly normal - we have all failed before, multiple times. A lot of us think that this, too, will fail.

Here's what I know at 6 months out....I can eat lots of foods. I have a sleeve of steel, I have yet to find a food that bothers me. I can eat lots and lots of carbs and feel very little restriction (this happened just 2 weeks ago with yogurt pretzels). Your sleeve doesn't stop you from eating the bad foods, it stops you from eating large quantities of bad food.< /p>

I just had to start tracking my intake again because I ALLOWED those old habits back in my life in the past 8 weeks. My weight loss slowed to a crawl and I didn't know why until the first day I started logging my food again. I also realized I started eating too fast again. I need to be more disciplined, I need to track and I need to make good decisions. I am responsible for feeding my body Protein rich and healthy foods. My sleeve will stop me when it's time.

Best of luck to you!

[MetroDetroitChic 86]

I had a rough day too. Broke down and bought donut holes. (very very bad...) first day this happened to me. I am usually really obedient. But I did log my food (all 630 calories of the donut holes... Sheesh), and reflected on what I did wrong. I guess in the end I'm grateful that the sleeve stopped me from turning my 630 calorie mistake into the pre-surgical 2000 calorie mistake.

Crappy day. Definitely a "failure". And I suppose it won't be the last.

So I take each day in stride and generally do my best. If I thought about how I was going to stop from "failing" again for the rest if time, I'd go nuts. But you know what? I'm pretty sure I'll be good tomorrow. And tomorrow is something I can control.

Hang in there...!

Edited May 23, 2014 by MetroDetroitChic

[Improvingme 18]

I had a rough day too. Broke down and bought donut holes. (very very bad...) first day this happened to me. I am usually really obedient. But I did log my food (all 630 calories of the donut holes... Sheesh), and reflected on what I did wrong. I guess in the end I'm grateful that the sleeve stopped me from turning my 630 calorie mistake into the pre-surgical 2000 calorie mistake. <br><br> Crappy day. Definitely a "failure". And I suppose it won't be the last. <br><br> So I take each day in stride and generally do my best. If I thought about how I was going to stop from "failing" again for the rest if time, I'd go nuts. But you know what? I'm pretty sure I'll be good tomorrow. And tomorrow is something I can control. <br><br> Hang in there...!

I so love your honesty. This is a battle and it's not easy. All we can do is take it one day at a time. Hang in there!!!! :-)

[AR40 88]

I'm right there with you. Had an argument with my sister and before I knew it I had taken a huge bite of Choc cake ! Why did I do that, I don't even like sweets. I'm still working on better ways to deal with stuff.

[DeniseNCC1701 306]

Some very powerful stuff is being said here. Thank you to everyone who responded to the OP. Two phrases caught my attention, and I've put them in a text file that I put on my desktop for frequent reference:

@@McButterpants : Your sleeve doesn't stop you from eating the bad foods, it stops you from eating large quantities of bad food.

@@MetroDetroitChic : I'm pretty sure I'll be good tomorrow. And tomorrow is something I can control.

Wow. WOW.

I'm three months out, and working hard to keep the clarity that I'm feeling these days. At the same time, I try to keep a realistic awareness that this road is not a straight line from A to B, but is a road full of diversions and distractions, highs and lows, and everything in between. If I can venture forward making focused and positive course corrections along the way, I'm going to be just fine. The key is not straying too far.

@@Bigmommatojacob : We are all afraid of failing at this. And no matter how far along you are, that fear is always there. Or it should be. Think of it as a way of keeping us in check, a way of keeping our eyes on that road, lest we stray to far. I think real change cannot exist without the presence of fear. And in that respect, it can be one of the most powerful tools of all.

Be well…

Edited May 23, 2014 by DeniseNCC1701

[McButterpants 2,846]

Another thought...we are human, by that very definition, we will fail from time to time. It's how we handle that failure that will define our success.

If you fail one day and say, eat a bunch of donut holes or a bad of yogurt pretzels or insert "bad food" here, that's not catastrophic. The next day you need to "behave yourself" and tighten things up. If you allow that failure that one day become two days, which becomes three days and so on until you finally give up, then I think failure is outcome.

I have had to give up on my "all or nothing" way of thinking - I'm not perfect and I need to say Good Enough sometimes. This was the best I could do today and move on.

I have said to a couple of sleevers on this site who were lamenting about screwing up - "What would you do if a friend said they did the same thing? You would tell them it's OK that tomorrow is another day" YOu would be kind to them. Why can't we do the same thing to ourselves?

Have a great day everyone! Keep on sleevin' on!

[Oregondaisy 2,019]

If you allow yourself to eat goodies all the time, candy, Cookies, etc, it will be hard to lose. those things are allowed in limited amounts, special occasions, etc.

If you follow the plan of Protein first, then veggies, limit your fruit, and watch your carb intake, you can't help but lose. Also get in some kind of exercise, and drink losts of Water.

[AliciaRenee84 3]

Thank you, thank you, thank you for posting this!

I am 3 and a half post op, and I start regular food next week, and I am terrified to death. My weight loss has ceased to exist these past two weeks, and I'm very very discouraged. I've even gained a few pounds. But I have to get ahold of myself and tell myself this is just a hiccup, and tomorrow is a new day. I have had a very very very VERY hard time letting go of carbs, because I LOVE white Pasta, bread, tortillas, everything that's bad for you..... I love. And I'm not going to lie, I still struggle with it. Even though my new stomach doesn't and will not tolerate it, it's still a mental game that I'm struggling to win, and I'm praying in time, I will win. I'm doing research on what to eat and what not to eat, but there are so many hidden bad things that it's hard (for me at least) to know of what I'm about to eat is good or bad??

Hang in there girl. I'm right there with you!

[AliciaRenee84 3]

Thank you, thank you, thank you for posting this! <br><br> I am 3 and a half weeks post op, and I start regular food next week, and I am terrified to death. My weight loss has ceased to exist these past two weeks, and I'm very very discouraged. I've even gained a few pounds. But I have to get ahold of myself and tell myself this is just a hiccup, and tomorrow is a new day. I have had a very very very VERY hard time letting go of carbs, because I LOVE white Pasta, bread, tortillas, everything that's bad for you..... I love. And I'm not going to lie, I still struggle with it. Even though my new stomach doesn't and will not tolerate it, it's still a mental game that I'm struggling to win, and I'm praying in time, I will win. I'm doing research on what to eat and what not to eat, but there are so many hidden bad things that it's hard (for me at least) to know of what I'm about to eat is good or bad?? <br><br> Hang in there girl. I'm right there with you!

[LilMissDiva Irene 3,280]

@@Bigmommatojacob You should only fear failure if you already plan to quit.

[AliciaRenee84 3]

@@Bigmommatojacob You should only fear failure if you already plan to quit.

I like that!

[LookatmeNow34 25]

Knowing is half the battle....Its a daily struggle and sadly Im my own worst enemy.I can not fail at my life...This is my life