Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Discouraged and Heartbroken.



Recommended Posts

Are hospice care well-managing his pain and/or anxiety? Minimizing his suffering should be the primary focus.

And again, SO MANY hugs to you. I know this is absolutely grueling and so constantly, exquisitely painful. You will get through it, cry all you need to, and be super gentle with yourself. Try to get as much sleep as you can as well. Forget about anything else, let your focus go where it needs to. <3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Lisa

Did they give him a round of IV albumin too?

Yes he gets this every two weeks.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

At least he's getting some half way decent care. I'm so very glad for that. How are you doing? Are you ok?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Are hospice care well-managing his pain and/or anxiety? Minimizing his suffering should be the primary focus.

And again, SO MANY hugs to you. I know this is absolutely grueling and so constantly, exquisitely painful. You will get through it, cry all you need to, and be super gentle with yourself. Try to get as much sleep as you can as well. Forget about anything else, let your focus go where it needs to. <3

His pain is managed well. I don't have him on hospice as I a his sole caregiver. I know there are mixed feelings about this so I won't really get into it. I don't like the hospice care here and Im not willing to give up his albumin infusion which he can't get on hospice. It makes him feel better so we continue to do this every two weeks. I would also have to give up care of our primary doctor and have hospice Dr's take over. Not willing to do that either. I think he deserves everything I can do so I will continue to do so if I can. Thanks for all of your support guys.. I appreciate it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Lisa I don't know what I would do in your situation. I only know that what I see shows someone who is very giving, very loving, and trying to do the best they can think of through an extremely stressful, upsetting, and tiring situation.

My prayers and love to you both. I wish that everyone had a strong commitment like you both do.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Dear @@Lisa's Hope, I'm praying for you, your husband and for your family in this difficult time. I won't try to give you advice on how to get back on track. I went through 3 losses in 10 months and it is extremely difficult to overcome something like this. I couldn't even imagine how awful this is for you. Take care of yourself in this time, and if you need someone to chat with I'm here. Hugs!

I would love any advice you could give me. I need to get back on track. I'm so down on myself and I know that if I don't do something, I will get back over 200. The weight will be here when he is gone and I know this is a hard battle. I'm so distraught!! UGH.. why can't I be strong enough to not let this happen again! I'm losing in everything.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I personally went to seek out professional help. It is NOT easy to overcome losing loved ones, especially more than one or in your case your best friend and lover in this world. I cannot imagine...

I went to see a psychiatrist as well as a therapist who helped me deal with the issue of grief and losing loved ones. I had about 4 sessions before I started to feel well enough that I didn't need to go back, but I do have her information should I need to see her at any time. I was very helpful. The fact is if our brains aren't in the right place we will not be able to function in the capacity that is necessary for weight loss and/or maintenance.

That is my advice at this time. Go talk to someone, get some help through this awful time in your life. Go as long and as often as you need to. In the mean time I will pray for your strength and that someday all you will need are the good memories to get through each day.

:(

Dear @@Lisa's Hope, I'm praying for you, your husband and for your family in this difficult time. I won't try to give you advice on how to get back on track. I went through 3 losses in 10 months and it is extremely difficult to overcome something like this. I couldn't even imagine how awful this is for you. Take care of yourself in this time, and if you need someone to chat with I'm here. Hugs!

I would love any advice you could give me. I need to get back on track. I'm so down on myself and I know that if I don't do something, I will get back over 200. The weight will be here when he is gone and I know this is a hard battle. I'm so distraught!! UGH.. why can't I be strong enough to not let this happen again! I'm losing in everything.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I agree with Irene. I saw a therapist for quite some time, off and on, after going through this. I also went on anti-depressants and anti-anxiety meds for a long time (and then again later with a bit of PTSD going on). It's nothing to trifle with -- it's truly the hardest thing ever, in my opinion.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I should add, eventually the bittersweet memories became more prominent than the experience I had lived through -- and sadness remains, but life goes on. And your heart goes on. Truly.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am sure that if I was going through what you are going through I would be walking into walls and sobbing at all times....I am so sorry for your troubles. Cancer is a horrible enemy and it is so unfair for anyone to suffer so much....

Please look after yourself.. Not just for you but for your soul mate as well.. If the dark night is when you slip up chose something else to do instead of sitting there alone...Take a hot bath and or maybe read a book...I don't know. All I know is adding to your pain is way to much right now.....

Do the best you can for both of you...Once again please except my best wishes in this time of hardship!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I personally went to seek out professional help. It is NOT easy to overcome losing loved ones, especially more than one or in your case your best friend and lover in this world. I cannot imagine...

I went to see a psychiatrist as well as a therapist who helped me deal with the issue of grief and losing loved ones. I had about 4 sessions before I started to feel well enough that I didn't need to go back, but I do have her information should I need to see her at any time. I was very helpful. The fact is if our brains aren't in the right place we will not be able to function in the capacity that is necessary for weight loss and/or maintenance.

That is my advice at this time. Go talk to someone, get some help through this awful time in your life. Go as long and as often as you need to. In the mean time I will pray for your strength and that someday all you will need are the good memories to get through each day.

:(

Dear @@Lisa's Hope, I'm praying for you, your husband and for your family in this difficult time. I won't try to give you advice on how to get back on track. I went through 3 losses in 10 months and it is extremely difficult to overcome something like this. I couldn't even imagine how awful this is for you. Take care of yourself in this time, and if you need someone to chat with I'm here. Hugs!

I would love any advice you could give me. I need to get back on track. I'm so down on myself and I know that if I don't do something, I will get back over 200. The weight will be here when he is gone and I know this is a hard battle. I'm so distraught!! UGH.. why can't I be strong enough to not let this happen again! I'm losing in everything.
Thank you. I've already lost my parents and several other people in my life so I'm no stranger to grief. I appreciate so much your advice. Thanks again.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Lisa I don't know what I would do in your situation. I only know that what I see shows someone who is very giving, very loving, and trying to do the best they can think of through an extremely stressful, upsetting, and tiring situation.

My prayers and love to you both. I wish that everyone had a strong commitment like you both do.

Thank you so much! <3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Lisa, I'm wondering if there is anyone from church that come and sit with you in the evenings sometimes. Maybe just someone being there even if you don't talk, or maybe you do, or maybe someone just to hold you while you cry or to pray with you. Just throwing this out there. Again my heart goes out to you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • eclarke

      Two years out. Lost 120 , regained 5 lbs. Recently has a bout of Norovirus, lost 7 pounds in two days. Now my stomach feels like it did right after my surgery. Sore, sensitive to even water.  Anyone out there have a similar experience?
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Eve411

      April Surgery
      Am I the only struggling to get weight down. I started with weight of 297 and now im 280 but seem to not lose more weight. My nutrtionist told me not to worry about the pounds because I might still be losing inches. However, I do not really see much of a difference is this happen to any of you, if so any tips?
      Thanks
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Clueless_girl

      Well recovering from gallbladder removal was a lot like recovering from the modified duodenal switch surgery, twice in 4 months yay 🥳😭. I'm having to battle cravings for everything i shouldn't have, on top of trying to figure out what happens after i eat something. Sigh, let me fast forward a couple of months when everyday isn't a constant battle and i can function like a normal person again! 😞
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • KeeWee

      It's been 10 long years! Here is my VSG weight loss surgiversary update..
      https://www.ae1bmerchme.com/post/10-year-surgiversary-update-for-2024 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
      My general disposition lately is hopeful and motivated. The only thing that bugs me on a daily basis still is the way those supplements make my house smell. So stink! But I just bought a smell proof bag online that other people use to put their pot in. My house doesn't stink anymore. 
       
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×