All of us love to post after or during pics, and I'm no exception. Today however, I'm also posting my before pics in all their "Glory" and let me tell you, it's not easy to post these.

I used to wonder why vets hated posting their before pics. Surely it was a sign of how far they'd come? Now I understand why we hate posting them. Because we show ourselves and the world how far it had gone, how far out of control it was, and how much work we had ahead of us.

Feeling emotional today as I share these with you but forcing myself to be honest with myself. I hope someone who is unsure will look at these and realize it will all be worth it. That stupid liquid diet, the post-op not eating thing, the pain, the worry, the concern you will never lose, the stalls.

And FWIW, even with 85% of my stomach gone and a low carb diet, I only AVERAGE about 2 lbs of loss a week, including the early days of 20 lbs in one month. Yeah that doesn't happen anymore. This month I lost 2 lbs in a MONTH. So hang in there, it will happen for you as well

I'm 5'5 tall and large build based on wrist measurement. SW: 230, SW: 222, CW: 158.6, GW: 150

Edited April 27, 201412 yr by gamergirl

Thanks so much for this!! Awesome job! We are the same height and start weight....I can only hope I have the same success!

I'm sure you will! I am a very slow loser compared to some others so hopefully you will surpass me but even if you don't, lemme tell you, 70 lbs in 9 months doesn't suck

Gamergirl, you look AMAZING! Thank you for posting those pictures nad especially for what you wrote about emotions, how far things had gone, and how far you've come. I'm so impressed, and so happy for you. I love your practical truth telling attitude about slow loss and staying in the game too. Thank you VERY much - this post made me day. Kate

Kate, at first one thinks true weight loss is difficult and honestly, it can be. Then you realize the bigger battle is in wanting to be perfect. I don't know why we all want this. It's hardly like we were perfect before the surgery! But now, we all want to be perfect. And that's a toughie all right.

I completely understand the mental punishments we put ourselves through. I am 7 months out, down 70 lbs also, and goal is about 10 or so lbs away. People have commented positively to my weight loss. I am open about the fact I had surgery, but almost choked on my own response yesterday to the question about "how much have you lost?". I really do not want to admit to anyone, let alone myself, that I had let myself get so overweight. I tried to discuss these feelings with my husband who is very supportive, and said I should be proud of my achievement. He doesn't understand it, though. I can not be proud, and I still feel shame on looking at my old pictures. Some day this may resolve, but so far, my mental transformation has not caught up to my physical transformation. We women are strange creatures, I guess. PS: It's good to see you here again.

Thank you! Oh I can so relate! I don't want anyone knowin I had 80 lbs or lose! Somehow if I don't admit that, I wonder if my crazy head thinks they won't realize that?? I mean I look so different.

But my neighbor asked me that unthinkingly, and she's of course skinny and gorgeous, and the best I could do was say "a lot!"

But yes, I am proud AND I am ashamed. So I feel you

Gamegirl you are such inspiration. I thank you so much for posting your pictures. I know it might be hard doing it but you did it anyways. I'm glad I had the chance to see them cause in 11 days will be me having sleeve surgery and right now my anxiety level is very high. Your pictures helped me a lot to go thru this day and keep focus. I hope some day I will b able to do the same and help/inspire somebody else. You look great!!!!!

It's normal to feel anxious. Just don't let the anxiety stop you. Rather than focusing on the surgery, focus on visualizing your life after surgery. That Should cheer you right up because by golly, you're in for a great adventure

Hi so inspiring! Tomorrow is my surgery and I'm so scared I stumbled across the complication site and had no idea no one ever told me about complications (did think so bad) I am having second thoughts just since last night! I have a 4 yr old and can't imagine not being well enough to take care of him! Please any advice scared and nervous!

AJS for every 1 person that had complications are 99 of us who didn't. The complication rates are 1% on average. And while complications can and do occur without anyone being at "fault" the best you can do is follow all instructions closely, never ever cheat, and expect you are going to be in that 99 number rather than the 1 person.

For very one that has had a rough journey here are 99 who had an easy recovery. Educate and arm yourself and then know that you are more likely to be just fine than not.

Hi so inspiring! Tomorrow is my surgery and I'm so scared I stumbled across the complication site and had no idea no one ever told me about complications (did think so bad) I am having second thoughts just since last night! I have a 4 yr old and can't imagine not being well enough to take care of him! Please any advice scared and nervous!

I suggest you talk to a friend and ask them to be a back up in case it's needed. That may ease you mind. You ARE taking care of him by taking care of yourself.

My husband is very supportive and I have my family I'm just one of those people that have to do everything for my son. Thanks for responding in sure it's normal to feel this way. Thank you

Hi so inspiring! Tomorrow is my surgery and I'm so scared I stumbled across the complication site and had no idea no one ever told me about complications (did think so bad) I am having second thoughts just since last night! I have a 4 yr old and can't imagine not being well enough to take care of him! Please any advice scared and nervous!

AJS for every 1 person that had complications are 99 of us who didn't. The complication rates are 1% on average. And while complications can and do occur without anyone being at "fault" the best you can do is follow all instructions closely, never ever cheat, and expect you are going to be in that 99 number rather than the 1 person.

For very one that has had a rough journey here are 99 who had an easy recovery. Educate and arm yourself and then know that you are more likely to be just fine than not.

When I was about to get my date for surgery my surgeon asked me, what is the worst thing that can happen to you? I side stepped that question because I thought I knew what the worst thing was and had already made peace with it. He was not satisfied until I said the words out loud. You can die from this surgery!!!!!! That's right like you can die having any other surgery as well. Like having wisdom teeth removed...

The chances are pretty small as GG Said but don't kid yourself anything worth having involves risk and you have to decide if you are ready for what ever is coming to you. Once you have figured that you want to be there for your son and husband for many years to come and want this bad enough to change your life...Only you can answer that question..

So many come on the forum and talk about regrets when they are a few days out and they are in a little bit of pain or discomfort...It is real... This is it..Your working toward a better life and a healthier you....Your doing this because it is time to take control of the thing that controls you... Lots of work but lots of wonderful things ahead of you as well..

I am one that was not part of the 99% and I tell you..I would not go back for anything...All those years wasted, existing and not even living..Wish I could have had this a long time ago...Even with all the complications.....

I completely understand the mental punishments we put ourselves through. I am 7 months out, down 70 lbs also, and goal is about 10 or so lbs away. People have commented positively to my weight loss. I am open about the fact I had surgery, but almost choked on my own response yesterday to the question about "how much have you lost?". I really do not want to admit to anyone, let alone myself, that I had let myself get so overweight. I tried to discuss these feelings with my husband who is very supportive, and said I should be proud of my achievement. He doesn't understand it, though. I can not be proud, and I still feel shame on looking at my old pictures. Some day this may resolve, but so far, my mental transformation has not caught up to my physical transformation.

We women are strange creatures, I guess.

PS: It's good to see you here again.

The time for shame is over. You have made a big difference in your life. You took control of the beast and you are dealing with it. I can't imagine being ashamed of something that saved your life and probably is making you a better, healthier person. People on here like myself were over 300 -- 400---500 +. and started to live again...We are making a change that is all in the past..

Pick your head up and be proud of what you have accomplished and keep the photos as a reminder of where you came from and how hard you worked and who you are becoming. It is a celebration for you. The time for you. It is about you. You can't do this again.....You will never go back.. You have shown fortitude to work on yourself and make yourself a better, happier you.

Don't pick at the past but move forward....There is no going back...We live on. We grow, we change and we conquer!

Gamer Girl, it's so good to see you post again! I have missed you! And you look WONderful! Congratulations on your progress - I know how hard it is. So sorry to hear your RA is back.

Gamer Girl, it's so good to see you post again! I have missed you! And you look WONderful! Congratulations on your progress - I know how hard it is. So sorry to hear your RA is back.

Thank you Jean! As to the RA, I think it's back because I "misbehaved" with my diet. I didn't think a little sugar and wheat was going to knock me off course. I guess now we know hunh? I'm back to re-thinking cheat days and what they mean for me now. Perhaps it only means more calories, not different calories and macros.

Would love to hear how others handle cheat days.

Game Girl,

I have to say you look marvelous and are a skinny-mini. Congratulations and keep up the good work.

All of us love to post after or during pics, and I'm no exception. Today however, I'm also posting my before pics in all their "Glory" and let me tell you, it's not easy to post these. Fantastic job!!!

I used to wonder why vets hated posting their before pics. Surely it was a sign of how far they'd come? Now I understand why we hate posting them. Because we show ourselves and the world how far it had gone, how far out of control it was, and how much work we had ahead of us.

Feeling emotional today as I share these with you but forcing myself to be honest with myself. I hope someone who is unsure will look at these and realize it will all be worth it. That stupid liquid diet, the post-op not eating thing, the pain, the worry, the concern you will never lose, the stalls.

And FWIW, even with 85% of my stomach gone and a low carb diet, I only AVERAGE about 2 lbs of loss a week, including the early days of 20 lbs in one month. Yeah that doesn't happen anymore. This month I lost 2 lbs in a MONTH. So hang in there, it will happen for you as well

I'm 5'5 tall and large build based on wrist measurement. SW: 230, SW: 222, CW: 158.6, GW: 150

The time for shame is over. You have made a big difference in your life. You took control of the beast and you are dealing with it. I can't imagine being ashamed of something that saved your life and probably is making you a better, healthier person. People on here like myself were over 300 -- 400---500 +. and started to live again...We are making a change that is all in the past.. Pick your head up and be proud of what you have accomplished and keep the photos as a reminder of where you came from and how hard you worked and who you are becoming. It is a celebration for you. The time for you. It is about you. You can't do this again.....You will never go back.. You have shown fortitude to work on yourself and make yourself a better, happier you. Don't pick at the past but move forward....There is no going back...We live on. We grow, we change and we conquer!

Thanks for your kind words. Don't get me wrong; I am thrilled with the way things are going for me now but it's time for me to reconcile with the past. After so many years of blending into the background , I sometimes feel like a trespasser in a new world. Every day I make an planned effort to do something the old me wouldn't have done; some days it's taking a "selfie" , shopping for dresses, wearing a leather jacket or signing up for a 5k. I have work to do to forgive the past in order to fully embrace the future.

GG!! So great to see you back here! I still see you on MFP, but I miss your posts :-)

The time for shame is over. You have made a big difference in your life. You took control of the beast and you are dealing with it. I can't imagine being ashamed of something that saved your life and probably is making you a better, healthier person. People on here like myself were over 300 -- 400---500 +. and started to live again...We are making a change that is all in the past.. Pick your head up and be proud of what you have accomplished and keep the photos as a reminder of where you came from and how hard you worked and who you are becoming. It is a celebration for you. The time for you. It is about you. You can't do this again.....You will never go back.. You have shown fortitude to work on yourself and make yourself a better, happier you. Don't pick at the past but move forward....There is no going back...We live on. We grow, we change and we conquer!

Thanks for your kind words. Don't get me wrong; I am thrilled with the way things are going for me now but it's time for me to reconcile with the past. After so many years of blending into the background , I sometimes feel like a trespasser in a new world. Every day I make an planned effort to do something the old me wouldn't have done; some days it's taking a "selfie" , shopping for dresses, wearing a leather jacket or signing up for a 5k. I have work to do to forgive the past in order to fully embrace the future.

I too feel like a stranger in my own land. No one knows who I am and I find this unsettling at times..The dependence on things that used to be sometimes causes a fear in me that stops my breath..

There is nothing to forgive..you were who you were and you are now who you are...Don't allow the old you to creep in and take charge of your life...Have you not paid enough of a price already! I know I have and continue to do so....

I was in the hospital last week because of an ulcer turned abscess on my sleeve and I could not figure out why all the nurses I knew for over 5 months giving me constant care were so stand offish...I have been there a few times to let them see me as I progress and they seemed cold...

All of a sudden it was like a light bulb went off..They did not know who I was after just 2 months....Have I changed that much..Am I no longer me...No I am still me but better. I have learned a lot and continue to build the new me..

I read a few weeks ago a saying that read " Do something that scares you everyday." Well I have to say that I am there..You are as well. How many would really have the courage to keep fighting a battle that has controlled our every existence for so long...

I can truly say that inside and out I have grown to be a better person. I have a better understanding of the frailty of life and compassion for those who struggle to change....I am not perfect by no means and I will be the first to say it...But this is a life saving change that we had the strength to endure..Change and learn....We deserve to be proud of ourselves and not look back..Only a reflection of what could happen if we allow food to control us once more......

You deserve this like everyone else here that sat in the back ground and waited to be ridiculed or abused by people who think they had the right...I do not sit by now and allow people to say one thing about an overweight person. Just because it makes themselves feel better about their own hell..

See yourself as a new you..A new person with so much more to offer and give...Reach out!!! Find others to help....It is in you..I promise!!!!

Oh as an after thought......I am a leather jacket freak now myself... Always on the lookout for a new style!!!

Your awesome.You were awesome...You are still you and you deserve to take care of you....

An interesting quote today said: Confront the dark parts of yourself, and work to banish them with illumination and forgiveness. Your willingness to wrestle with your demons will cause your angels to sing.

Edited April 28, 201412 yr by RJ'S/beginning