I cried for an obese man

[BariatricGirl 220]

2muchfun, I couldnt of said it better ! About a year and a half ago a high school friend of my daughters came through my line at work with his dad, (early 40's) who was in an electric wheel chair. The kid introduced us, the dad and I chatted while I rang him up. Guess what he bought ?? Yep, soda pop and several candy bars ! Eeeeeeeeeeeek ! Im NOT perfect, I have a little sweet or chocolate everyday, but did this guy just NOT get it that he was in a wheelchair because of his eating habits !????? I wanted to tell him about lapband so bad, but definetly not the time or place ! (Although that has not ever stopped my daughter from telling anybody and everybody that i had a lap band done when they ask her how I lost my weight ! )

For some people food is a drug and all food is legal. For me it seems like a perfect example of how much pull food can have and many people have also just given up. I've known a couple of people who had emphysema and were told if they didn't quit smoking they would die but kept smoking. For them life wasn't worth living without smoking and for some people life isn't worth living without food. I like that your daughter is open about your Lap Band....there should be no shame involved.

[BariatricGirl 220]

pink dahlia - Who are we to judge though hey? People eat for different reasons - many overeat because they have been sexually abused as a child (studies show there is a strong link), hypothyroidism, he could have been placed on psych drugs (drugs such as seroquel make a person crave carbohydrates), these drugs also cause a condition called metabolic disorder (nearly puts the metabolism to a stand still). IF I looked at my sister in law from an outsiders point of view, I would think, wow, she must eat a lot - but in fact she has hypothyroidism. He could be in his wheelchair because of conditions like MS, he may have had an accident when he was younger damaging his spine; I have a friend who uses a wheelchair because she has Crohn's disorder and gets tired. We aren't in a position to judge.

I don't think pink dahlia meant to be judgmental...really more of making a point of how many times we see things where we wish we could share with people all the things that saved our own lives. One point in particular that you brought up that is very important and that's how many people in our community have been sexually or mentally abused. I think it is far more common than most think. That's exactly why we need so much support to heal those psychological wounds and some of them are passed down through dysfunctional families generation after generation. I actually decided to have my tubes tied at 31 because I wanted to stop the insanity that I believed was being passed on. When I see someone who is obese my heart breaks because I know that deep down inside there is a person who wants to escape that outside shell and they feel like most people won't give them a chance and unfortunately that's pretty much true.

[#MagicWithinme 173]

I can so relate, a few months ago, a large lady feel here at work outside, and she was not able to get up and we could not touch her, (liability stuff) the fire department is right behind where I work, they were here in minutes and then they called 2 more trucks. so total 6 people,to help her sit up, she was not so much hurt but embarrassed.. I was inside the office, I started crying, and my co-worker was what's wrong with you? I'm trying to explain to her, I understand and feel her pain, the embarrassment. She said you were never "that big". I 'was that's not the point, but I could tell she just didn't understand. Unless you've been in that position, you will never know what it feels like.

[RJ'S/beginning 5,357]

I can so relate, a few months ago, a large lady feel here at work outside, and she was not able to get up and we could not touch her, (liability stuff) the fire department is right behind where I work, they were here in minutes and then they called 2 more trucks. so total 6 people,to help her sit up, she was not so much hurt but embarrassed.. I was inside the office, I started crying, and my co-worker was what's wrong with you? I'm trying to explain to her, I understand and feel her pain, the embarrassment. She said you were never "that big". I 'was that's not the point, but I could tell she just didn't understand. Unless you've been in that position, you will never know what it feels like.

I just bawled my head off reading this.....You just want to crawl in a corner and die....doesn't matter what your co-worker said. It was you who felt this woman's pain and it was you who knew what she was feeling and it was you who cried for her....

One change at a time.....One changed feeling at a time....

Your right you know...A lot of people are exactly what the scarecrow said in the wizard of Oz:

Scarecrow: "...some people without brains do an awful lot of talking... don't they?"

[BariatricGirl 220]

I can so relate, a few months ago, a large lady feel here at work outside, and she was not able to get up and we could not touch her, (liability stuff) the fire department is right behind where I work, they were here in minutes and then they called 2 more trucks. so total 6 people,to help her sit up, she was not so much hurt but embarrassed.. I was inside the office, I started crying, and my co-worker was what's wrong with you? I'm trying to explain to her, I understand and feel her pain, the embarrassment. She said you were never "that big". I 'was that's not the point, but I could tell she just didn't understand. Unless you've been in that position, you will never know what it feels like.

What a beautiful story. And while I understand the liability stuff I would probably have had to get other employees to sit on me to not try to help. I mean I understand there are rules....I just tend to throw them out the window when someone is in distress. I'm grateful the fire department was so close.

I didn't fall but my moment that was like that was when my mom died. She had been dying of cancer for a year and even though I was huge I got bigger that year because I gave up. For so long I had isolated and only went to work and one store and the morning of the funeral I realized that I would have to face tons of people who hadn't seen me in years. I wanted to crawl in a hole. I could see the looks on their faces....poor Yvonne...she was so pretty in college...look how she has let herself go. (I managed a couple of years in college to be anorexic but could never get it back) I couldn't have been more embarrassed and ashamed at the same time. On top of that I lost my mom and wanted to die.

Your heart is so big and it was wonderful that you felt for that woman. Thank you for sharing.

[BariatricGirl 220]

I can so relate, a few months ago, a large lady feel here at work outside, and she was not able to get up and we could not touch her, (liability stuff) the fire department is right behind where I work, they were here in minutes and then they called 2 more trucks. so total 6 people,to help her sit up, she was not so much hurt but embarrassed.. I was inside the office, I started crying, and my co-worker was what's wrong with you? I'm trying to explain to her, I understand and feel her pain, the embarrassment. She said you were never "that big". I 'was that's not the point, but I could tell she just didn't understand. Unless you've been in that position, you will never know what it feels like.

I just bawled my head off reading this.....You just want to crawl in a corner and die....doesn't matter what your co-worker said. It was you who felt this woman's pain and it was you who knew what she was feeling and it was you who cried for her....

One change at a time.....One changed feeling at a time....

Your right you know...A lot of people are exactly what the scarecrow said in the wizard of Oz:

Scarecrow: "...some people without brains do an awful lot of talking... don't they?"

Excellent comment!!!